


Mind Games

by Zeds_Dead_Reader (Zeds_Dead)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Canon, Angst, Betrayal, Death, Despair, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Fantasy, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Grief/Mourning, Happy And Sad Ending, Humour Me, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Loud Sex, Manga Spoilers, Marriage, Murder, Old Friends, Reader-Insert, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-03-09
Packaged: 2018-05-25 08:54:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 51,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6188203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeds_Dead/pseuds/Zeds_Dead_Reader
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You had always been different and led a rather lonely existence, rarely letting anyone get too close to you. Memories of lost companions had hung vivid in your mind and your past had made you the person you were today - strong, determined and focussed.</p><p>Using that strength, you decided to answer the call of enlistment, pushing all of your skills towards a goal. A purpose.</p><p>Choosing the path of the survey corps was obvious as you had an unrivalled strength in your trainee squad and wanted to put it to good use for once.</p><p>You had not expected what awaited you when you entered the imposing grounds of the survey corps HQ, the man you were reunited with and were wholly unprepared for the journey that followed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beginnings And New Starts

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted under my other deleted account in October 2015, I'm moving everything over here now, taking my works with me. 
> 
> These are 100% mine from the account, if you have read this work before, it would have been on my other username. I have not stolen this. 
> 
> Apologies for any weird symbols in the text, my phone is not the kindest for converting from one format to another...
> 
> Doing some edits as this was my second ever fic, finding things to clean up...writing style changed somewhat since this...may take a while.
> 
> Takes place before the attempt to reclaim Wall Maria which I think is when I wrote it. There's probably continuity issues but...hey, go with it ;) And I'm adding my own spin, off on a total fantasy tangent...

The wind blew a breeze across the training ground, sending dust in circles and small tornados around your feet. Particles clung to your clothing and got in your eyes, invaded your mouth. It was hot, so damn hot as you stood in your uniform, just one in a short line of fellow recruits. The small crowd was made from males and females alike, a variety of ages but you guessed you were one of the eldest. Most people in their early twenties had more sense than to be standing where you were.

You had finished training in the top ten of your class but chose the Survey Corps, the wings of freedom proudly on your back. You heard snippets of words in your head and shut your mind to them, silently cursing your brain for listening.

Three people made their way over to the new recruits, one of them you recognised as Commander Erwin who had addressed you all yesterday before you made it to the HQ. There was a slightly crazed but friendly looking woman also, along with a shorter man. Your breath stopped in your chest. It was him. You had never expected to see the guy again, not knowing what had become of him or his friends. One day they just disappeared.

The trio of superiors stood before you all, eyes scanning the sparse crowd. The small man's eyes fell on yours and you hoped for a slight change in his otherwise bored expression, but none came. His stony gaze passed to the next recruit without a flicker. "He must not remember me," you thought. "I guess I was only a kid back then, why would he?" Slight sorrow pulled at your heart for a second and you mentally pushed the feeling away, not allowing it to cloud your otherwise sharp mind.

Unknown to you, Levi had in fact noticed the woman standing in front of him. He couldn't believe it. Memories from all those years ago came flooding back to him in seconds, making him remember all those he had lost along the way. He thought you had been one of them, but here you were, usual determination in your (e/c) eyes. You were different though. Undoubtedly you looked physically stronger than you were, yet there was something else. Pain? Regret? He wasn't sure but made a mental note to keep an eye on you.

Not wanting to show his recognition, he moved on to stare down the frightened looking mouse of a man next to you, no emotions shown outwardly.

~~~~~~~~~

You hadn't really made many close friends whilst a trainee, preferring to keep to yourself. One person, however, had chipped away at you until you gave in and became best of friends. Alana sat next to you now as you both dug into your lunch, the hot stew silencing your grumbling stomach. Hand to hand combat had been the exercise of the morning, a chance to show your superiors what you were made of, you guessed. You excelled in this area, years of practice under your belt and you'd gone all out, flooring large men with ease. Your height against theirs was not a problem as you used your speed and skill against them.

"Nice job today (F/N)," said Jared, one of the broadest men in your small group of recruits. He held his hand up for you to high five, which you did with a bit of embarrassment. It had taken all of 43 seconds to make him submit out on the training ground earlier, but he didn't seem to mind. Back in trainee days he would have ignored you for weeks after that, but now you were in the Survey Corps, you all realised you would have to depend on each other - having a strong ally that could kick your ass was better than having an equally strong enemy.

"That was so fucking funny earlier out there (F/N)" Alana said through mouthfulls of bread. "You're deceptively strong!" She started laughing, remembering the huge man's swift fall. You smirked back at her, evil streak coming out. Your eyes looked up to find Jared again. He was gesturing something obscure that looked like he wanted to go round two with you tomorrow. Puffing your chest out, chin in the air, you motioned with your hands to say 'Bring it on!' Roars of laughter echoed through the mess hall as Jared blew you a kiss. You hadn't really spoken much to him at all but the camaraderie of finally being in the most dangerous profession had rubbed off on you all.

Watching the scene play out, Erwin smiled slightly from his table, happy for the new recruits to let loose a bit in their new environment before the harshness kicked in. Levi grunted in disapproval, sipping his tea looking thoroughly fed up with the whole spectacle. The woman, Hange, sat next to him and elbowed him in the ribs.

"C'mon shorty, lighten up a bit! They're just having a bit of fun". He slowly moved his head to look at her, pure disdain in his grey eyes. 

"Tch" was his only reply, turning once more to his tea. He watched you playfully challenging your comrades like you hadn't a care in the world, such a difference from the aura of sorrow he sensed that surrounded you earlier.

You finished messing with Jared and turned back to eat. Before you could look down to your food, a (e/c) gaze made contact with a steely, cold stare. Levi was watching you. His eyes flicked back to the side quickly, not wanting to be caught staring, but you had seen it.

Due to the small number of recruits, everyone had their own room. You missed Alana's company at night but it was nice to have a place to call home again. Lying back on the bed, you thought about how today's non-reunion had gone. You hadn't expected to ever set eyes on your saviour again, but here he was and here you were.

Your mind shifted to recall the past and how you had met the stoic man.

It was at the age of ten when your parents disowned you. Abandoned you. They didn't trust you, didn't understand your abilities and it scared them. You knew you were always a burden to them anyway, so you guess it came as no surprise. One day you came home and the door was locked, a note on the impassable entrance. "We've gone. Don't try to find us". That was it, no wishes of luck, words of wisdom. Nothing. Just the note in your mother's delicate handwriting. You didn't cry, no love was lost but you worried about where to go. Even as a child you had very few friends.

A couple of years were spent living in an empty shed, scrounging food and water where you could, no contact with anyone really. Then one day a man approached you on the street, full of friendly words, promising shelter and sustenance. Believing his words, you went with him - you were only twelve for fuck's sake, knowing no better. Before you knew it you were in dark, stinking streets, screams coming from every alley way, half naked women looking suggestively at every passer by, despair seeping from every wall.

Soon you had been sold to the highest bidder, a slimy, greasy slug of a man. You were locked in an animal cage and left in a dark room, aware that you were not alone, shapes and corners denoting that there were more cages in the dank prison. A faint sobbing noise reached your ears, a wretched sound that made your head ache and nausea wash over you. "Not here," you thought, digging your fingers in to clenched fists, trying to stop the incoming pain.

Suddenly you heard a click. It rang out in the pitch black room, a clear sound. Whispers and slight movement followed. You feared the disgusting man had returned and shrank back into your cage. Soft light entered from behind and you turned to see a small hatch on the wall near the ceiling that had been opened. A flash of red hair appeared, then retreated. Curious, you shuffled around as a face came through the small gap. It was a boy, no, teenager, dark hair falling over his features as he leant down. Silver eyes met yours as he looked upon you without emotion and the facade disappeared, more hushed words held. Without warning, a leg came through the hatch, then another and the pale teen landed soundlessly on the stone floor next to you. Making eye contact once more, he raised a finger to his lips. You nodded briefly, acknowledging his request for silence as the guy moved round and picked the lock on your cage, beckoning towards himself. This, you knew, was safety and you did not hesitate.

He shifted into the darkness and you heard only slight scratches as more cages were conquered. Looking up at the hole he had come through, you could see it better now that you weren't restricted - it wasn't a hatch at all, it was an air vent, the only way the imprisoner's prey could survive.

Noises outside the door froze everyone. You couldn't see them but you felt it as bodies tensed. The sounds faded and your liberator moved towards the opening he had entered by. One by one, he boosted the now free children up with his hands to be grabbed by a figure, only seeing a tuft of blonde hair. You instinctively made sure the others were ok, ushering them towards the light and your saviours before even considering your own safety.

The all but last child taken up and the owner of the silver eyes looked at you, hands ready to lift you to freedom. Keys rattled in the door and you looked at him with panic. Without hesitation he grabbed you, holding up the final escapee. You raised your arms to make it easier and found yourself lying on the streets above. The girl with the red hair grinned with a thumbs up, but you threw yourself to the vent once more, concern growing. He stood still, eyes flashing up as you heard locks engaging and you stopped thinking, pushing everything you had in your being to save him, to tell the men outside the door to stop, stop bothering, there's no need, there's nothing wrong here, take your keys out and go.

You cried out and collapsed after you heard the footsteps retreat, safe in the knowledge the men had gone. The tufty blonde teen lowered a rope quickly down to retrieve the one who saved you; the one who you had saved in return.

Most of the children had scattered, a life in the underground a second nature to them so only you and two others remained, the pair hanging onto the girl with red hair and you lying on the ground, one hand over your eyes and the other rubbing your temple. You were aware of a presence at your side and a strong hand gripped yours.

"Are you ok?" You barely heard him, mind fogged from effort. "Yea, mmmm, yea, just...yea," was all you could manage. The pain was unreal, shooting daggers into your head and eyes blinded. There was a short silence before your rescuers decided it was not safe to stay here. "Tch. I suppose I have to carry you then, brat."

You had no idea what was happening, but you were grabbed gently and lifted. It felt like you were in the air, flying over roof tops, but that couldn't be possible. Total inability to see had taken it's hold but you were glad to have saved someone. Exhausted, you curled into the body that was holding you, having dreamed of this for years, just a simple hug - you'd never had one before, even from your parents.

The three of you had spent the night at the home of the ones who had saved you and as vision returned, you noted how clean your surroundings were. Introductions had been made and the teen you knew now as Isabel was fussing around the younger children, providing soup and water. The large friendly one was called Farlan and he spoke in hushed tones to the eldest, Levi. The expression on his face never changed, it was unreadable, as was he. You drew a blank with him, the bored, half lidded look on his features kept any emotion locked deep away. The other two children that had been freed were called Helena and Chase, frightened faces peering out from the blanket they huddled under together, not knowing what to make of this situation. You pinned them at around ten years old, maybe less and felt a protective nature towards the two, despite being only just shy of your thirteenth birthday.

You continued to watch over them when the three of you were living in a small basement, a home that the older teens had sourced for you. Isabel and Farlan came by regularly, checking you were ok, teaching you how to steal to survive and how to evade capture. They pointed out easy targets and those to stay away from, mainly the Military Police. If they caught you, it was game over. You were a natural, obtaining sustenance as well as a few luxuries like candles for you and your younger friends. Levi visited rarely and when he did, he spoke only in single words, conversations entirely one sided on your part. Still unable to get a grasp on his nature, you trusted him nonetheless. He always smelt slightly of bleach and his clothing was impeccable at all times. It amused you to see someone still so young looking so grown up.

A couple of years passed. Your skills at thieving grew and you managed to procure gifts sometimes; a ribbon for Isabel's hair, a manly leather cuff bracelet for Farlan. A store was about to close for business and you hung around in the shadows, waiting and watching. The owner locked up, sighing and sad at losing his business as he walked slowly off into the winding maze of alleyways and roads, signalling it was time for you to move. You'd been watching this place for a while and excitement ran through your veins as you entered the premises, expertly picking the lock. Bundles of unsold items remained and you knew the vendor was planning to sell it off cheap at a market tomorrow. You had seen him purchasing a small fold up table and cloth, his modest stall set up. Quickly, you shoved anything you could into your bag, making your way to the back to the items you were really here for. Folded pieces of cloth laid on sparse shelves and you delicately ran your hands over them, feeling the soft fabric beneath your fingers, smiling as you selected one of brilliant white. Keeping it neat, you carefully placed it in your back pocket, making sure it didn't crease.

Later that night you stopped by your older friend's abode. Chatting lightly with Isabel and Farlan, you discussed your days, how Helena and Chase were and your impending sixteenth birthday. "We have to do something, (F/N), it will be so much fun!" squealed Isabel, gripping your hands tightly. You laughed at her, she was so vivacious and excitable. Farlan patted your head. 

"You'll be all grown up soon," he mocked. You slapped his hand away, scowling. 

"I'm already perfectly grown up, thank you very much" you muttered. Laughing, he moved to boil water and brew tea and you took the chance to sneak into the absent Levi's room, laying the folded cloth on his bed along with a scrap of packing paper. You'd managed to find a piece of charcoal and had written a simple note. "Thank you" was all it said.

Life went by as usual. Helena and Chase had formed a strong bond and the stolen glances along with hand-holding in secret confirmed what you had already known. You were happy for them, it took a lot to find love, albeit child-like, in this world. Then one day, something changed. Levi came by more often and sat you down when the young lovers were out. "(F/N), I need to teach you something." Your eyes lit up and you sat in anticipation. "If you're going to go raiding tailor's shops and such like, you need to know how to defend yourself properly." He had never spoken about the gift you had left for him that night last year, had simply nodded his thanks at you the next time he saw you, his new, crisp cravat sitting proudly round his neck.

Levi set about teaching you hand to hand combat. There was a fire in you, but it was untrained, sloppy. You worked out in his place, being bigger, furniture moved to the side to allow a larger area. For the hundredth time, Levi pinned you to the floor. Panting, you struggled to get up but his hands gripped your wrists and his body was pressed down solidly against yours. "Aw come on bro, let her up," chided Isabel. His eyes remained on yours, still no expression, no emotion, nothing. He hadn't even broken out in a sweat and his breathing was at the same slow pace it always was. 

"She needs to learn."

Weeks passed as your skill increased and you were sitting on top of your teacher, beaming from ear to ear, hands holding him down. A lingering thought was in your head that said he had let you win, but you were ecstatic nonetheless. "Ha!" You looked down at him and thought you saw a faint flash in his otherwise cold eyes, a smirk threatening the corners of his lips. Your mind picked something up, words dancing around in your head but you weren't able to make any sense of them. As quickly as that had all appeared, it was gone again and you heard a familiar sound. 

"Tch. Brat, you're getting me all filthy down here." The voice drawled, sounding like he couldn't care less about the words he had just said and you jumped off, offering a hand to help but he slapped it brusquely away and rose to his feet in annoyance. Brushing himself down, eyes searching for non-existent specks of dirt, he muttered to you. "Not bad. You're getting there. Even if you are tiresome." You took that as a compliment and beamed once more. Something had been nagging at you recently and you took the chance to get it out in the open.

"Levi, can I ask you something?" Nothing. Moments passed and the air was thick with silence. His grey eyes looked up at you, drilling into your soul. 

"Well come on, I haven't got all day." Taking this as your cue to continue, you met his gaze.

"Why did you decide to teach me this now?" He stared at you for what seemed like hours, sizing you up with a dark expression. Eventually, he spoke. 

"Because you were going to get yourself killed and I didn't want to deal with the mess." Standard Levi. Worrying about the clean up operation. You would have felt upset at these words, but you knew him too well by now to know that was just how he was. An emotionless stone of a man now stood before you, having grown from the emotionless stone of a teen that you had met that day. His voice startled you, having thought that the conversation was over. "And I knew you were ready for it." Turning to move the furniture back to its rightful place, he left you standing in the middle of the room to think about his words. You were ready for it. Of course you were. You had proved it to him by being able to take care of yourself, as well as the two younger teens that you lived with and were ready to take it to the next level. Thieving could only get you so far in life and you knew that soon, you would have to fight for what you needed.

Grabbing a chair, you helped to return the room to how it should be and sat down heavily, unwrapping the protective bandages from your hands. You had been using a hastily created punch bag in your home too to build up on your strength, red marks were a constant feature on your knuckles.

You could feel that you were getting stronger, muscles more defined and you had learnt skilful moves quickly. Levi taught you how to use your speed and dexterity to your advantage, pointing out that despite his small stature, he had never yet lost in a fight. You had listened intently to his teachings and practiced moves with the punch bag into the early hours of the morning, striving to be better, faster, more independent than you already were.

Progress was fast and one evening Farlan came to see you. Watching you remove your bandages, he sat and took in your appearance, noticing your lean tone and the determination on your face. He was impressed how far you had come from that timid 12 year old he helped pull from a basement prison. You noticed he had something large wrapped up under a rough blanket and looked at him for an answer. He revealed his items, shiny metal glinting against dark leather. You had no idea what it was but it looked like great fun. "This is how we move around the city at night," he explained. "I'm gonna teach you how to use this as its far safer than walking the streets." He went through the mechanics of the gear, talking you through how to refill the gas and propel yourself over the rooftops. It sounded exhilarating and you couldn't wait to try it out.

Flying over the grimy city below, the wind in your (h/c) hair, you had never felt so alive. Farlan turned and laughed at your smile, a look of euphoria on your features. He shot his hooks out and swiftly changed direction, making difficult manoeuvres to see if you could keep up. You'd been learning from him for a few weeks now and followed the man easily, swinging round houses and buildings, the swarm of people that you shared the city with just inconsequential blobs in the distance. He smiled as you drew level with him, matching his speed. "You're doing great (F/N)," he shouted. "Just keep an eye on your gas". You checked the level, seeing that you would need to refill soon. Setting down on the roof of a nearby building, the two of you changed your canisters and caught your breath. Looking out over the crowded streets, you surmised there probably a crime taking place in at least half of them at any given time. One day you would leave this place, you vowed. One day you would get to the surface again and you would use your skills to do some good.

Helena and Chase had left, moving somewhere on their own. It suited you just fine; you never saw them anyway when they did live in the basement so it was no great loss. They had decided that they'd outgrown you, didn't need your protection and support any more. You doubted that as you looked over the place you called home, their belongings now gone. Belongings they had because of you. Some were stolen, others paid for as you had taken on some hours working in a seedy bar. You'd even built some furniture for them from scrounged wood. It wasn't that they had taken it with them that bothered you, it was the fact that you knew they would have none of it if you hadn't have been there to look after them and their future safety was concerning. They were too weak, too laid back.

It was two days after your nineteenth birthday that it happened, a day forever etched on your memory. The day your friends were taken.

An unusually large number of military had been sniffing around for the past few days and your senses were on high alert. Hiding in a dark corner, you heard shouting and feet running across the cobbled streets. Voices demanded information, but there was no reply. You wondered who it was that had been caught and snuck your head round the wall to see what was happening. Breath wouldn't come as you stood stock still just staring at the situation as it unfolded swiftly. From your limited view, all that could be seen was a face being shoved into a filthy puddle. The face belonged to Levi. Blood running cold, you weren't sure what to do. Part of you wanted to run at them, run towards the men who held you friend and fight them, throw punches until they let him go. Then common sense took over - if you did that then you would both be caught, leaving neither of you to come and save the other.

Just then, two more captives came into view and your heart sank. Isabel and Farlan. Not them too? A sick feeling crept through your stomach, making it feel like it was made of stone. Your legs wouldn't move, you just stared helplessly as your friends were taken away by people you couldn't see. Flashes of boots or hair colour was all you had, you couldn't even tell who it was that had them so you had no hope of finding those dear to you ever again. They were loaded on to a horse drawn cart and it began to move off quickly so you gave chase using the manoeuvre gear, following its progress silently from above. You still had no indication of who had the three, no insignia was visible. Eventually you could chase no more, the cart exiting through guarded gates.

Slumping to your knees, all energy seeped out of you like something was sucking your very life force away. You stared at the gateway that your friends had been taken through, unable to move, unable to do anything other than just stare. The only three people that you had ever trusted in your life had gone and you could do nothing about it. Unsure how long you'd been sat on the roof, you decided that you had better move along before more military showed up. A tear ran down your face and you made yourself a promise at that moment that you would never allow close friends ever again.

One day you had a moment of clarity. Sitting in tge dark basement alone, you wondered what this was all for, what was the point. You weren't suicidal, just needed to have a reason to exist. Your strength and agility was being wasted down here and there was a burning desire to make a difference. At that, you packed a bag of a few possessions and made your way with your gear to the secret way out that Farlan had shown you. Slipping past the drunken guards easily without a second look back, you made your way to the outside and left the underground city for the last time.

It had been 5 years since they were taken and here you were, lying in the Survey Corps HQ, knowing that the man you had been close to all those years ago was also within these walls. He was safe. That thought allowed you to slip soundly to sleep.


	2. Proving Your Worth

It was morning and you were up early, showered and dressed ready for what the day would bring. You walked quietly to Alana's room and stuck your head round the door. She was sprawled out on the bed like a starfish and you laughed to yourself softly, remembering what had happened one night in the trainee barracks. The bunks had not been spacious enough for her usual sleeping position but her slumbering body didn't know that. First an arm had dropped over the edge, then a leg and it wasn't long before her whole body came crashing down. A few of you had been awake to witness this and it was all you could talk about for days. Alana didn't mind, she was the first person to laugh at her stupidity and joined in with good natured hilarity. 

You watched your friend sleep as she dribbled slightly onto the pillow, her dreams full of meaningless shapes. She knew some of your past, but you had left out any stories of people when you recounted it, not wanting to bring their memories back. Alana herself had grown up in Sina, a rich man's daughter who decided to go against her father's plans of arranged marriage and joined the military training squad. He had pretty much disowned her for it, however occasionally wrote letters to her just to tell your friend how disappointed he was. It hurt her to read them and sometimes she would simply throw the papers away. She hadn't been in the top ten in training but had come a close 12; her penchant for fooling around had meant that she didn't do as well as she could have. But she was, like you, certain of which division she wanted to join. She hadn't seen anyone be eaten by a titan, or suffered loss, but still had a deep belief that she could make a difference. Both probably deluded, you thought, but you were here now.

Looking out the window, you figured it was still pretty early but sleep wasn't an option anymore, so you decided to explore the castle that housed the Survey Corps and get your bearings.

Halls led to doors and stairs and yet more halls. It was quite the maze and it took some self assurance to convince your confused sense of direction that you would get the hang of it soon. You hadn't seen anyone from other brigades yet, only your colleagues and you figured they were on a supply run or something. Whilst training, you all been kept up to date with what had been going on, inside and outside the walls, but not in much detail. No names were given, nor specifics, but you knew of heavy losses and battles to restore humanities safety. You had also heard of the titan shifters and that one was an ally amongst the 104th. That interested you no end, someone else who was different. 

Lost in thought, you found yourself outside by the stables, rows of empty stalls adding credence to your idea of the supply run. Two horses remained and you approached them, sending soothing thoughts to the beasts. The first one was not interested in any kind of contact, so you moved to the smaller of the pair. This one was more open to your presence and you reached out to stroke its mane, moving to scratch behind its itchy ear. You murmured soft words to it, agreeing that yes, that leg does look a bit sore and no, you had no food.

So engrossed in the conversation, you didn't notice someone watching. A pair of eyes looked upon you in mild interest, observing what appeared to be a young woman talking to a horse. Silently, the owner of the eyes moved over behind you, causing a flinch when they spoke.

"What the fuck are you doing?" You jumped and spun, grey eyes holding confusion and relief all at once, the emotions hidden so far deep beneath their cool exterior that most people wouldn't have seen it. But you knew those orbs well and were aware of the slight change in their appearance. You still couldn't get a read on him though. Typical. Not knowing what to do, you worked on the assumption that he had forgotten most of the past, or that you had changed so much whilst growing up that you weren't recognisable. 

Saluting, you addressed your superior correctly and with conviction. "Captain." He simply stared at you, same unmoving gaze but underneath he was wondering what the hell was going on. You held his glare, not wanting to appear weak and left your salute strong on your chest. He raised a slim eyebrow almost imperceptibly and waved your salute away. 

"Just call me by my first name, (L/N), no need for pretence." Slowly you dropped your arms, but you didn't know what to do now. All these years you had wondered what had become of the three friends, and words failed you. "Are you going to speak or not, brat?" Gathering yourself together, you began to speak, unsure what was going to come out until it did.

"I thought you were dead." Whispering, your eyes became wide and full of wonder. The faint suggestion of a smirk tugged at his lips. 

"Well clearly I am very much alive, so that was a fucking stupid thing to start with." Smiling at how much you had enjoyed his harshness, you spoke in a quiet voice. 

"I missed you, Levi." A cloud came over his scowl and you heard words, so faint but you were finally able to pick something up. 'I'm sorry' they said soundlessly. 

"Why are you sorry?" You'd sais it without thinking and darkness set in on his features, a frown deepening across his eyebrows. 

"Who said I was sorry?" Oh shit. Carefully you remained calm and tried to offer a plausible explanation. 

"N-no one, I just thought you looked a bit, you know, sad?" He glanced down and pulled at non-existent fluff on his sleeve. 

"Tch." Turning his attention back to you, he spoke once more. "Why the fuck would I be sorry, shithead?" That made you smile again, pure Levi in full force. You had learnt that his demeanour was just who he was and took no offence in the slightest.

"I'm glad to see service hasn't changed you, Levi." Smiling warmly, a scent of faint cleaning fluid reached your nose in the morning breeze. That reminded you of another question you needed to ask. "What happened anyway? How did you end up here?" Before he could answer, a large man approached, huge and imposing and he stopped beside the smaller male and looked at the pair of you.

"Commander!" Saluting, you put your best obedient and defiant look on, but he smiled in a friendly manner, gesturing for you to be at ease. 

"(L/N), isn't it?" You nodded in affirmation. "Captain Levi and I were very impressed with your performance out on the sparring grounds yesterday." You bowed slightly in thanks as Levi started to pick at his sleeve again in complete disinterest, sighing slightly as he looked out towards the trees, seeming like he would rather be knee deep in shit than having this conversation. "I'm looking forward to seeing you tackle the exercise today, (L/N). Until then." Erwin took his leave and you saluted once more. The pale man knew he had to follow his superior, due at an early meeting to recap on the supply run that was to return today. He shot you a stare first that told you this conversation wasn't over and marched off with an angry strut.

You made your way back to Alana's room, taking a few wrong turns on the way but correcting yourself eventually. A few people milled around the headquarters, nodding at you in greeting as they busied themselves with their work. You hadn't recognised a single person and presumed that the other soldiers had returned from wherever they had been.

Knocking on your friend's door, you entered without waiting for a reply. "(F/N), jeez, I'm getting ready here! Fuck!" She grabbed a piece of clothing to try to cover her modesty, cheeks flushed. 

"Nothing I've never seen before, Alana, especially as you don't like to wear anything in bed." She blushed deeper and threw a sock at your head, narrowly missing it's intended target. Pulling her clothes on, she chatted excitedly. 

"I wonder what today's exercise will be? I hope its fun. Maybe the other guys from the squads will be back too?" Sitting on her messy bed, you joined in the conversation.

"Hopefully whatever it is will give us a chance to show up those boys again." Voice dripping with mischief, you winked. "And I think the others are homd, I saw a few unfamiliar faces when I went for a walk earlier." Choosing not to mention Levi or Erwin, you watched your friend's eyes light up at the prospect of proving that both of you were better than the stocky males amongst your ranks. Her toothbrush hung limply from her mouth as she hurried to get ready, almost shaking in anticipation of what would come today.

She had such life, such passion for her role in the Corps and you loved her for it. She could be scatty and downright eccentric at times, but her heart was pure and she put her soul into her career. During your time together, you had learnt of her past, her cushy lifestyle and how it didn't suit her in the slightest. Alana was a masculine girl, not caring for dresses and finery, much preferring to roll up her sleeves and get stuck in. She was friends with the servants at her father's home more than she was the snotty nosed children that he tried to force upon her, helping to cook dinners, clean rooms and weed the extensive gardens. Often she would enter the house covered in mud or carrying a bucket of worms, her father despairing at the child that stood before him. In a way, you were both connected by the fact that your parents had disliked you, and you them, never having a regular childhood. But then in this world, what was a regular childhood? Sighing at that bleak thought, you turned to your friend. "Are you ready to go or what Alana? I'm fucking starving." She pulled her boots on and the two of you ran off hand in hand to the mess hall to get breakfast.

Many more bodies occupied the space today and you saw that you were correct in your assumption that they had been away to get supplies. The choice for breakfast was causing great excitement to some of the squad members, one dark haired girl in particular practically worshipping the bacon that laid steaming in front of her, eyes glazed and a moaning noise coming from her lips. Thinking on it, you hadn't had bacon in years so you and Alana joined the throng of mesmerized members of the Survey Corps. Trays in hand, you chose two seats at the end of a relatively empty table and dug in to your breakfast with gusto. Mouth full of food, she turned to you, grinning widely. "Oh my god (F/N), this is so good. I think I can die in a titan's jaw happy now." You knew what she was like, words spilled out before she thought of what she was saying.

Two people had sat down beside you but until now, you hadn't paid them any attention. Feeling them stiffen, you heard ghost-like words. "What does she know?" and "How can she say that after what happened?" With a sad look on your face, you turned to those next to you and began to apologise for your friend. 

"I'm so sorry, she just doesn't have that mouth to brain connection that most of us do. She means no harm. Please don't be upset." They looked at you, slightly surprised that you had addressed their concerns without knowing what they were. One of them, a brown haired boy with striking eyes, offered his hand in introduction. You took it, looking into his bright orbs and finding pain, a lot of pain, along with confusion. Instantly you warmed to him and spoke softly, afraid that anything louder would break him. "I'm (F/N)," you said gently. 

"Eren. I take it you're from our new batch, (F/N)?" Nodding, you motioned to the now buzzing hall. 

"There were a lot less people here yesterday. Have you guys just got back from a supply run?" It was his turn to nod now. 

"Yea. Nice to do something normal for a change." Unspoken words spilled into your mind, pictures of unbelievable destruction. Your demeanour changed, knowing that this boy (although he wouldn't thank you for calling him that) had witnessed incredible events and been a part of it too. His mind betrayed him as you comfortably continued. 

"It must be hard, Eren." That's all you had to say and he looked at you, eyes glazed and slightly moist as your hands stayed connected, not in a greeting any more. He looked down at his half eaten breakfast and mumbled. 

"No one understands, (F/N), no one. I don't know how I got like this and everyone's relying on me to do what must be done. But I'm not sure if I can." Images of a wall, a blonde giant, lost comrades, sheer terror mixed with defiance, friends and ability. Without doubt, you knew he was the titan shifter you'd been vaguely told about. The poor kid was so unsure of his actions, so isolated that you thought back to Chase and Helena, how they looked peering over the blanket at Levi's place. No, you corrected yourself, Isabel and Farlan lived there too. That threatened a whole new thought process and you shelved it for later. Turning back to Eren, you smiled. 

"Listen to me. Some people can do things that others can't and the layman will never understand. You have a purpose. I won't patronize you to tell you it's a gift, because it's not. But it is who you are." You emphasised the last three words, trying to instil some confidence in him, feeling terrible pain for the kid.

He seemed bolstered, sitting taller and he thanked you for your kind words. "(F/N), I hope you don't mind me asking, but why are you here? Everyone has a reason. But you seem too kind natured for it all." His eyes were wide as he looked up at the older woman. That made you laugh, not so much outwardly, but the heart of this boy was too much for you to take. He reminded you of Isabel, so innocent but underneath was a river of power. With the memory of your friend pressing heavily on your heart, you considered an answer, the sounds of Alana still chewing now invading your ears. 

"Eren, its a long story. Trust me. But the only important thing is that I think I can help."

A few tables away, Levi sat drinking his usual tea, watching his subordinates stuff their faces like pigs. It disgusted him how rabid the human race became just over a small amount of meat. Looking around with disdain, his eyes saw something he wanted to stop. It had to stop. The shifter boy was holding your hand, looking into your eyes and hanging on your every word. He didn't like the closeness, the contact and above all, he still didn't know if he could trust Eren fully. Animal instinct kicked in; the need to protect without question was a feeling he hadn't been acquainted with in years, but it pulled at his soul. Within seconds he was by your side. 

"(L/N), my office, now. Yeager, go and clean the bathrooms. And I mean properly fucking clean them. None of that half assed shit or the punishment will be ten times worse, you understand, brat?" Alana surfaced from her food long enough to see the rage in the Captain's eyes. She had no idea what had just happened, but she knew you were in trouble, as was the boy who sat next to you. She waved, not knowing what else to do and slid your plate to hers once you'd left, bacon being attacked by her cutlery.

You followed Levi to his office, his steps full of importance as the door was swung open and he marched in, leaving you to close up. "Sit." He ordered you bluntly, moving round the desk to take his seat. His elbows rested on the pristine surface and pale fingers twined together as he watched you coldly from over his hands. The smell overwhelmed you slightly, a faint odour of tea mixing in with harsh chemicals. Sitting on the wooden chair, you shuffled uncomfortably under his piercing gaze. He seemed to be deep in thought and you waited for him to speak. 

"You need to stay away from that boy, (F/N). He's dangerous." Finding it hard to believe that the evidently distressed teen ever meant any harm, you began to counter Levi's request. 

"But I'm sure I'll be ok, he doesn't seem to..." Hands thumped in fists on the desk and you flinched back into the chair. Fire burned behind his eyes, pure anger. 

"Do not question my orders, recruit. You will do as I say. Now leave." Inwardly cringing at his harsh words, you rose from the seat and made your way to the door sullenly. You hadn't exactly been expecting a hug or anything, you weren't delusional, but it didn't change the fact that you had been shocked slightly by his anger. "Wait." Hand on the door knob, you froze but didn't turn. "It's good to see you again, (F/N)." Smiling, you opened the exit, back turned to him still. 

"You too, Levi."

There was a spring in your step as you tried to navigate your way down the halls to the main door. You still had no idea how he had ended up here, or where Isabel and Farlan were, but you guessed it would take Levi a while to build up to that story. Hell, it had taken years for him to say a full sentence to you so patience was definitely the key. Alana appeared from round a corner, pulling you from your thoughts. Bacon grease glistened on her chin, faint dots of fat splattered over her white shirt. You laughed heartily at the state of your friend and grabbed her hand, making for outside. 

"Are you in trouble (F/N)?" You shook your head.

"Nah, just some shit about holding his hand or something." The two of you ran out into the large outdoor exercise area, colleagues milling about and chatting to members of the 104th.

There was an air of calm. You figured that due to recent events, this was more of a time to step back and take stock of what had happened. It wasn't a matter of strength, but strategy. The exercises were intended to keep you sharp but also so your superiors could size you all up before choosing their squads. Looking over the crowd, you couldn't see Eren. He was probably still cleaning the bathrooms, the poor boy. Your protective nature had kicked in with him as you felt the turmoil that came from deep within. You'd have to try to keep any interactions away from Levi, though, not wanting to infuriate him again.

Erwin approached, followed by Hange, Levi and a squad leader you hadn't yet met but knew his name was Jacob. They stood as the recruits of the Survey Corps saluted them strongly and the Commander spoke to the gathered soldiers. 

"Today, new members will be carrying out an exercise with their manoeuvre gear." Excited whispers ran through those gathered. "We need to see how skilled you are when faced with adversity. 104th, you will be monitoring them and assisting us with evaluations. Squad Leader Hange will be passing instructions to you. Read them well. Good luck." The crazed woman was already amongst you, handing out the small leaflets. The more seasoned soldiers chatted amongst themselves, looking forward to watching the rookies and seeing how good you all were. 

One girl stood unmoved by the whole situation, though. Dark hair framed her face and a red scarf was wrapped tightly around her neck. She scanned over all of you, inwardly making observations and picking out who she thought might just live up to expectations. You looked down at the paper and read over the details - soldiers were to move through the forest with their gear and would encounter dummy titans along the way that had to be taken down. The catch was that people would also be trying to stop your progress. Hardly surprising, considering the recent clashes with the Military Police and such like. You were allowed to engage in combat with them, but no blades. Quickly, the small group ran to their rooms to get their equipment. There were only twelve of you, all skilled in the air. It was going to be fun.

Lining up at the starting position, determination shining in the dozen pairs of eyes, you breathed slowly and confidently. You knew you had a head start over the others due to Farlan's thorough schooling. Thinking of him again, your patience to hear the full story began to wear thin. Concentration kicked in as you pushed the face of your lost friend to the back of your mind and glanced to your audience. Hange looked like she might explode, hands bunched up at her cheeks and eyes full of what looked like hysteria. She was perhaps a little bit too excited, you thought. It was only a practice after all. 

Levi's face held his usual emotionless expression, looking over you all with displeasure. As his glare reached yours, you thought you'd seen a tiny nod, almost unnoticeable but you were sure it had happened. Like a good luck gesture. You showed no outward sign of acknowledgement but shot a thought his way, to say this was a piece of cake, you had been taught well. The grey, bored gaze moved down the line to Alana, noticing the bacon grease still stuck to her face with pure disgust. But something made him uneasy. When he had tried to pass a quiet message of luck with a nod to you, he could have sworn he heard you speak. It wasn't possible that you had, your lips never moved, but all the same he was sure he heard something about cake and Farlan. Thinking of his departed friends, he realised you had no idea what fate had befallen them. That would be a conversation he had to have with you soon. As unpleasant as it may be, you deserved to know.

The signal was fired and the newest members of the Survey Corps ran in unison towards the trees. You abandoned any thoughts of those around you and concentrated on the task at hand. Flying between the huge trunks and branches was exhilarating, sending a euphoric feeling of freedom through your whole being. A dummy titan came into view and you grasped your blades tightly, spinning round to connect both with the small weak spot made of foam. With skill, you navigated further into the forest, faint noises around to alert you to a presence.

You'd been told that those trying to stop your progress would be clad in black and you allowed yourself a sideways glance to see who was coming. A darkly clothed figure came towards you, placing themselves in positions to try and break your flight path. Swinging around their attempts, you turned your body mid air and gracefully brought your foot into the centre of their chest, winding them and stopping the pursuit. Grinning, you continued through the forest, taking down titans with ease and evading your would-be attackers.

Seeing light, you noticed that you were near the end of the course. Suddenly, a dark figure appeared in front of you again, taking you by surprise. Instinct kicked in and you took yourself to ground level, fighting stance in place before your feet had hit the leafy surface. Your assailant landed lightly and made their way towards you, face covered by a black cloth so you didn't know who it was. Defending blows, you adjusted to the height and weight of the person quickly and landed hit after hit, twirling out of their attempts like a dancer. The final punch was landed and you sent them crashing in to a tree, your fist connecting roughly with their jaw. Swiftly, you took to the air again and made your way across the finish line. You were the first, but Alana followed not far behind and then Jared. Catching your breaths, you slapped each other on the back in congratulations.

Once everyone had arrived, you waited in anticipation as the 104th soldiers spoke quietly to your superiors. You saw a few bloodied faces on your colleagues, evidence of the fights that had occurred in the forest. The worst off seemed to be Hersh, his mouse-like appearance and constant surprised expression made him look like a push over, but he was actually very capable. God knows who he had come across to be left in that state. 

You noted some of the observing soldiers seemed to be wincing and one had a purple bruise forming on his face. They must have been the attackers in the scenario, black clothes already removed from over their uniforms. The one with the bruise had a physique that matched who you'd fought and he didn't look too happy at having received an injury at the hands of a rookie. He was pointing at his jaw and complaining to those around him and then your heart froze as he shifted his accusing finger to point.

Eyes turned and most of the crowd was now looking right at you. Holding gazes defiantly, you felt no guilt - you were allowed to spar in the exercise after all, so you'd done nothing wrong. Your eyes sought out a pair of silver ones and saw faint amusement etched on Levi's face, lips slightly smirking and shards of mercury flashing with evil enjoyment. Perhaps a bit of pride too; he had taught you well. You couldn't help but smirk back, getting the distinct impression that the man who had been assaulted was a usual source of good natured ribbing at the hands of his comrades.

Reports had been given and your superiors now held discussions. Moving apart, Erwin turned to the dozen newcomers. "You all performed well today, congratulations. As I'm sure you are aware, the selections will be made soon to determine who you will be reporting to. When a decision is made, you'll be informed. Well done everyone, you can make your way back for lunch." 

Excited chatter rang out as you all returned and you realised how hungry you were after the physical exertion. You were aware that the light haired man you'd hit had come closer and heard faint silvery words once more, things like payback, embarrassing, runt, and attractive. The last one was unexpected and you closed your mind off, concentrating on thoughts of food.


	3. Revelations

"Alright, alright, lets just calm down, ok?" Erwin held his hand up to cool the mood in the room. Hange and Levi were staring each other down, the man leaning over the desk to place his furious face close to hers. His eyes drilled holes into her as he spat. 

"Fuck off shitty glasses. No way. Not on my watch." She laughed, causing the Captain to become even angrier, something those gathered didn't think would have been possible. Jacob smiled as he sat in his chair, arms folded, watching the spiralling fight. 

"Oh shorty, you're so silly, of course you want everyone on your precious squad but you can't have all the toys, you know. You have to share." She spoke to him like an adult scolding a child and the irate male opened his mouth to rip her to pieces with words, finger pointing at her face. Before he could continue, Erwin interjected again.

"Right we obviously have a difference of opinions here," Levi scoffed at the comment. "But we have to come to an agreement. I will make the decision, and you will abide by it. Am I clear?" Hange leant back, sulking as her adversary stood, smoothing out his clothes and grunted an affirmation. The large blonde sighed. "I'll take that as a yes, Levi. Ok. Jacob, your selections have been noted and you can have your squad as desired." The one addressed looked smugly at his peers. "You two," continued Erwin, motioning to the still seething officers. "Hange, you take (F/N), Levi take Jared. The other selections can remain as they were." This seemed to placate them sufficiently and they left the room to leave their superior to the relevant paperwork.

Jacob laughed evilly. "You guys are like a divorcing couple fighting over the furniture. You're cute." Levi had him against the wall in under a second, staring into his eyes, wondering what the most painful death would be for the constantly joking squad leader. It didn't have the desired effect as the shit eating grin remained on his face, taunting. Hange pulled the shorter man away to diffuse the situation, shaking her head. 

"Don't touch me again, you freak." He growled at her deeply, scowling before stalking off. 

"You love me really!" The woman called cheerfully after him and got the middle finger in return.

Slamming his door, Levi wasn't really sure why he had gotten so worked up. Jared had been an easy choice, knowing that he would be able to turn the young man into a dependable first class soldier in no time. But (F/N). It bothered him that you weren't going to be in his squad, but there wasn't a solid reason as to why.

~~~~~~

Lunch passed by quickly and you'd discovered the guy you had bruised was called Jean, tall male teased about it the whole way through the meal. Shooting daggers with his eyes from across the hall, you decided to pretend that you hadn't seen his stare, carrying on with your own conversations. The absence of the superiors had been noted by everyone, meaning they were huddled away somewhere to select their squads. You didn't actually mind whose you made it onto, they were all competent and deserving of the position and you were sure that you would be able to make them proud. That and the fact that you would all still be working closely together.

A cry was heard from across the room and you saw Hersh running frantically over to everyone, his constant shocked face looking comically dramatic. "The names are up, there's a list on the wall!" So this was it, you would find out now. It was exciting. The twelve that were affected by the choice ran over to the list, followed by some of the 104th who were curious to see how the selections went. Scanning your eyes over the paper, you saw that you and Hersh had been placed in Hange's squad, Jared in Levi's, and Alana in Jacob's. Your trio being split was a bit upsetting, but again you thought about how you would never be far apart. You began to wonder what your new leader would be like, thinking back to her maniacal behaviour this morning before the exercise. It would be interesting, you decided, and that was fine with you.

Jean stalked over to you, malice in his eyes. "Oh you're in for it now, (F/N)," he purred. "Hange is what you might call an eccentric. She's gonna have you doing all sorts of weird shit with her. Talking of that, you fancy doing some weird shit with me?" Gross. Just, no. If that was flirting, then humanity was in trouble. Calmly, you turned to the angry man and looked up into his light orbs. 

"Don't be upset, Jean. I'm sure you'll get to lose your virginity sooner or later. But the only thing I want to do with you is put as much distance between us at all times. Unless you want another bruise to match the one I gave you earlier?" A small crowd had gathered around, watching the stand off. Jared's grin flashed brightly; he hadn't seen you take someone down verbally for ages and it was always fun to watch. Hersh tugged at your sleeve, trying to get you to back down. Alana was running around gathering up stragglers and dragging them over. Your heart raced as anger bubbled up inside of you. Who did he think he was, making lewd suggestions? He didn't know you and you sure as hell wanted to keep it that way.

"I'm not a virgin, actually," he said, spitting the last word. "I've had loads of women. You don't know what you're missing (F/N). Anyway, you think you're so great? How many have you had?" Oh that was priceless. He really fucked up there, his choice of words making you smirk maliciously. 

"How many women have I had? Well let me see." You tapped your lip with a finger, looking deep in thought. "Not as many as the amount of men I've been with. So, I do know what I'm missing and Jean, I think I'll survive." You waggled your little finger at him suggestively. Laughter rang around the mess hall, his faced flushed bright red and you expertly dodged as he lunged. Before he could try again, strong arms grabbed him from behind and threw the tall man to the floor. Shocked gasps whistled through the vast room as Jean groaned in pain. Levi loomed over the fallen soldier, looking at him like he was a piece of shit on his shoe. He turned to glare in your direction and you straightened up officially. He raised his eyebrow and looked between the squabblers. 

"Both of you in my office. Now." He turned on his heel and quickly left. 

"Oh (F/N), not again!" whispered Alana. You shrugged and made your way to the Captain's office, creepy male close behind.

You didn't speak on the walk, not wanting to get riled up by the tall guy again. Announcing your presence, you entered and saluted, Jean mirroring your actions. Levi looked up with darkness on his face, thoroughly fed up with having to deal with this shit. 

"Ok, I'll keep it simple. Don't ever fucking behave like that again you stupid little shits." Replying in unison, "Yes Sir" was heard in the room. The one in charge did nothing at first, just glared at you both with disgust. When he spoke, he sounded downright bored. 

"You," he pointed at Jean, "I want every window in this fucking place cleaned. Twice. Go." The still blushing male saluted and left, leaving the two of you alone. Levi pointed at the chair and you sat in front of him for the second time today. He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "What the fuck, (F/N)? You're better than that, when did you become such an idiot?" Annoyance lacing your words, you responded to his stupid question. 

"I'm not an idiot Levi, I just had to get good at defending myself." He shook his head. 

"Just don't fuck about again. The stables need cleaning. Those fucking horses shit too much." The order was stated deadpan, no room for argument and you nodded, getting up to leave. Before you could reach the door, Levi was in front of you. Damn his teleportation-like speed. He looked troubled. "(F/N), there's something I have to tell you. Something you need to hear." This sounded serious. What bothered you even more was the look on his face. Pain was etched across his usually expressionless features. "Farlan and Isabel are dead." All the blood seemed to drain from your upper body, retreating to gather somewhere in your stomach, his words ringing in your ears like a bomb had exploded next to you. 

It felt like that day on the roof as you watched your friends being taken away. Legs refused to support you anymore, but before you could fall, Levi grabbed an arm to provide steadiness. Tears fell silently from your pained eyes. 

"How?" 

"Titans." You didn't need details, that was all you had to know. Sobs took over your body, sending painful hitches through your chest and as you grieved, Levi's arms wrapped tightly around your figure, holding you while you let it all out. It was an unusual action for him to take, but this wasn't just some random cadet sniffling in front of him about a sore toe or something. This was someone who meant much more and his own sorrow at losing the two friends surfaced, along with his guilt at not being able to save them.

You eventually pulled yourself together, determination in your eyes once more - you would be strong for them, fight for your lost comrades. Grey discs looked at you with concern. 

"How did you end up here, Levi?" He sighed at the question and motioned for you to sit once more, recounting the story with a stony expression, no emotion shown as he explained the man who approached him, the death of your friends and the choice he made. You nodded, finally caught up on the mystery that had been gnawing at you. 

"And how about you, (F/N)? I really didn't fucking expect you to be stood in front of me yesterday." Shrugging, you simply stated the truth.

"There was nothing left for me down there." Accepting your reasons, he sat a moment before returning to his standard behaviour seamlessly. 

"Those stables won't clean themselves, brat." Smiling lightly, you bid farewell and made your way down to carry out your punishment.

Brushing the horses down with care, you paid attention to the places that caused them discomfort. At least you had company here, chatting away to the beasts; it took your mind off the empty feeling of loss. A noise made you look up and you saw you had been joined, a boy watching you with curiosity. "Hey Eren," you smiled. "Finished cleaning?" He laughed without humour. 

"Yea, thankfully. What did you do?" He gestured at the now sparkling stalls. 

"Fought with Jean." His eyes lit up at the revelation and he laughed for real. 

"No way! That's brilliant, (F/N). The guy is an idiot." Nodding in agreement, you muttered softly. 

"He certainly is." Silence descended as the horse nudged you with its head, reminding you that you were in the middle of its brush down. "Oops, sorry." You continued your work, sensing that Eren was shifting uncomfortably on the spot. "Its ok, whatever it is, you can ask." He gathered himself. 

"I-I heard that you were from the underground, (F/N). Was it awful down there?" Smiling you kept your eyes on the brown mare in front of you. 

"After all the terrible things you've seen Eren, the underground is a walk in the park." He frowned and a spark of indignation flared up in his green eyes, ready to take on a non-existent foe.

"How do you know what I've seen?" You shook your head. 

"I just do. And anyway, I'm not from the underground, I just ended up there." He decided not to press the matter and remained quiet, wondering what the hell was up with this woman. Sighing, you started to gather your equipment. "Eren you'd better go. Levi will be checking on me soon, no doubt. He's not too keen on us talking for some reason." 

~~~~~~

Jean had been right. Hange had you doing some seriously weird shit. Only a few weeks under her command and you had suffered a variety of injuries thanks to her crazy experiments. Some odd smelling liquid had exploded in your face, removing half your eyelashes. It took ages for them to grow back and you still looked a bit bald on your lids. Your arm had been bitten by what you thought was a mutated kind of frog. The list went on, but she was undeniably friendly, her eccentric nature infectious. These had only been some simple tests, but the big one was today. And you found that were actually a bit scared.

You were out in a large tree-lined field. Hersh and you were there, as were Levi, Mikasa and Hange, all in full gear. You'd been introduced to Mikasa a few days ago and the serious woman had eyed you suspiciously. She didn't like you being friendly with Eren, but you actually didn't give a shit. The object of her desire was present too and he stood in front of the small crowd, looking anxious. You tried to send him soothing thoughts, knowing that being the subject of a dangerous experiment must be daunting. 

Hange hurried around, making sure everyone was ready and aware of their parts in this. "We know what to do four eyes, just get on with it." Levi spoke with pure boredom and the slightly mad squad leader took a deep breath then turned to Eren. 

"Do your thing. We're going to try the building again, ok?" He nodded and you readied yourselves for his transformation at a safe distance. You had never seen anything like it and watched as the seemingly mentally fragile boy turned into a huge creature before your eyes. It was incredible. The instructions from Hange were loud as she asked Eren to construct a simple structure. He'd done it before, but she was hoping for a more sturdy building this time. Homes could be built and industry would boom if this could be perfected.

It seemed to be going well until Eren stopped listening and just sat down, staring. Hersh moved uncomfortably, looking to his superiors for some kind of order. "Eren? What's wrong?" Mikasa approached as everyone tensed and at that, he snapped. Screaming deeply into the sky, he reached for her and swatted his friend away like a fly. She managed to use her gear to avoid colliding with the hard ground and ended up in a large tree. You could see her wince; there was injury somewhere. 

It was all going to shit. Hange was screaming instructions at the boy's titan form, telling him it was over, he had to come out now. Mikasa clung wounded to the trunk. Hersh had fight in his eyes but you knew he was petrified. Levi's fingers twitched at his gear, ready to go at a second's notice. Time slowed down. Everything was muddy and sluggish and in slow motion, you saw Eren begin to reach for the black haired female, a tiny, almost imperceptible movement and you knew you had to stop it now. The Captain noticed too, but you were faster.

Using a force that you hadn't experienced since the day at the basement, you channelled every ounce of everything inside and soundlessly yelled to Eren, shouted at him to stop, it was going to be ok, but he had to stop right now. Please Eren. Stop.

Those around you had frozen, staring at what was happening before them. You seemed to crackle with electricity, an ethereal glow around your form as particles of dust shook at your feet in a low vibration. Looks of complete confusion gazed at you and then turned to Eren as he emerged slowly from the now grounded titan form. Hange ran to get him out of the steaming body, Levi raced to you while Hersh moved quickly through the air to assist Mikasa.

Not knowing if you'd even been successful, your eyes clouded over and nausea set in a the world tilted crazily and you hit the ground hard, shaking, head pounding. Levi didn't reach you in time to stop your fall, but arrived by your side in seconds, grabbing hold of your hands and calling your name. His voice sounded so far away, like it was at the end of a tunnel and you struggled to reach out to the sound. You saw his face, dark and concerned and then everything went black. The blindness had taken hold eyes and you couldn't move from the piercing pain in your head.

Mikasa had a deep laceration on her leg, luckily just a superficial wound and Eren was coming out from his dream-like state quickly. Your squad leader helped him along to where the pale man crouched over your trembling body. "What just happened here? What the hell did we just see?" Hange whispered, eyes glinting at the prospect of a new scientific find for her to play with. The others just stood staring down, no words seemed worth saying right now.

Your old friend leaned close, speaking quietly in your ear. "(F/N), can you hear me?" You nodded and instantly regretted it, skull exploding in agony. Levi tried a different tact, aware of your severe discomfort. "Alright, squeeze my hand once for yes, twice for no. Understand?" One squeeze. "Are you blind?" Yes. "You did this before, didn't you. At the basement?" Yes. "You saved me." Yes. He breathed out with a slight shake. "(F/N), are you in pain?" YES. Big squeeze. 

He turned to the rest of the experiment group. "Lets get back. Three of you need medical attention." He spoke harshly and noticed the manic behaviour in one particular person, her hands wringing, glee in her gaze and he snarled lowly to her. "Don't even fucking think about it." She looked hurt, but thousands of thoughts continued to run through her mind. Once again, you were picked up with care and taken to safety. You clung on tightly and felt yourself being laid gently on the cart you had travelled here in. Sensing closeness, you figured Eren was laid next to you and a blanket was placed over you both. A few thumps and clunks and the trip home began.

By the time you reached the headquarters, your vision had begun to return and the small team pulled in, able bodied members of the group aiding the injured. Levi moved to pick you up again and you waved him away. "I'm ok, I think I can walk." You slid off the cart and your legs gave way, shaking like jelly. A strong grip around your waist stopped you hitting the ground and you put your arm around strong shoulders, apologising. "Sorry, I hate being weak." 

"Tch. Shut up."

Moving slowly to the doors, the sorry sight of six people was met by gasps and cries from the cadets getting ready to go in for dinner. You made out a blurry shape approaching, only knowing who it was by the voice. It moved for Eren. "I swear to god, if you've hurt them I'll…" Jean. Of course. He was stopped in his path by an arm across his chest. 

"Step back Kirstein or I'll smash your fucking nose in." Levi didn't break his pace or even look at the angry young man, just continued in the direction of the medical rooms. A blob ran towards you, Alana. 

"Oh my god (F/N), what happened, are you ok?" She sounded close to tears and you put on a brave smile.

"I'll be fine, don't worry. Honest." She looked at the Captain for confirmation and he nodded curtly. 

"Be well, (F/N)." The concerned voice called after you as the journey carried on. You were carefully placed on a bed, shapes fussing around as hushed conversations were held. Turning to what you presumed was Eren, you heard his tired voice. 

"Thanks." You held a thumb up in his direction, too frail to do much more. 

"Oi brat, leave her alone and concentrate on getting yourself back to normal." Despite his harsh tone, the words let you know that Levi cared about the boy's welfare, even if he would never admit to it. Mikasa's wound had been cleaned and dressed and she went to her friend's side. Glasses appeared in your fuzzy line of vision, Hange's conspiring tone coming from the figure. 

"(F/N), once you're well, we will talk." You thought you saw her wink as she was ushered out of the room by an angry male. His dark hair was in front of you now, but you couldn't see any kind of features to gauge his emotion. Thinking to the near future, you asked an important question, one which would span both of your previous lives. 

"How much should I tell Erwin?" Levi thought about his answer and gave it bluntly. 

"All of it." A hand squeezed your shoulder. "I'll check on you later. Rest now." He left, taking a reluctant Mikasa with him. You were exhausted and quickly fell into a troubled sleep.

~~~~~~

Bright (e/c) eyes snapped open, vision restored. It must have been late as a lamp burned on a table near by and it was pitch black outside, rumble of thunder in the distance. Turning, you saw Eren's bed was empty. He must be ok now, that's good. Sighing with effort, you tried to sit up and a palm pushed you gently back down. "Don't even fucking dare." As ordered, you lay down again, spots flashing in front of your eyes from the movement, confirming that he was right to make you stay in bed. You dragged your hand over your eyes and breathed out shakily. "You going to tell me what the fuck is going on or what?" You'd expected this and you owed him of all people an explanation. 

"Can I at least sit up with a pillow behind me, Levi? Its weird talking to a disembodied voice." You heard a rustle and were scooped up onto extra padding. "See, now we can hold a normal conversation."

"Whatever. Just talk. Now." Hearing the impatience in his drawl, you began, explaining the reason for your parents abandoning you and how you used to be overwhelmed by images and sounds in your head that weren't yours. You had no support in dealing with your ability, simply had to get used to it alone. At first it was uncontrollable, people's thoughts appearing in your mind without permission, always preceded by a nauseous feeling. You trained yourself to stop them by digging your nails into your palms, the pain acting as a distraction. But you had also discovered you could invade other people's brains, leave words unspoken in their heads. And you could see dreams. That one could be quite fun at times, especially with Alana. 

Not everyone was easily read and you had difficulty with a minority of people, those with the strongest personas and you shot Levi a meaningful look as you imparted that knowledge. Your skill had been useful when planning to steal from people, using it to find out where they would be at a certain time or what they had on them. You recounted the story of the tailors and pointed out that you were pleasantly surprised to see he still wore a cravat.

Moving on, you told him that the night he saved you was an anomaly - you had never actually influenced anyone's actions before, never tried, but the sheer urgency of the situation had made you do it without realising. Obviously the repercussions of your actions were severe, more so this time and you guessed it was because of the difficulty in finding the real Eren inside the titan body, trying to get through to his already fading thought control.

Levi sat quietly for a moment, considering all you had told him. "You know Hange will want to fucking prod and poke you until you want to stab her in the eyes, don't you?" Giggling, you clutched your head instantly. 

"Don't make me fucking laugh, Levi!" Facing him, you became solemn. "I'm sorry I never told you. Its not the easiest thing to admit to anyone, in fact you're the first person I've ever confided in." He gripped your shoulder once more, looking you straight in the eyes. 

"Thank you." It referred to the basement all those years ago and you smiled, hand on his, happy to have your friend at your side again.

~~~~~~

The office was quiet as you finished your story, Erwin, Hange, Jacob, Levi and Eren in attendance. 

"So…" began Hange. "Were you ever going to tell us that you knew each other?" You shrugged in your chair and the other involved spoke from behind her, leaning against the wall casually. 

"Why should we have? None of your fucking business." Only you and Eren faced the stoic man, superiors were all in front of you and the one who spoke was at the back of the group. They missed the small smirk that danced on his lips at how much that last comment enraged the slightly crazy squad leader. 

"So you were like, lovers then?" Before you could put up a protest, he grumbled once more. 

"Like I said, none of your fucking business" He said it in a bored tone but the smirk grew; he was revelling in the bespectacled woman's need for gossip. You kept your cool and made sure not to make any sign of emotion, staring blankly at Hange's open mouth and wide eyes, playing along with your friend's game. She gulped for air, trying to think of something to say,when Jacob cleared his throat. 

"I guess that explains your hand to hand combat skills, (F/N). You learnt from the best." He motioned to Levi with his thumb. Again, not allowing you to say a word, a monotone voice cut in. 

"No, she wasn't half as good as she is now." Pride swelled in your heart and you shot him a look of thanks. It was met with the same sarcastic smile and a cold, emotionless gaze that held a faint flash of recognition that only you would have noticed.

Erwin returned the conversation to the main point, asking Eren what he had felt. Eyes shifted to him, and you were curious to know the answer too. Poor kid, caught up in all this attempt to garner lewd information. He had turned bright red and had a hard time dragging his mind from the prospect of you and Levi as an item. Once he gathered himself together, he explained to the room. 

"It was a loud voice, not shouting, just..." He searched for words. "I had to obey. I couldn't ignore it. I knew it was (F/N). But even if I hadn't, I would have followed the orders." Everyone sat in silence until the Commander broke it. 

"We have a lot to think about here. It's late and some of you haven't eaten." He looked particularly to you and Eren. "Go, get some food and then rest. We can pick this up tomorrow with fresh minds."

The meeting over, you shuffled slowly to the mess hall, still feeling delicate. No one was there apart from you and the others that had come in search of sustenance. Four of you sat down, dry bread and some cheese making up your grand dinner. Hungrily, you, Eren and Hange attacked the food, not having realised how empty your stomachs were. Levi sipped on his tea. 

"(F/N)?" Hange spoke through a mouthful, earning a disgusted look from the drinker. "What was shorty like down there?" She hadn't actually meant for it to come acros as innuendo, but nonetheless, it was out in the open. Levi's cup was delicately placed on the table and he looked at her with mild interest, brow slightly raised. You choked on your bread and again, Eren turned beetroot in colour and stared at the floor. Realising her faux pas, she clapped a hand to her mouth as giggles shook her body, eyes squeezed shut. Looking up at Levi, you were met with the small smile that he had worn during the recent meeting and you shook your head, grinning widely at your Squad Leader's error, feeling lifted by the humour and fun you were surrounded by.


	4. Under Attack

The next day you awoke to bright sunshine, the storms of last night washed away. The orange ball of light looked high up in the sky and you realised you had slept late. It wasn't surprising, given the events of yesterday. Seeing as you hadn't been woken by anyone, you presumed it had been allowed and you weren't in any trouble. The remains of a headache lingered around your temples, but you felt ten times better than you had before as you hurried to get ready. Last night's dinner had been pathetic and you were ravenous. Pulling clothes on, you thought about how the long day had ended, in laughter and blushes. Hange had begun picking at you and Levi for information, but she got nothing from either of you. Let her stew for a bit, you thought with mischief. It could be fun.

Entering the hall, your eyes searched the crowd until they found Alana and Jared. Running over, you grabbed your best friend in a warm embrace. "(F/N) we were so worried about you," she said into your hair. "Are you ok? What the fuck happened?" You broke the hug, and smiled to them both. 

"I'm fine, totally fine. I just got knocked out during the experiment, it's all good. Everyone's alright." You didn't like keeping the truth from your friends, but you had been sworn to secrecy, all of you. It was understandable. This signalled unknown territory for the Corps and no one knew what any next steps would be, but it was to be kept under wraps for now.

After you had grabbed some food, you sat with the two once more, chatting about what they had been up to and how it was all going. Jared grumbled darkly. "I swear, all I do is clean, that guy has a serious problem." You smiled, nodding at his gripe about the newly appointed leader. 

"He has indeed," you said, recalling the stable duty. Eren walked past your table and gave you a huge grin, waving. You waved back and dark eyes pinned you down in place with a warning. 

"Oooooh (F/N), that Mikasa really doesn't like you, does she?" whispered Alana. Grunting with apathy, you watched as the dark haired girl ushered the boy over to a far away table. "She's protective, I get it, but she needs to stop smothering him." Your friend's words made you think back to how Eren in his titan form had lashed out at her, perhaps showing his true feelings in the unhinged state.

Tugged from your thoughts, a voice spoke urgently. "Hange is ready for you, (F/N)." You looked up to see Hersh eyeing you with suspicion. He kept a noticeable distance - maybe what he saw yesterday had been a bit too much for him? But it wasn't just that. There was something else there, something darker. Malice, evil intent, distrust. And opportunity. You frowned as you wondered just what the quiet man was all about, what he was planning. It troubled you, but you had more important tasks at hand and shelved your concerns for a later date. Smiling to your friends, you made your way to your squad leader's office.

Erwin, Levi and Jacob were already there. This didn't concern Eren so the group was reduced to you and your superiors. Hange was pacing with excitement and grabbed you through the door when you arrived. Her eyes glowed crazily as she chattered incessantly. "Now, you can do it with people and horses, so I've heard and Eren in his titan form but was that because he is a coherent human in there? Will it work on ordinary titans? We must find out, (F/N), it could be the breakthrough we need. Eren gave the titans orders once but what if you could change their behaviour? We have to take you outside the walls…" 

She was cut off mid rant by a low, cold voice. "Not a fucking chance, piss off." Hange turned to him, a smile on her face. 

"Look, I know you want to protect your girlfriend or whatever, but..." Again she was halted in her tracks. 

"I said no, shitty glasses. And we can stop all that fucking nonsense about girlfriends." Levi's voice was filled with anger as he turned to lean back against the wall, frown firmly on his face. Your squad leader looked at you with curiosity. Might as well let her down gently. 

"We weren't lovers Hange, just friends," you explained. "Sorry to burst your bubble." She looked broken, her only piece of gossip to cling to had been torn away. Once more, Erwin brought the meeting back to reality, clearing his throat.

"I agree, an outside excursion is too dangerous for now. We need to investigate (F/N)'s abilities inside the protection of the HQ. Remember, there are still those out there that would wish harm on the Survey Corps." The room considered the Commander's words. Hange looked disappointed on so many levels, but nodded. Indoor experiments would have to do for now. Jacob moved close, concern on his usually light features. 

"Are you sure you're up to all of this? You didn't look good at all last night." All eyes were on you at that moment and you tried to lighten the building atmosphere. 

"Thanks for that Jacob, you're not exactly the picture of beauty yourself." Hange snorted a small laugh and even Erwin smirked slightly. Levi remained against the wall, expression unmoving. "And yes, I'm up to it. It's a controlled environment and if I push too hard, I can get the attention I need straight away." The superiors seemed satisfied and talk turned to planning.

Meeting finally over, you walked back to the mess hall. It was evening already and time to eat once more. You thought about how your life revolved so much around food as your stomach growled. Footsteps approached from behind and Levi caught up to you, walking to the canteen together in silence. The issue that had been pushed to the back of your mind surfaced once more and you spoke in low tones. 

"I don't trust Hersh." A hand grabbed your elbow and led you quickly into a nearby supply closet, door shut tightly. The tiny space was illuminated by one of the newly created lamps and serious orbs looked at you.

"Why." It wasn't a question, it was an order. 

"There are some dark thoughts in his head. I assumed it was from a fear of me, of what I can do. But it's so much more than that. He's planning something and whatever it is, it's not good. He won't come close enough for me to get anything else." Levi looked deep in thought. Finally he broke the silence. 

"We'll keep an eye on him." You left the cupboard and the timing could not have been worse. Hange happened to be walking past just as the two of you stepped out from hiding. Wide eyed, she pointed at you, mouth open. 

"Fuck sakes." The man muttered and marched off, leaving you to shrug and follow after him, smiling and shaking your head as you heard choking noises from the brunette.

~~~~~~

"So I don't know how much I'll see of you guys." You sighed, having just explained that you were going to be holed up in the lab for the foreseeable future and Jared spoke to you with mock pity. 

"Ah no, (F/N), just when your eyelashes were starting to look normal." Your hands shot up self consciously to your face and Alana smacked the man on the arm. After dinner, you made your way to your room, knowing you would be needing plenty rest for whatever Hange had in store.

~~~~~~

Days of random experiments faded into each other and you were exhausted. It turned out you couldn't read amphibians, with you keeping a sensible distance from the frogs. Given how the last one treated you, a few steps away was close enough. You had made Hange obey your commands a few times, sending her dancing around the lab on one occasion. Your blindness and pain seemed to take less time to dissipate as you pressed forward, intent on honing your skills. The other three superiors visited now and again, checking on progress and that you were ok and the excitable woman continued to press you for inside info on Levi's past but you remained tight lipped, much to her displeasure. She kept detailed notes of each task and was building a solid case for testing it all out on titans.

One afternoon, the two of you had been out for some fresh air, the lab having no windows as it was placed in the centre of the building. Your eyes had burned in the sunshine, unaccustomed to the bright light that had shone down on you. Both of you were paler and dark circles framed your bottom lids, but you had to move on, the importance of this was too immense to take it easy. Walking back to the lab, you chatted lightly about how you would both be turning into vampires at this rate, until you saw a figure scurrying away round a corner at the end of the hall. Your senses were on edge and something told you that trouble was close.

Entering the room, Hange froze. "Where are my notes? They were here?" she said with rising panic. You had shared your concerns about Hersh with her a few days ago, but you hadn't seen him in ages. You presumed Levi had something to do with that as he was looking after the other members of your squad while Hange was busy with you. "I always leave them here, I know it looks like chaos but I am aware of where everything is at all times." With growing unease, you mentioned the figure you'd seen running off. "You don't think it was him, do you?" she asked, moving through the lab.

You saw her stumble on something and the next thing you knew, an explosion rocked the room and you were thrown to the floor. Ears ringing with a high pitched whine, you tried to find your squad leader but the smoke in the lab was so thick it was impossible to see. You screamed her name, however couldn't even hear your own voice. Carefully, you got up on shaking hands and knees and crawled over broken equipment, charred papers and smashed vials of chemicals to try to locate the older woman. Your hands found what felt like a leg and you hurried across to her side. She lay prone on the floor, a nasty looking head wound oozing blood. Her chest still rose in a healthy rhythm, she was alive, thank fuck, and you tore a piece of cloth from your shirt to press it against her head, stopping the flow of red liquid from the injury.

Levi's eyes widened as he heard a loud bang and the floor shook beneath his feet. Cadets froze in place, confusion on their faces, cleaning equipment dropping from their hands. Without hesitation, the Captain ran in the direction of the lab, instinctively knowing the source of the explosion. Frantic, he moved at an unnatural pace, pushing terrified people out of his way as his legs pumped with pure adrenaline. As he ran, he remembered that Hersh had left the cleaning crew earlier to go take a shit or something and he cursed himself at not making a note of his return.

Turning the final corner, he was met by dirty dark clouds of soot and the door was on the other side of the hallway, twisted into a strange shape. His eyes scanned the room from the threshold and saw two shadowy figures on the floor. Rushing over, he was on his knees in seconds, hands searching through the smoke that enveloped the scene and finding an arm. He pulled it closer to see of it was you or Hange that was still upright. Meeting your (e/c) flashes, he sighed loudly in relief, unaware that he had been holding his breath and turned to the other woman, a wound to her head that you had done your best to take care of. Levi checked her pulse, noting it was strong and she was muttering something, tossing her head back and forth in what seemed to be a troubled dream. His hand still gripped your limb as slits of silver looked back to you again, checking your body over for any injuries as the fog began to clear. You had a few cuts on your hands and knees from crawling over the floor, but other than that you were unscathed, just covered in a dusting of black.

Voices entered the lab and Levi shouted them over to where you all were. Jared and Jean moved quickly to lift Hange, carrying her carefully out and in the direction of the medical units. Luckily, you were able to walk free, stepping round larger pieces of rubble and equipment and Erwin appeared in front of you, worry etched on his face and questions in his mind. They would have to wait though and the three of you followed quickly behind the men transporting the older female. Before leaving, the Commander had ordered Mikasa and Eren, who'd been close by, to stand guard outside the room.

~~~~~~

"Has anyone seen Hersh since?" Stares looked back with regret at the one in charge, heads shaking. A hand was brought down on to wood, surface slapped hard, a rare look of anger crossing the blonde's face. Jean knocked and entered at Erwin's growled command and as he glanced down at you, his eyes told you everything you needed to know. Hersh had gone. Fuck.

Jean began to explain. "Some soldiers saw him running to the stables with a book under his arm just before the explosion, Sir. In the confusion, no one noticed him leave but a horse is missing." Uneasy silence filled the room. Levi stood in his usual position against the wall, eyes burning with blood lust. Jacob was looking out the window and you stood in front of Erwin's desk. Hange was still recovering in medical, but would be fine; she'd received stitches and was suffering the after effects of concussion. The large seated man looked back up to Jean. 

"Kirstein, round up your colleagues and get out there. Let's find this son of a bitch." The youngest and newest member of this circle saluted and ran from the impromptu meeting, murder in his mind. "Jacob, go with them." The squad leader nodded and hurried out.

Sighing, you looked between the two men that remained. "What the fuck does he want with Hange's notes? He tried to take us out, I understand that, but the notes?" Levi considered the question, darkness hanging over his thoughts. 

"I have no fucking idea, (F/N). He can't be working alone though, he's too much of a little shit to have thought this up on his own." He began to pace the office and stopped suddenly in front of you, speaking while staring out the window, expressionless. "You're in danger. Whoever these fucks are, they will be after you and your ability." The thought of that sent fear through your body. If they were prepared to plant someone in the Corps, go through all the training and selection, they must mean business. Erwin nodded solemnly and gave another order, one which made little sense at first. 

"Levi, take care of it." The Captain tutted curtly and led you out of the office. 

"Where are we going?" You were confused and wanted answers. Now. 

"Tch, shut up brat and just come with me." You pouted, but allowed yourself to be taken down the corridors to your room. Standing there, you looked at Levi for some sort of explanation. "Get your shit together." Making no argument, you gathered your few belongings and stuffed them unceremoniously into a bag. Taking a final look around to check for any missed items, you stepped through the door and awaited the next order. He grabbed your arm and swept you down more corridors, up some stairs and when you realised where you were going, you looked over at him.

"Really?" He just uttered one word in reply to your query with a snarl and opened the door to his quarters. 

"In." You let out an angry breath, getting tired of his asshole behaviour and earned yourself a slap on the back of the head. Turning, eyes filled with fury, you watched him close the door and eventually face you.

"Just what the fuck did you do that for?!" 

"You aggravate me sometimes, (F/N)." He said it calmly and without expression. Well, that was rich coming from him. Stalking closer, you raised a finger, pointing. 

"Don't bitch at me Levi, I'm getting fed up of this shit, I don't need to…" Your words were cut off as you were thrown against the wall next to the door, hands pinned by your wrists at head height, his face centimetres from yours. Despite his actions, the features before you showed no anger, no effort as he held you strongly in place. It was useless to try struggling, you knew it would be to no avail, so you stood staring into his bored gaze.

"Don't push me (F/N), I'm pissed enough as it is," he growled. "I'm going to be by your side every minute of the fucking day until we sort this out and I don't need you whining at me." You smirked, a gesture without any humour. 

"Does my presence offend you that much, Levi?" You were whispering, never breaking your stare away from his. "And there was me thinking that you might have cared, even if just a little tiny bit about my safety. I must have been mistaken, but I was sure I heard concern in your voice out on the field that day." He said nothing, didn't move a muscle. You were on a roll, so continued in the same venomous tone. "Or was it just bullshit? Do you really not give a fuck about someone you've been through so much with?" That did it. A flash of silver across his orbs, grip reducing slightly in intensity. Sorrow. Apologies. Regret. Something else you couldn't put your finger on. 

The smirk disappeared from your lips as you saw how the simple words had hit him, breaking his barrier down to be easily read. His nose almost touched yours as you stood together, glares locked. You saw his grey hues flick down almost imperceptibly to your lips and back up, heart rate increasing. What the fuck? That's never happened with him before, that all too familiar feeling shooting through your body. Before you could do anything more, a heavy hand pounded at the door. 

Levi didn't move at first, his gaze held you in place and his lip pulled up in the corner as a smug smirk appeared. "You have no idea how much of a fuck I give about you, (F/N)." Speaking quietly with an animalistic tone to his low voice, emphasis was placed on the expletive. Blinking, he released you and opened the door with his usual bastard expression plastered across his face. You leant against the wall, finally breathing, having been holding it in since you last spoke and tried to gather yourself together.

Hushed voices spoke and footsteps retreated back down the hallway. A tilted head leant round the door to address where you stood. "They found Hersh."


	5. Outside

You arrived at Erwin's office, slightly breathless from running and a small blush on your face due to the moment you shared with Levi minutes before, getting to the doorway just in time to see Jean throwing Hersh to the floor. The tall man bent to secure the traitor's wrists and straightened, giving the person on his knees a kick in the ribs. You heard a crack and the young male wiped the back of a hand across his mouth and you saw blood. Hersh must have put up a fight. 

"Well done, Jean. Come back in an hour for debrief." Erwin spoke quietly, eyes never leaving the guy on the ground. The clear winner in the scuffle saluted strongly and turned to leave, catching your eye. He nodded and you reached for his arm as he passed, stopping him. 

"Thank you." Squeezing lightly, you smiled in gratitude and be grinned back, marching away that bit more tall from your appreciative touch.

Following Levi, you entered the room and slammed the door behind you, looking at Hersh with disgust. Erwin glanced at the pale man and nodded once, silent command given. Pure hate burned in the Captain's eyes as he circled the captive on the floor. 

"You piece of shit." Levi's blows hit hard and fast, punches and kicks sending blood splatters across the office. The blonde held his hand up and the beating stopped. You expected the culprit to be defiant, but he looked wretched, obviously just some tiny foot soldier in whatever this was. Sobbing, he pleaded for them to take pity - that only earned him a kick in the teeth from the seething dark haired male. Spitting red liquid, the traitor started talking before he got hit again.

"We're Alchemists," he panted. You froze and Levi's pacing stopped. Only Erwin looked confused. Walking round to face Hersh, you stared down at his bloodied face. 

"You've got to be kidding me? I thought you lot died out years ago?" The imprisoned man shook his head swiftly. 

"There's a small group of us left and it's our duty to eliminate all those with accidental abilities." You snorted. That explained some things, but you weren't too keen on being called 'accidental'. Levi's foot connected with the guy's already swolen face once more, obviously unimpressed with the man's revelation. "Wait, wait, please!" Hersh spoke thickly, moist mouth filled with fluid. "I don't know much, only that no pure Alchemists are left. The prophecy says that once all residuals are taken care of, true Alchemy can return again. You're the last one." A foot kicked his face again, but this time it was yours and teeth clattered to the floor.

"Residuals?" Is that all I am to you people? I didn't ask for this shit and now you come along trying to eliminate me? As for your stupid prophecy, that's nothing but a fucking fairy tale. You lot should have stayed beneath your rocks in the underground where you belong." You pulled your arm back, fist clenched and ready to strike again, but before you could, Levi grabbed your hand, stopping the swing. Surprised, you turned to him. His piercing gaze remained on Hersh as he spoke. 

"He's not worth the effort (F/N), he doesn't know shit." The murderous stare in the Captain's eyes spurred the traitor on to speak once more. 

"I know where the leader is and I know how you can stop him!" Silence descended upon the office. You really wanted to hit him again, but a grip was still holding your hand up and Erwin's loud voice broke through the quiet. 

"Tell us everything. Now."

~~~~~~

Hersh had been safely detained in the dungeon, guards on constant watch. Jean had provided his report to the Commander on how he found the man hiding scared behind a tree - a fight broke out but obviously, the light haired male had been victorious. The words of the Alchemist rang through your head as you sat on the couch in Levi's quarters, occupant bringing black tea for you both and he appeared by your side on the seat. Worry gnawed at his strained body as he played the options for action over and over in his mind, none of them being ideal. 

Sipping his drink, he looked over to you, your features dark and somewhat sinister in the glow of the lamp. You spoke suddenly. 

"You know what I have to do, Levi. Others have been injured enough through all this, no one else needs to get involved." You and your damn stubbornness.

"Tch, shut up you shit. I'm helping you take down this sorry fucking group of assholes. No arguments." He added the last part as he saw your mouth open to protest, so you sipped and nodded. 

"Ok. Just don't piss me off, Levi." He elbowed you sharply in the ribs as a response, causing you to laugh, a gesture that turned into a badly concealed yawn. 

"Time to sleep, you take the bed, I'm fine here." Again there was no room for negotiation. Rising, you thanked your friend and wished him a good night.

Levi stayed sat on the couch, thoughts turning to what the fucking traitor had said and the steps you had to take to end this. There were three like Hersh, all useless drones, easily eliminated. The leader, Alfonz, was going to be harder to get rid of. He had apparently been bestowed with a certain amount of power by the last pure Alchemist and could only be killed by a residual in the possession of a certain item. Obsidian stone, to be precise and it could only be found outside the walls, hence why it had not already been found and destroyed. It all sounded a bit far fetched but since he had seen what you were capable of, he was willing to go with it.

It meant the two of you travelling outside the walls to obtain the stone, trying not to get eaten by titans and returning to find Alfonz and take him down. The tired man sighed, wishing it was something he could do alone, but he knew that you had to work together in secrecy to not alert the evidently watching group. Hersh had offered no explanation as to how you had come to possess your powers, he didn't have a fucking clue. This was going to be messy, he thought as a delicate sip of tea was taken.

~~~~~~

Erwin stood in front of the entire Survey Corps that had assembled outside in the training grounds. This morning was intended as rumour control. Hange was present, bandage around her head. Standing in the crowd, you watched her, happy to see the woman looking seemingly ok. Alana stood next to you and grabbed for your hand. Looking round, you saw a scared expression on her face. "What's going on, (F/N)? This seems bad." You squeezed back, trying to calm her as the Commander held his remaining arm up, asking for quiet.

"You will all be aware of the explosion in the lab yesterday." Your friend gripped tightly, knowing how close you two had been to serious injury. "Everyone is alright and no fatalities occurred," he continued steadily. "However. It has only made it more clear than ever that we have enemies other than titans. The mechanisms on the wall are doing their job to bring down as many of those as possible, but the danger is now here, amongst us." Whispers ran through the gathered men and women. "We will not be beaten," Erwin shouted. "We will stand strong, as always and we will eliminate the threat. Stay vigilant. Report any unusual behaviour. One of the enemies was discovered as one of our number. He has been dealt with and any further insurgents shall be dealt with swiftly as well." He paused to let the information sink in and saluted across the front of his body. "We. Will. Win." The crowd went wild, voices strong and emotions running high.

Levi stood behind the Commander, rolling his eyes at the scene in front of him. Now hormones would explode unchecked and there would be fights, arguments and childish shows of bravado. He was glad to be leaving it behind. He would go under cover of darkness with you by his side, explanation for your absences having been devised. You were to make for a known stronghold outside the walls and seek out the rocks. Sounded simple on paper. He sniffed and turned to get back to studying his maps.

~~~~~~

You sat with Alana and Jared at lunch, a heavy emotion pulling on your heart. You'd explained that you would be helping Hange set up a new lab and begin experiments in earnest, making up for lost time. You lied to their faces, them taking it all in as gospel and it hurt you deeply. Sighing, you stood to leave and bent down to give Alana a hug, gripping her tight. "What's up, (F/N)? You ok?" You broke your embrace and stood once more. 

"I'm ok, just Erwin's speech got me all emotional. I'll see you soon, ok?" You left and waved goodbye, your friends watching you go with curiosity, knowing full well you never got emotional. Leaving the hall, you bumped into Eren. His eyes lit up at the sight of you and chatted excitedly. 

"I'm so glad you're ok, it looked awful in there, you were so lucky." You smiled at his vibrancy, about to speak when Jean pushed the smaller boy out the way. They clashed, spitting hateful insults. Breaking them apart, you looked between them. 

"Now is not the time to fight each other. Right?" Telling them off like school children seemed to work and they were sufficiently chided, muttering faint agreement. "I'll see you guys later." As you walked away, you heard them start their bickering again and shook your head.

Knocking on Hange's door, you were greeted by a grin and an invitation to enter as you looked over her form with concern, wishing you could have had the foresight to stop her entering the lab. She waved your obvious expression off. "Don't be silly, I'm fine. I bounce back, always do." Her usual excitable demeanour changed to one of seriousness. "(F/N), be safe." She grabbed hold of you and hugged tightly as you realised she had been brought up to speed. Today was full of goodbyes, and you didn't like it.

"Hange, I'll be back soon. Ok? I'll be here to help you set up the new lab. I promise." You heard a sniff. Oh no, please no tears. She pulled herself together and held you in front of her, looking you up and down. 

"Tell me all about shorty when you get back, ok?" Laughing, you left the woman who you now considered a friend and walked to Levi's quarters.

~~~~~~

It was the dead of night. Horses were saddled, supplies tied on tightly and a shady pair wore civilian clothing and black hooded capes. Point blank refusing a skirt, you had borrowed some black trousers from the supply stores. Erwin saluted you both, eliciting a scoff. 

"Don't be such a fucking idiot." Levi, always the smooth talker. You looked to him in annoyance and turned back to the Commander with a warm smile. You could feel the disdain behind you and mounted your horse, the smaller one, a beast with whom you had an agreement - you knew he would come if you needed him. Without a second look, two shadowy figures set off into the unknown.

The guards at the gate had been informed of your need to exit ahead of your reaching them, the deal sealed with bribery and for the first time ever, you left the confines of the walls. The air smelt sweeter, the stars burned brighter and your adrenaline pumped. Knowing that titans were mostly dormant without sunlight, you tried to calm your nerves. All you could hear was the sound of galloping hooves and a fast heart beat in your ears.

Nearing the fort, your skin froze over and you told the horse to slow, stopping next to Levi. He had noticed it too. A fire light burned outside the doors of the small castle and you both knew that no greeting party had been arranged. Quickly, you gathered your hundred mile an hour thoughts and turned to him. "There's no way Alfonz would be here," you whispered. "So it must be the drones. If Hersh was telling the truth, there's three of them. But we should work on the assumption he lied." The man appreciated the fact that you knew how to read a situation; it meant he didn't need to bother with explanations. They must have been camping out here to stop you after they realised Hersh hadn't returned to them. You pulled a knife from your boot, ready to go. Sensing Levi's glare, you turned. 

"You stupid brat, stay here. I'm expendable on this whole thing. Unless you hadn't fucking realised, you are not. So stay the fuck in place." He kicked his horse's sides and flew off into the darkness. No. A single thought. No, you would not stay here. You would not be separated from him again an you were the reason for the infiltration in the Survey Corps, this was happening because of you and most of all, you wouldn't let that man go into this alone. Sensing your intentions, your steed galloped after Levi, catching him up quickly. One glance told you that he was fucking livid, but you both then turned to the job at hand.

You spotted all three of them instantly, sitting round their camp fire like they were about to start singing songs or something. Simultaneously, a pair of bodies jumped from horses, blades shining in the moonlight. With unexpected ease and in one fluid movement, you sliced a throat, kicking the other surprised man opposite to the ground. A swift look told you that Levi had dealt with the third person. You'd never killed anything before, human, titan, animal but you didn't care for the life you just took. He was there to kill you and you had to survive. It was what you did. 

The remaining living foot soldier lay on his back, trying to move away but failing. You approached him with venom in your eyes and your knees landed on the ground either side of him, trapping his wriggling frame. Bloody blade still in your hand, you were aware of an ally beside you.

"Where is it?" Voice harsh, you growled the request. The man shook underneath you and a sigh came from behind, disinterested in the whole thing as the Captain cleaned his blade on a cloth. 

"Look, tell us or she will kill you. Can't you see it in her eyes? She will rip you apart in seconds if you don't fucking talk." That worked, however you were a bit shocked at his words, not realising what your expression held. The guy pointed to a small hill, not too far away and now you didn't know what to do. You couldn't let him go, surely, but murder again? While you contemplated the options, you sensed movement. The fucking little shit had lied. You stretched your knife out towards the sound instinctively as a body hit you, blade flying from your hand. 

Rolling across the ground, you struggled with your assailant, punching and kicking in all the right places but even so, you felt a hand around your throat, squeezing tightly. You were aware of Levi dealing with the man you had been sitting on seconds ago and looked up to the piece of shit trying to strangle the life essence from you. Without thought, you reached to your other boot, a small blade in your hand. Stars began to dance in your eyes as oxygen became rare and all your strength went in to the final move, do or die. 

You thrust upwards with your knife and buried it deep underneath the male's ribs, blood flowing down your hand as the grip on you released and you gasped for breath. Pushing the corpse away, you looked over as your comrade stood, stains on his metal weapon also. He glanced over to make sure you were still alive and wiped his blade carefully on the dead man's shirt.

Making your way to the fort, you kicked dirt on the fire to extinguish it, not wanting to draw any attention and the doors opened easily under your push. Telling the horses silently to stay there, you paced in and looked around. One room existed here on the ground floor, an old, useless kitchen. Climbing the stairs, you found the other room. It had a roof, a bed, a set of drawers and that was it. You threw your supply bags on the mouldy mattress and grabbed a lamp from within, turning it on to assist with the dim light outside. Before you could do anything else, you heard a slam. Levi stood before you, the closed entrance behind him. He was furious. Anger seeped from every pore as his eyes glared. You had never seen so much rage.

"What. The fuck. Was that." He spoke in such measured tones, collected and cool and you knew he was ready to blow however you still made a mistake, knew it was an error as soon as you opened your mouth but you had to stand up for yourself. 

"What the fuck Levi, I was dealing with a situation." He moved so fast, no chance to evade the incoming attack as yet again you were pinned against the wall, his grip biting into your skin around your wrists, burning you and undoubtedly leaving bruises. His eyes flahsed with fire, hatred on his face. 

"I told you to stay there you fucking idiot, you could have gotten yourself killed." The wrath concealed a genuine concern and you could have argued, you could have excused your actions, but you stayed silent, (e/c) wells filled with the flickering light of the lamp. "Nothing to say, little shit?" His stare drilled into yours, expression full of ire as he came closer still, pressing against you. 

"You're hurting me." It came out in a whisper and you held your breath, waiting for the next run of insults. But he stayed silent, scowling in to your very soul. Levi's lips pressed suddenly on to yours, passionately kissing and your lids closed as he placed peck after hungry peck on your mouth. His hands released your wrists and your fingers moved instantly to tangle themselves in onyx hair, a rough touch on your waist, fingers searching to find the hem of your dark top and slipping up your bare back. Melting into him, you moaned lightly at the contact on your skin, allowing his tongue entry. 

He explored feverishly, wanting to taste every part of your mouth, devouring you with hunger. You joined the powerful embrace, own wet muscle stroking against his in mirroring actions, heat building inside of your body. He broke away and you stood looking into each other's eyes, panting slightly but the grip you held on to one another with did not release. The room lit up with a flash of lightning, matching the electricity that ran through you both and thunder roared darkly, rain now falling outside. 

Leaning in once more, Levi stole your lips into a soft kiss, not wanting to stop but knowing he had to. You hummed into his warm touch and almost cried out in frustration when he pulled back again. Seeing your reaction, he smirked, a small twitch in the corner of his now slightly pink pout. "We have to get our bearings and prepare for the next part of this shitty mission." You realised you were still clutching on to each other, reluctant to break contact. Groaning at the reality of the situation, you nodded and tore yourself away. "Gross." A disdainful mutter came from across the tiny room and you felt icy shivers tickle at your neck, stomach clenching. Had he found your kiss that disgusting? Seemed to be enjoying it a minute ago, the fucking idiot....

You stopped your thoughts as soon you saw what had made him speak and looked at your bloodied hands, ones that had been twined in his locks very recently. Oh shit. Cringing, you waited for what he would do next, knowing that he would be fuming at the prospect of getting filthy. "Wash your fucking hands before you touch me again, brat." Slight smile in his mouth again, he looked over and threw you a cloth from his bag. 

"Thanks, I will." That was a promise; you couldn't stop thinking about touching him again and the intention in your choice of words was not lost on the man. Checking through your stuff, you brought the tools to the top so they would be in easy reach. Levi checked his map, noting the location of the small hill in relation to the walls and safety. The mound wasn't far, a minute by horse if that and you had only travelled quarter of an hour to the fort. All perfectly manageable. Apart from the pissing rain; he'd get all muddy. Never mind, he mused - you could clean the flithy boots when you got back, payback for getting his hair all dirty.

You made your way downstairs to the waiting animals, mounting them swiftly and pulling hoods up against the downpour. He nodded once and you were off, freezing water slapping you in the face as you galloped over the open field. The hill sparkled slightly as you reached it, you could see veins of shining rock fanning across the earth and without hesitation you dropped to your knees, tools in hand and began to chip away at the dark material. It wasn't easy, even with your strength. Hersh had told you it must be at least bigger than your fist, but you wondered how true that was. Maybe the fourth man you'd encountered had been an oversight, a new recruit, but you still harboured a nagging worry.

"Are you fucking done yet?" You looked up at Levi, still sat royally on his horse and thought about how you must have appeared, covered in mud, rain running down you in rivers. Shooting him an angry look, you turned back to the ardous task. It was taking too long, a faint suggestion of sunrise playing across the dark skies. With growing unease, you attacked the rock until a large chunk fell out. It was the size of your head and you heaved it into a saddle bag and jumped on your ride. 

Sheets of water continued to fall, but breaks in the cloud could be seen on the horizon as morning sun tried to force it's way through. Your horse whinnied loudly and you mumbled in fear to Levi. "Titans." Quickly, he moved his mare to your side, placing a hand on your shaking arm. 

"Don't engage. We're not far from the walls. The mechanisms will kill the stupid big shits once we get there. We have arrangements for re-entry, two flares. Got it?" You nodded, unconvinced but it was the best course of action in your situation.

Moving off at a tremendous pace, you made your way towards the safety and heard thundering footsteps all around you, but you didn't dare turn to look. Levi gave you a glance, getting your attention with fire in his eyes. "Just keep going. Nearly there, get your flare ready." The walls loomed as you both shot a canister of smoke into the wet sky, a flash on top of the wall confirming that you'd been seen and you raced to the gate, blinded almost by the driving rain. 

Shooting through the opening, you slowed and turned as you saw just how close they had been to you. Four fifteen metre class titans tried to force their way through the intentional gaps in the wall and the Garrison troops activated the mechanisms, cogs turning as the heavy blocks landed on their targets, killing them effectively. You shuddered, partly due to your soaked clothing but also because of the close call.

A soldier approached you. "You guys are fucking crazy, you know that?" Levi grunted and looked around with disinterest while you laughed back at the man, speaking with relief. 

"Yea I'm starting to think so!" You offered your sincere thanks and made the way back to headquarters, dripping wet and thoroughly exhausted. It was still early enough that no one should be awake to see you return.

Reaching the stables, the horses were placed in with some food and water, planning to return later to clean them down. You thanked them both, earning you a sarcastic tut from Levi but you didn't care, the beasts had done well and they deserved some recognition. Making your way quietly through the halls, you neared Levi's quarters and saw two figures by the door. Erwin and Hange. The woman was jumping up and down on the spot at the sight of you and grabbed you into a hug as you got closer. 

"Eww (F/N), you're all wet and muddy. He's not going to let you in there looking like that!" You glanced down at your sorry state, thinking it was probably true that you would have to go somewhere else to clean first. She turned her attention to the relatively unstained but drenched Levi. Her eyes narrowed. "How did you get blood in your hair?" You turned to hide the blush that threatened your face, busying yourself with a bag as if it was the most important thing in life. 

"Mind your own business, four eyes. Can we at least get fucking dried off before the interrogation starts?" Erwin placed his hand on the female's shoulder, speaking softly. 

"He's right. Let them get sorted and then we'll meet in my office an hour from now." She pouted, but obeyed the order and they walked off, turning the corner towards the Commander's quarters. You sighed and shouldered your heavy bags. 

"I'll go get cleaned up," you muttered, making to leave. A hand gripped your arm and you looked curiously up. 

"Don't be fucking stupid. Remember, I have to keep an eye on you at all times. But any mess you make in here, you will be putting right. Got it?" You smiled sarcastically and followed him inside.

The Captain had gone straight to shower as the knowledge of the blood in his hair had been eating away at him and you carefully removed filthy boots, placing them on your cloak - the idea was to bundle everything up in the dark fabric and deal with it all later and then you would be scrubbing the pristine floor that you had soiled with rain and mud.

Hearing the water stop, you stood up to stretch your aching limbs, hands still crusted with dried blood. They would need a good soaping, you thought as you heard a door open from behind. Instantly, you realised the monumental error. In your haste to keep all the muddied clothes in one place, you now stood in Levi's office wearing only underwear. Redness crept up your face, you were frozen on the spot and there was a dark humour in his voice when he spoke. "Your turn." Two simple words that would otherwise be innocent, but the way in which he delivered them made your stomach do cartwheels. There was no double meaning, but his deep, growling purr had turned your thoughts as filthy as your appearance. Taking a deep breath, you ran for the shower, head down, not looking in his direction.

After you'd washed thoroughly, you stood under the hot water for a while, easing your pains. Snapping out of your thoughtless daydreaming, you dried down and made you way into the bedroom. Levi had taken the liberty of obtaining a clean uniform from the bag that you'd hastily packed when abandoning your home and had laid it neatly on the bed. You smiled at the gesture and got yourself quickly dressed. A comb had also been placed with the clothes and you ran it through your thankfully now spotless hair, tackling the tangles until they had all gone. 

Mentally, you prepared yourself for coming face to face with him again after your streak through his quarters. Maybe he wouldn't mention it? Stepping out into the main office, you saw him watching from behind his desk. Oh, he was going to mention it alright. You could see it all over his smug face. Trying to reclaim some kind of dignity, you walked in with your head high and sat stiffly on the couch, not looking. You kept a stern expression on your face as determined eyes stared straight ahead at the wall. In your peripheral vision, you saw him come closer and felt his weight hit the cushioned seat next to you. The infuriatingly calm man crossed his legs and draped his left arm over the back of the sofa, hand just behind where you sat bolt upright.

You could feel superiority radiating from him, aware of the steel grey gaze and his voice was taunting as he spoke. "I don't know what you're getting so upset about, (F/N). From what I gathered during your little moment with Kirstein, plenty of people have seen you in a lot less than I just fucking did." Your face burned. Turning to him with murderous orbs, you tried to retort. 

"That...but...I didn't....it was...." Words failed you and you could see how much he was enjoying watching you squirm. Brows raising slightly, he added to the discomfort and leant in. 

"Oh, so you're saying that no one has seen you naked before?" He was making this really difficult and you were usually quite unflappable. 

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all Levi, I..." Again you had no idea what to say.

"So which is it to be, (F/N)?" he said plainly, relishing in your embarrassment. "Are you a prude or a slut?" You huffed, fed up of this conversation and spoke with exasperation. 

"Can't I just be somewhere in between?" His lips twitched - now it was him that was speechless. On the surface he hardly changed his exterior, but you knew he must have been struggling inside to answer your question. So he took the easy way out. You were pushed down strongly onto the couch, everywhere, lips pressing roughly on to yours. All thoughts left your mind as you threw your arms around Levi, pulling him closer, your hands tugging at his shirt. 

The kiss that began out in the fort deepened as you found warm flesh beneath his uniform, your fingers dancing over his muscular back. He broke away from your lips and turned his attention to your neck, leaving a trail of heated kisses and nipping lightly at your skin. You moaned his name softly, digging your nails in and felt his smirk on your flesh. He stopped abruptly and sat up, flashing silver eyes drinking all of you in and he reached for the buttons on your shirt. Four were undone quickly and he dipped his head once more to press his warm mouth onto your newly exposed body. The feeling was incredible, a passion built up deep within you both that begged to be sated. Just as he was reaching to remove the garment altogether, a loud knock sounded on the door.

"Not fucking now, fuck off." Levi shouted across the room and turned his concentration back to your lips. A timid voice spoke from behind the door. 

"Erm Sir, Captain, umm the Commander has asked for a debrief. Sir. Sorry." Levi pulled back again, growling as his tension had risen almost to the point of no return. 

"Alright you shit, just piss off." Footsteps got swiftly quieter, signalling that they had run away in fear of repercussions.

"Fuck it." He spat whilst tucking in his shirt and returned to his usual impeccably dressed self. You hastily worked on your buttons and smoothed your hair down, noticing it was still wet from the shower. Grumbles of total frustration spilled from his mouth as he straightened out his uniform. "Fucking stupid fucking Erwin, the little shit. Pissing debrief." Both smart enough to be presentable, you made for the door. Before you could turn the handle, Levi lifted his hand to gently cup your chin and turned your head to his, placing a kiss on your mouth that let you know how badly he wanted you.

"This isn't over, (F/N)." He left and stalked towards the relevant office, leaving you to follow behind, hoping his last comment had been a promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know its a bizarre premise but when I originally wrote this, I didn't want to go down the 'normal' route, and this kind of came out...


	6. Release

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hadn't realised I'd written a whole chapter of pretty much nothing but smut in here...ah well.

You had to break into a jog to keep up with Levi as he marched menacingly down the hall, fists balled with rage at his side. He was livid, but it made you smile knowing why he was so angry and he didn't even bother to knock, barging straight into Erwin's office, walking over to his usual place against the wall, arms crossed and full-on sulking. The Commander's large eyebrows raised in silent question as he stared at the enraged figure while you closed the door quietly, breathless and on edge, taking a seat quickly next to Hange. You would never admit it to him, but Levi's touch had made your legs weaken, the effects still running strong. 

"Care to explain?" Shooting a scowl to the large blonde who had spoken, the pale man hissed his reply. 

"Could have given us a fucking chance to get our breath back." About to explain it had been over an hour since they left you, Erwin was cut off by a knock at the door and invited the newcomer to join. Jacob entered, instantly sensing tension in the air but he didn't even want to know so asked another question instead. 

"How did it go (F/N)?" 

You told the those in the office all about the mission, obviously leaving out any details about what had happened in the fort. Silence followed your story and the one in charge looked deep in thought as he began a summary. "Levi, (F/N) will still need your protection detail for now." The dark haired male offered a tut of annoyance to the room, but you knew deep down he would be pleased at that. Thoughts entered your head once more, filthy thoughts and you tried to keep them at bay as you felt a warm pulling in your stomach. "I need to think about the next steps carefully. As it stands, Alfonz will no doubt be aware soon enough that the men he sent to intercept you were unsuccessful. We don't know if there are any others involved so secrecy and safety are key." He looked around the room at each of you. "Carry on as usual, I will contact you once I have a plan. (F/N), report to Hange tomorrow to resume experiments." 

The older woman squealed with joy, eyes glinting dangerously. You were worried. Erwin pointed to Levi and then you. "Get some food, get some rest. No excuses." Everyone stood and left his office to let him consider the night's events.

"Oh (F/N) it's going to be so much fun to have you back, I have so many things I need to do!" A shrieking female practically panted with anticipation in your ear and you gave a tired smile.

"It's only been, what, a day since we were last working together?" Truth was pointed out, but she ran off in pure excitement. Jacob sighed and delivered his current calling in life.

"Erwin's told me to watch out for her in case the bang to head has affected her. Not sure how I'd tell though..." He rushed off to follow the ecstatic woman, leaving two people remaining free to do as they wished. 

In silence, you and Levi made your way back to his room, chest tight whilst a growing desire burned within you that hadn't been felt so strongly before. There had been other men in the underground city, of course, you were only human, but they were inconsequential. Your stomach growled at you in hunger but you ignored it - there were more important things on your mind.

Reaching the door in an empty corridor, the Captain motioned for you to step inside. You stood in the middle of his office and turned as he closed up behind him, securing the lock. Eyes met and stared at each other with pure, unadulterated lust, bodies longing to pick up from where they last left off. Neither of you moved at first as both your minds wandered but in seconds you were connected, lips open, tongues searching. Hands were in your hair, on your body, all over. You grabbed at Levi's shirt and pulled at it impatiently. Without breaking your kiss, you ripped his buttons apart and he moved his arms out of the fabric, letting it fall to the floor. Your hands took hold of him, running over his muscles, feeling every inch of his toned body. 

Struggling with your own top, his feverish fingers assisted and you were freed of the restrictive cloth. You hadn't put anything on underneath after your shower and the cool air hit your chest like ice. Strong hands ran over your skin and it warmed you from the inside. Naked torsos were pressed against each other as moans escaped into the room and Levi broke away, looking deeply into your eyes. He took your hand and led you quickly to the adjoining bedroom without words.

Faint red welts adorned his body from years of the leather straps biting into his porcelain skin and you ran your fingers gently over the marks, moving your hands lower still to open the metal studs on his trousers. As they fell, he stepped out of them and embraced you once more, the deep kiss continuing. He worked at your remaining clothes and, naked other than underwear, he held you close and lowered you to the bed. Limbs were intertwined as your figures writhed on top of clean sheets and you felt him pull at your panties. Discarding them, he moved back to where they had just been, digits dancing lightly over your wetness. You threw your head back, groaning his name as he explored more deeply, fingers now inside, lips on your breast as his tongue traced circles around your nipple, small bites sending you into ecstasy. He picked up the pace, thumb rubbing your clit and you raised your hips towards his touch.

Reaching down, you ran your fingers under the band of his underwear, tugging to gain entry. Levi shuffled to rid himself of the last bit of clothing between the two of you and your hand reached out to take his length. Stroking him gently up and down, you felt him shudder slightly at your touch and he moved his face up to yours. He looked down into (e/c) flashes, both of you a mess of panting breath and whispers. You gripped his shaft tighter and he growled. 

"(F/N), I want you, now." Both of you moved and he pressed his tip against your entrance, still holding his gaze which had become clouded. 

"You can have me, Levi." At the ragged words, he thrust inside. The feeling of every inch of him was delicious, filling you completely and sending shivers down your spine. He began to move, pounding deep and slow. Your eyes were still connected as you moaned in pleasure, every part of you alight with the new found passion. It had sprung from years of knowing one another, years of being apart and now the reunion was culminating in a way neither of you would have imagined possible until recently, a fire awoken that refused to be dampened. 

Lips crashed into yours once more as you ground your hips up against his, pace becoming faster and more insistent. You could feel his hardness rubbing inside of you, each strong push bringing wave after wave of ecstasy. Moans became louder, names were groaned and you felt yourself coming undone, built up tension delivering you to this point. Levi broke away, gasping for breath as raven locks framed his face, features urgent but placid for once, a look of pure contentment in your line of sight.

"Shit (F/N)…shit…" He couldn't manage anything else, totally entranced in your flushed cheeks, soft skin and the amazing feeling of the woman beneath, one whom he'd thought was lost but had been returned to him along with previously unknown need. The clear danger you'd been placed in gave a spur to his unusual protective side, showing you physically that this care wasn't just due to requirement, it was so much more. Levi dipped his head, small pecks applied as he felt you pushing upwards, taking him in further with each roll of the hips, your touch holding tight to his flesh. This wasn't purely for another animal release - it seemed right. 

Almost ready to lose control, he panted quickly in time with the fast rhythm, a hand behind your head and one on the mattress, knot in his stomach threatening to explode at any minute. You saw the look in his eyes, the hazy expression as white flecks sparkled unnaturally and realised your end was close, mouth open as air was dragged in to be expelled in almost desperate calls. Levi breathed your name once more and placed his head down, lips mumbling at your neck and the intensity finally sent you over the edge, fingernails digging into his back. 

"Levi! Oh fuck…yes!" You shouted out with abandonment, slamming up in fervent movements, legs wrapped around his. Euphoria overcame all else as you gripped tightly, feeling his pace become erratic, riding you to his own orgasm. Releasing inside, he moaned deeply, forehead now up against yours as he gasped for breath. You continued moving together slowly, prolonging the pleasure as the last threads of your peaks ran through your veins in delectable, warm shots. Voice slightly shaking, he spoke in whispers. 

"(F/N)…shit…I…fuck…"

Eventually your motions halted, breaths ragged, eyes locked. Levi moved to lay beside you, still gazing into your (e/c) orbs as you regained composure, fingers dancing over his body, not wanting to stop touching. You felt his hands caressing and true happiness washed over you for the first time. Still tangled together, the pale man pulled a sheet over you both, stroking your face gently as he smiled lightly. Sleep was soon threatening, but you didn't want to leave this moment. As if in reply to your thoughts, he kissed you sweetly, sending you both into a satisfied slumber.

~~~~~~

When you woke, the fading evening sun still clung on to the sky, sending its final rays across the clouds. You weren't surprised to find the bed next to you empty, Levi never was one for sleeping. Pulling your shirt and underwear on, you moved through to the main office, rubbing your eyes and yawning, hair in a complete fuzzy mess. The guy was nowhere to be seen but a towel had been carefully folded on top of the stack of items to be washed, suggesting he'd showered. I must've been exhausted, you thought. Even slept through the noise of water. Given what had happened earlier, you'd certainly be needing to get cleaned up soon too. 

The door swung open suddenly and you jumped in slight fear until Levi marched in, tray in hand. He placed the food on the desk and as he turned to lock up, his grey eyes travelled from your feet, looking over your strong, naked legs that had been wrapped around him not so long ago. A faint hint of your underwear poked out from beneath the shirt and he felt his heat rising once more, but suppressed it for now. You needed to eat before he lost control again.

"Sit." You wasted no time in attacking the hot food, shovelling stew into your mouth and speaking thickly. 

"Thank you." He watched your eating habits with disdain. 

"Tch. So fucking disgusting." The Captain turned to look out the window, tea in hand and you realised you'd never seen him eat before, but decided not to press that issue. Some things obviously remain private.

"Any news from Erwin?" you mumbled, bread making your words unclear. You heard another click of his tongue as he remained in place, his back to you still. 

"Empty your mouth before you fucking speak again. And no, he's still thinking." He emphasised the last word, voice sarcastic. "He was sat at his desk looking like he was taking a shit." You snorted in laughter at the image in your head as Levi turned once he heard you had stopped eating. "You'll be back with that freak tomorrow. I need to check in with my squad too. Probably haven't cleaned anything in hours." Smiling at his obvious concern over the cleanliness of his subordinates, your brain brought a thought from nowhere and you sighed. He raised an eyebrow to you, wordlessly asking the reason for your sudden change in demeanour. 

"I miss them, Levi." He didn't need to ask who you meant. 

"So do I (F/N)." It came out softer than his usual growl as the faces of your lost friends surfaced in his mind. He'd had time to process their passing, but it was still raw for you. The sudden, uninvited thoughts of Isabel and Farlan would be vivid for some time to come.

You took some tea from the tray and sipped at the warming liquid, moving to the window to take your turn at staring over the landscape. The sun was but a memory, distant clouds illuminated underneath in a striking pink colour. No rain tomorrow you thought, remembering a rhyme that someone had taught you once. Levi moved to join you, looking back out over the grounds of the HQ. You could feel his breath on your skin as he came closer and brushed your hair from your neck, lips deliriously close to your flesh. 

"Seeing as we're back to duty tomorrow, might as well make the most of our free time, hmm?" The voice purred and you grinned widely, warm mouth placing small kisses on your exposed neck, his hands winding round your waist from behind.

~~~~~~

You threw your head back onto the pillow, gasping for air, your hands gripping above you on to the wooden bed frame as Levi slowly pushed deep and hard inside for the fourth time this evening. His lips were all over you, tongue licking at your breasts, playing deliciously with your nipples as he curled his back to offer the extra sensations. Long-lost friends had now seemingly become lovers and the man was doing things that you didn't think possible. Just a simple touch would turn you to a wobbly mess, a look from his silver eyes sent you insane. Vice versa, he found himself incapable of keeping away now that this had been discovered, your sweet scent mesmerising, demure voice alluring.

His face was over yours now and you hungrily grabbed him, lips devouring his as if your life depended on it. Your bodies melded together as you flipped him over and sat up, legs either side of his and you looked down into his gaze as you began to grind against his length, his tip reaching so far with each push. He stared up at your writhing body with lust in his eyes and grabbed your hips, moving up hard into you. Levi increased his grip as the pace intensified and leaning down, you pressed your hands into the sheets on each side of his head, thrusting down on him at a dizzying speed. 

Grey pools became distant as you felt your own climax approaching fast and his hands moved to your back, fingers digging in harshly. The pain mixed with pleasure was too much for you as you moaned loudly, hedonistic delight running through your veins as you tightened around his shaft and called out in a high pitched squeal. The hold on your flesh increased as he reached his peak, coming strongly inside of you, groaning your name in a low growl.

Your arms gave way and you lay together, tangled and breathless like you had been before. You never thought you could find a feeling like this, after all you had been through and you certainly never thought it would be with him - you'd believed he was dead for years. Fingers traced circles on your side idly, causing goosebumps to spring up. This man's touch was electric and you buried your head into his chest, hearing the ever slow heart beat drumming within.

Levi was happy. He was never happy with anything, seeing as most people, things and situations pissed him off. But you were different. He had never thought of you this way before, but when he had looked into your suddenly beautiful eyes that time, faces so close in the heat of an argument, he felt something. And he knew exactly what needed to be done. He needed to have you, not just physically either. You made him fulfilled, so he needed to cling to that with every fibre of his being. He would never admit to anyone how even the sight of you now made his chest burn. He laid pressed close, making meaningless patterns on your soft skin, never wanting to move from here. A smile crept up on his lips, not a smirk or sarcastic grimace, an actual smile. He was glad you couldn't see it.

~~~~~~

Hange walked up the corridor, boxes of scientific equipment in hand, faint headache still lingering from the explosion. She was setting up a new lab in an undisclosed room near Levi's quarters at Erwin's request so you didn't risk encountering any potential assailants. She thought he was being a bit over cautious, but she trusted his judgement. 

Passing the Captain's office she stopped, eyes wide. The woman could swear she heard faint moans and whispers, slight movements at a regular pace. A blush crept up the woman's face and a grin appeared. "Not lovers? Ha!" she said to herself and practically skipped away down the hall.


	7. Threat

Making your way down the corridors, you could smell breakfast, stomach ravenous and food leading you to the destination. Levi followed behind and it took everything in your control not to turn around and place your hands all over his body, so you kept your eyes forward and took deep breaths to calm your nerves. Entering the mess hall, you grabbed a plate and hurried over to a table that Alana and Jared sat at. The frowning pale man took his place between Erwin and Hange, tea held delicately in his hand. He swept his bored gaze over the occupants of the room, checking everyone over to see if any of them were looking at you strangely, searching for potential assailants. Not that anyone would do anything here - he was just staying vigilant. The only person that seemed to be looking was the Yeager boy. Levi was sure he wasn't a problem, there was no way he was caught up in all of this as well, but it was still a source of annoyance.

His half-lidded eyes landed on you, chatting excitedly with your two friends, so full of life. Jared had placed a hand on your arm, telling his part of whatever the story was. The Captain stiffened slightly, displeasure running through him at the sight of someone else touching you but before his thoughts could turn even darker, Hange leant into him and spoke in a low voice that only he could hear. "Don't you think you're taking this protection detail a little too seriously, shorty?" Levi didn't move, didn't even entertain the notion of justifying her comment with a response. Taking this as her cue to continue, she whispered to the stony man once more. "I thought you were just supposed to be watching out for any enemies, not banging her." He shot his glare round to her, blood boiling and shards of mercury pinning her in place. 

"What the fuck are you talking about, four eyes?" She just winked knowingly. 

"Unless I was mistaken, I could have sworn I heard some very suggestive noises coming from your quarters last night." Her smile taunted him and he made sure to remain emotionless, not letting the smirk out that threatened his lips. 

"You're hearing things again. Must be going senile in your old age." It didn't have any effect on Hange as she threw her head back with laughter. Erwin glanced over to see what was so funny as the woman threw Levi another wink.

"Whatever that was all about, I don't want to know." The Commander spoke with fatigue, moving towards what would no doubt be a more grown up conversation. "I've sent Jacob and his squad on a mission to see if they can gain any information on our friend's whereabouts." A thin eyebrow raised slightly, tea placed down carefully. 

"What makes you think you can trust those shits?" 

"I know you're concerned, but I do feel that they can be relied upon, Levi. As soon as they have any word, they'll report back." The Captain still wasn't pleased, but he would have to accept his superior's choices.

Unaware of the events being discussed, you listened to Jared's story about the hand to hand training they had taken part in yesterday, laughing hard at the bit that involved Alana pinning down Jean in a swift victory. Feeling eyes on you, you turned to see the topic of conversation glaring, obviously figuring out what it was that caused you so much glee. You smiled and waved and he turned away again, thoroughly pissed. Alana started to talk about how you must be getting out of condition, seeing as you hadn't done anything physical for a few weeks. Trying your hardest not to blush at her words, you muttered something about getting some training in soon, pushing the thoughts of both your mission and passionate night with Levi to the back of your mind. If only she knew how much your body ached from both of those things.

You finished eating and said goodbye to your friends. The girl smiled back and you caught a faint glimmer of a thought. You hadn't tried to, you didn't want to invade her privacy like that, but it rang out to you. There were no words but images of conflict, tough decisions and emotional choices. You made a mental note to speak with her later as she was obviously troubled about something. Seeing you stand, Levi took his leave and made his way to the doors to escort you to the lab. Hange got up too, waving goodbye to Erwin in her usual excited manner. Trotting behind the short man, she continued to buzz around him. 

"I know you'd rather go back to your room, if you know what I mean, but I'm afraid I need to borrow (F/N) for the experiments," she whispered in a conspiring tone. "Don't worry, I won't wear her out too much." She waggled her eyebrows and broke the dark haired male's temper. Slamming her against the wall, not caring for her recent injury, he spat words in her face. 

"Whatever you think you know, just keep your shitty mouth shut and stop bothering me or I'll shove those fucking glasses down your throat." He stalked off once you had caught up and left the two women to follow behind. 

"What the hell was that about?" She grinned maniacally at your query. 

"Oh, you know, (F/N)." No, you didn't, but you left it alone, not wanting to find out what was going on in her head.

None of you had noticed the pair of eyes watching intently as you left the hall.

Safely reaching the new lab, Levi grunted a goodbye and left you with Hange. Experiments began in earnest, pushing you to your limits and leaving you feeling drained. She had made a few comments about sleep and how you should get more of it, but you were concentrating too much on the task at hand to care about what she was getting at.

A few hours later and you prepared yourself to try to make your squad leader do something that she couldn't normally achieve - a cartwheel. She had shown you she was incapable of performing the gymnastic move and wanted to find out if your commands could override her inability. You stood firm, looking dead at her, ready to try out the rather silly sounding task when a loud, deep voice filled your head. Like earlier, there were no real words, just feelings and noises, a distinct voice ringing out in nonsense sounds. It hurt, oh fuck it hurt and you brought your hands up to your head. 

Hange looked worried, thinking it was too much to get her to carry out the impossible move, but then something changed her mind. You were muttering, asking something to stop, to go away, to get out of your mind. Shaking your head in futile attempts to try to remove whoever had invaded your thoughts, you felt a trickle on your face. A drop of blood ran from your left ear down to your jaw. You squeezed your eyes shut as the female gripped hold of you, trying to bring you out of whatever this was, however it didn't help. The meaningless voice was warning you. No, promising you. You would be hurt, tortured, killed. You would be stopped and soon. You could not be allowed to continue living.

As quickly as it had arrived, the event was gone, leaving behind a burning in your skull and an unbelievable pain. Your vision was fine at least, but you felt violated. This wasn't like someone telling you what to do, as you had done with Eren. That hadn't hurt the boy. This was something different, something malicious and uncaring. You sank to the floor, hands still pressed to your temples, sobbing gently. Hange sat down with you and held you in her arms, rocking slightly to soothe you like a mother does with their upset child. It took a while, but you managed to calm down sufficiently. The agony remained and made you feel sick, stomach churning but you pushed through it to tell your friend what had happened.

Her expression grew darker as you continued on, trying to explain how something could speak with no words. She understood, you had been very descriptive throughout your experiments and she felt she knew exactly what you meant. Nodding, the caring woman stroked your hair and continued to hold you as she felt you trembling against her body. You don't know how long you stayed like that, but were thankful for her care, glad that this had happened in the company of someone who knew what was going on. 

Footsteps outside the door made her look up as Levi entered, beginning to tell you it was time for lunch. He stopped abruptly and his eyes filled with venom as he turned to Hange. 

"What the fuck did you do to her?" His voice was laced with threat as he approached you both, looming over the pair on the floor. You brought your head from her chest and looked up, a wretched look on your face and that's when he saw the blood. Blind rage took over and he practically threw Hange off you, kneeling to gather you up into his embrace. He gently turned your head so he could see where the dark red line of liquid had come from, then looked over to the heap in the corner. "Tell me now, you little shit, what have you done?" The words came out in a livid whisper, voice almost shaking with fury.

The assaulted female sat up, rubbing the back of her head but before she could talk, you cut in. "Levi, it wasn't Hange. It was him." Dangerous eyes met yours as tears once more spilled over your face without sound.

"Explain." Following his order, you relayed what had happened. The woman had joined you again, her hand on your shoulder to show you that she was also here for you in this crazy situation. The three of you sat on the floor in silence, ideas and concerns running through your minds. You placed your face into Levi's warm chest, breathing in his comforting smell, not caring what your superior would say at the gesture. His hand cradled your head protectively, pulling you closer, grey eyes flashing with murderous intent. "This has to end. Now." He spoke in a low tone and carefully took a cloth from his pocket with his free hand, gently wiping the blood from your face, such a simple movement but it was filled with emotion. Hange looked upon the sight in front of her, seeing the care with which you were being handled and instantly regretted the teasing she had been subjecting you both to. She might be a bit crazy, but she was a romantic at heart.

You were carried the short distance to Levi's room, becoming a bit tired of having to rely on people carting you around so much - you were annoyed at the feeling of weakness. The man laid you down on his bed, a wholly different action to the way he had passionately thrown you on it last night and a hastily obtained cold cloth was placed on your head to help ease the pain, a glass of water passed over. Shaking, you took it and sipped slowly. Hange watched quietly as the man tended to you with care and then slipped out of the room to allow you a short time together as she ran off to get Erwin.

Levi sighed and placed your drink down on the small table next to the bed. Taking your hands, he made a silent vow to make sure you were never alone through this, he would be by your side, regardless of how events unfolded. Leaning down he placed a gentle kiss on your lips, then your forehead and brought your hands up to lay his warm mouth on the back of each one. You smiled lightly at his touch, the deep worry that lay beneath the simple gesture. "I won't let him get to you, (F/N). I'm going to make that fucker pay." Knowing full well that you were going to be the one that had to take down Alfonz, you looked up with sorrow in your eyes. 

"You know I have to do it, I can't risk bringing you any further into this as you already are. I won't lose you again." Tears threatened at your eyes for a third time and you swallowed back the lump in your throat. 

"Shut up, brat. I'm in this whether you like it or not." He was as stubborn as you and there was no point in arguing. The door opened in the adjoining office and your newly discovered lover sat up straight, grabbing another dampened cloth and swapping it with the one on your head. The one he removed from you was burning hot, something he had noticed when he kissed your forehead. The temperature running through you concerned him and he made you take some more water. Erwin approached and you saw he had brought a chair in from the other room. Sitting on it next to the bed, he looked at Levi, then back to you solemnly. 

"Hange has told me what happened. I also have some interesting news from Jacob." You sat up suddenly at his words and the room began to spin, head pounding in agony. Before you could stop it, the world started to go fuzzy and the last thing you saw were Levi's wide grey eyes and his hand reaching out to you. Blackness took over as you passed out, head falling backwards.

"(F/N)? (F/N)?" Levi shook you, the ache in his voice clear. He placed his palm on your head, feeling the same raging fever and he checked your wrist for a pulse. It was slightly irregular, but strong. "Hange, have you got anything to help with this?" Two faces looked at him in surprise - he never used her name. "Quit fucking staring at me and do something, you shit," he spat, normality restored. She hurried off to the lab to find some medicines that might assist and the Captain was aware of eyes still on him and turned to Erwin. "What?" He shot one word at the Commander with annoyance. 

"Levi, we can talk about some other matters later, but for now I need to tell you what Jacob's squad discovered." Considering the words just spoken, Levi realised that his behaviour around you had been quite noticeably different and figured this was the 'other matters' that the large man wanted to talk about. Whatever, he didn't give a shit.

Hange returned with a small bottle of liquid and Levi snatched it from her impatiently. Placing a hand behind your head, he lifted your seemingly lifeless body from the bed. Holding your form against him tightly with his right arm, he poured some of the medicine into your parted lips and closed your mouth for you. Reflexes taking over, your body swallowed. He looked sideways to the older woman, silently asking a question. Luckily, she picked up on what he meant as he was in no mood to start explaining simple things. 

"Give her all of it." He continued to administer the medicine in small mouthfuls, not wanting to make you choke. Everyone sat in silence as he carefully tended to you. Finally finished, he placed the bottle on the table and lowered you gently down once more, stopping to brush a strand of hair from your face. Turning to Erwin with an emotionless stare, he sat impatiently waiting to hear what the discovery had been.

"There is another infiltrator in the Corps." Hange gasped and covered her mouth and Levi stiffened. "They're here to kill (F/N) and anyone who gets in their way. Hersh obviously didn't know about the backup plan and I don't see any worth in interrogating him further. They'll make sure to get her alone and have it look like an accident, much like the explosion. They don't want any attention on them." Minds whirred with a thousand thoughts and the raven haired male was the first to speak up after the revelation, words hissed quietly. 

"How do you know all this?" Erwin had expected to be asked that and had made sure he had a full account from Jacob. 

"Their sources led them to a man who is connected to Alfonz. He was involved in the planning of getting two people into the Survey Corps and knew about the back up. What he didn't know is why they waited for (F/N) to enlist. It may be that they didn't know about her until she came of age." Hange frowned. 

"Came of age?" The Commander continued in answer to her question. 

"Apparently, their scriptures define someone of age as over 20. Anyone younger than that could never usually harness their skills or abilities, whatever they may be, no matter how hard they tried and therefore aren't on their radar. (F/N) joined us just at the right time. Had she not left the underground when she did, she would likely be dead by now." He let his words sink in and Levi couldn't help but wonder whether you had instinctively known when to leave.

Hange spoke once more. "So how do we find the shitty traitor?" Her eyes were dark as she felt like an animal backed into a corner, fight or flight instinct kicking in to side with the former emotion. Surprised by her vehemence, Erwin turned to see the expression on her face. It was like having two Levi's. He let them in to his plans. 

"We have to watch everyone like a hawk, any interactions people may have with (F/N), any eyes looking her way. We can't keep her hidden all the time." The short tempered soldier stood up from the bed to stare down at where his superior sat on the chair. 

"Of course we fucking can. If there's someone around here that wants to harm her then we shitting well keep her hidden away." Erwin kept calm and looked up with gentle blue eyes. 

"I understand your concern, Levi, I really do, but you can't let your personal feelings get in the way of something bigger." It outright confirmed that he was not blind and he was very much aware of what was probably between you two. Remaining expressionless, the smaller man continued with rage. 

"That's bullshit, personal feelings aren't an issue for me, so you can stop talking crap." The blonde was not convinced, but decided to stop this part of the conversation and move onto important matters.

"We carry on as we are, experiments with Hange, protection at all times but not in a blatant manner. Keep it quiet. Any concerns, you come to me. Jacob's squad were not present when the informant divulged this, so the only ones who know are us and Jacob. And I think we can all agree, that is a trustworthy group." Eyes were on the Commander as he spoke again. "The matter of Alfonz can wait until we eliminate this more urgent threat. Hange, you stay here and watch over (F/N), take note of her temperature, we need to help her get well. Levi, my office." 

The woman's eyes widened as the standing figure moved even closer to the large man. "No." She had heard them argue and bicker like a married couple before, but had never heard Levi blankly refuse an order. Erwin stood, towering over his subordinate, anger etched on his face. 

"My. Office. Now." Something in his voice meant that this was not a negotiation and the one ordered thought about it for a moment before turning to leave. 

"Stupid old man," he said as he walked through the door, followed closely by the other guy. Hange sat on the bed next to you and felt your head gently. Still too hot. She placed a new cloth on and checked your pulse. It was strong but your breathing was shallow and quick. More medicine was required but she couldn't leave your side until someone returned. 

"Oh (F/N), " she whispered, smoothing your hair. "That stupid shorty really does care for you, doesn't he?"

Levi leant against the office wall, arms crossed and boredom on his face. Erwin paced in front of him, thinking of what to say. "Levi," he began, "let's forget what just happened. We won't speak of it again. But if you revert to your old ways one more time, I will throw you into handcuffs myself and take you to the cell next to Hersh. You're not in the underground any more, you're not the thug you once were with no respect for authority. I know you better than that. So start acting like a Captain and not a love sick teenager." Those last words hit a nerve and a steely glare met a steady cobalt one, a slight flash in their clashing eyes. 

"What would you know?" It was all he could think of to say. Shaking his head, Erwin sat down heavily at his desk. 

"Stop sulking, Levi, it doesn't suit you." Dark hair falling over his face, the admonished man looked down to rid his fingernails of non-existent dirt, maintaining his give-a-shit exterior. Satisfied he was clean, he looked back up. 

"Anything else?" The Commander actually chuckled and shook his head. 

"No, you can go and be by her side again." Frozen for a moment, Levi didn't know what to do. He wasn't used to these kind of conversations and it made him throughly uncomfortable. Pulling himself from his thoughts, he walked to the door, leaving a tut as a farewell.

~~~~~~

It had been three hours since you passed out and your temperature had begun to finally drop, breathing returning to normal. Your head thrashed in torturous dreams as Levi tried to hush you, whispering comforting words in the hope that they made it through. Hange ran back and forth from her lab, grabbing different medicines that she thought might help. If you could have seen what was going on, you would have been livid with yourself for being the weakling. It was not something you were accustomed to and it made you feel useless. The woman entered the bedroom once more and sat next to your other carer. 

"She'll be ok, don't worry." Levi grunted with distaste.

"I'm not worried, you shit. It's just tiresome having to look after these brats." She grinned, watching him stroke your hair, actions totally betraying his words. Devoid of any wish other than that of your well being, he carried on with his gentle touch, not giving a fuck about what the person beside him might think.

Suddenly you gasped, breath drawing in deeply as if you had been drowning and your eyes shot open. Sitting up abruptly, you stared at the two in front of you with fear on your face. Levi looked concerned and grasped your hands tightly. "What is it (F/N)?" asked Hange softly. You gulped audibly, and spoke. 

"Someone's going to try and kill me next week."


	8. Betrayal

"How could you know that (F/N)?" whispered Hange. Levi looked down as you laid back on the bed, head spinning. 

"I just do." You had no other explanation. He nodded, trusting your instinct. 

"Well Erwin's plan can fuck off." Confusion washed over you, having no idea of any plans or even how long you had been out for. Slowly you tried to sit up, a strong hand helping you. Keeping your grip in his, Levi began to tell you about everything that had happened, Hange adding with glee all the bits about Erwin telling him off for having personal feelings, the strokes on your hair, looking after you. You blushed at those parts, but her expression was not one of gossip, it was like she'd found her new favourite romance novel.

"Oi shitty glasses, fuck off." It didn't bother her, just made her grin even more. You smiled up at them and squeezed the hand in yours tightly. 

"I'm going to need to train. Alana rightly pointed out that I'll be out of physical shape, I haven't trained for ages." Grey eyes pinned you down with their ferocious gaze. 

"You're not saying you agree with that shit for brains, are you? Seriously (F/N), you have to stay hidden. Let me take care of the fucking traitor." You sat up further, ignoring pain and stared defiantly at him. 

"I will not be a coward, Levi. I will not be weak again. This is my fight, my issue and I will face it." Your words came out icy cool, that same sense of being strong running in waves and you heard Hange snort, two frowns now turned to her. Laughing, she waved her hand. 

"It's just so funny," she started. "You're both as bad as each other." She moved round to check your temperature and pulse. Satisfied, she ordered you to take bed rest, proper rest. Eyebrows wiggled coyly as she directed her command more to Levi than you.

"Why are you still here, don't you have to go take a shit or something?" he snarled. Hange made her way out the room and you called after her, thanking her for the care. Hearing the door shut, the man turned to you again. 

"(F/N), I can't let you do this. I've lost too many people already." His eyes clouded at the thought of his friends, his squad. "And I am not prepared to lose you to these fucking idiots, or anyone for that matter." He pulled you up into a fierce embrace. You didn't like the sorrow that flowed from him and felt the pain that weighed on his heart. It didn't change how you felt though, you were going to face your enemy. Whispering into his neck, you chose your words carefully. 

"Help me train, Levi. You know how strong I am and I want to show you I'm not some weak idiot who can't look after herself." His grip tightened and a shaky breath sounded from his lips as you spoke softly again. "Let me deal with my demons. I will come back to you, I promise." Both of you knew promises in this world often would be broken, unintentionally, but the power in your voice made him snap out of his sullen mood.

Holding you in front of him, Levi smirked lightly. "Ok, you've got a deal, brat. But not until you can at least stand up on your own without me having to catch your sorry ass." Pouting playfully, your spirits felt lifted and a desire to fight burned brightly in your eyes. 

"I am so going to beat you down, Ackerman," you growled with devious intent. Ignoring doctors orders, you set about proving to Levi that you were strong enough to begin training, showing him exactly what your body was capable of in a variety of different positions.

~~~~~~

You punched the bag in the gymnasium with anger, thinking about how these people had come into your life uninvited and you were sure as hell going to make them leave. The familiar feel of bandages round your hands, you continued to awaken your muscles on day three of training. Levi stood by the window gazing out, mind wandering to his recent conversation with Erwin and Hange. The Commander agreed with you, but the woman was not as convinced that you were well enough. A small snort had met her concern as he had told her that you were determined and certainly shown that you were ready. He didn't elaborate on how, leaving that thought out there for them to draw whatever conclusions they wanted to.

His musings turned to events a few days ago, those where you did indeed prove you could withstand physical exertion. Levi's lips twitched as he recalled how you had taken charge and thought there was probably no part of him you hadn't shown keen attention to. A growing raw lust filled him once more as he turned to watch you laying into the leather. Walking over, he took off his jacket, placing it neatly on a table and loosened his shirt. "(F/N)." He got your attention as you saw him prowling over, seemingly undressing as he went. 

"Not here, Levi!" you squeaked, looking around with shock. 

"Get your brain out the gutter, brat. You need to spar. Go." 

Taking up your stances, you circled each other like prey, watching for any sign of intentions. He moved first and you caught his punch, throwing him over by his arm onto the floor. He was back up in a split second. "Nice move, (L/N). Too bad it didn't work." Your turn to attack. A punch was landed in his gut but it had absolutely no effect, as expected. Hitting Levi was pointless, you had to take him down with skill not strength. It brought back fond memories for you both, hours spent inside with one another as your abilities were honed.

Neither of you were able to take the other down despite numerous attempts until you saw an opening. His arm had come round to try and grab your neck and you seized it with lightning speed. Using momentum, you brought yourself round and down so your back was against his chest and threw him to the floor, but this time you followed him, legs either side of his body, hands pinning his wrists.

Panting, you grinned but in the back of your mind you knew he had let you take the advantage, just like he did years ago. His face was, as always, unreadable, not a single bead of sweat or change in his breathing. How does he do it? You looked at at the man below, frowning. "You didn't have to let me win again, you know." Lips twitched and a gleam flashed in his eyes as he glanced down. 

"Oh, but I did (F/N)." You looked to where his stare landed, realising the vest you had pulled on to train in was out of place, revealing much more than was necessary. Blushing, you glared up, about to make some sort of dirty comment but you were cut off by the door opening.

"Captain? I have..." Jean stopped mid sentence, gaping at the scene he had walked in on. He couldn't figure out why you were straddling Levi on the floor. A spark of jealousy ran through him and he tried to gather his thoughts. 

"Tch." Your temporary adversary scowled as he pushed you off him with ease and you stayed sat on the floor, slightly amused by Jean's face. It was priceless. You wiped sweat from your forehead and picked yourself up, sparring partner walking over to the tall man. 

"What's the matter? I would have thought you were used to seeing women pinning down men in training." Hitting a nerve, he watched the youth stiffen as he saluted sullenly. Levi stared at him with disinterest, waiting for the message he had come to deliver. 

"Sir, Erwin requests your presence, Sir." Grumbling, the one addressed nodded and came back over, speaking in a quiet voice. 

"We have to go. That big bastard wants to see me and I'm not leaving you here with him. I can smell the fucking dirty testosterone from here." You raised your brows. 

"Not jealous are we, Captain?" You purred the last word, sending Levi's lust sky high once more. Showing nothing, he simply growled back at you. 

"Fuck off. But you will be calling me that again tonight, (F/N), I guarantee it."

~~~~~~

You made your way down for breakfast on the fated day, thoughts running through your head from recent events. Erwin had quite correctly surmised that the traitor must be from your intake, as no one from a previous recruit group would have known who you were - they had joined too early to be part of it. That was a scary thought, but it narrowed the potentials down to eleven. You'd done as much training as possible and had indeed shouted the word Captain at some point during the last few days. Maybe more than once, a thought that made you grin.

Levi and Hange walked with you and they looked at your smile with confusion. Surely if you were about to be attacked today, you shouldn't exactly be happy about it. A dark voice spoke in your ear. "Any weird behaviour, anything out of the ordinary, you question it without doubt." You turned slightly to reply. 

"I hardly know most of them, that might be difficult." Hange looked shocked. 

"How can you not know them?" She was the social butterfly you realised and understood why your loner tendencies would seem strange to her. 

"I'm not a fan of letting people get close." Not knowing how to respond, she just patted your head like you were a toddler.

Walking through the large doors, you behaved as normal, grabbing food and sitting with your two friends. Glancing up, you saw Levi's intense stare running over every soul in the room. Your own nerves were on edge, sparks running through your body as if you might begin to shake at any moment. Trying to act natural, you chatted along with Alana and Jared, listening to what they had been up to. 

"Oh (F/N), you missed it," began Jared. "We went out to the nearest town yesterday. Actually, I got you something, do you want to come and get it after breakfast?" Cynical alarm bells rang. Sure, you called him your friend but you didn't really know each other that well and you reckoned certainly not well enough to be buying gifts.

"Oh, thank you Jared, that's really kind! I just want to get some training in this morning first after being stuck in that lab again, can I come up before lunch?" That would buy you some time. He smiled, nodding and got up to leave. You didn't want to do it, but you had to - searching around in his mind, you saw calm colours and shapes and nonsense words. None were threatening but one was prominent - strawberries. Ooh, he got me strawberries! Pushing the initial excitement away, you thought that he was probably not plotting against you after all.

As your tall friend left the hall, Levi's eyes drilled holes into the back of the man's head. He was on his squad, granted, but he wouldn't drop his guard just due to that fact. He turned to where you sat, watching you talking, feeling a deep anger that this was happening. It bothered him that you had to be the one to take on Alfonz eventually and it bothered him that here you were, sat in the middle of all these people and not knowing which one intended you harm. He watched carefully as you and Alana stood, not wanting to follow too closely behind but also aching to just run and grab you and take you somewhere safe.

You walked outside into the warm sunshine, turning your head up to catch the rays. You'd missed the feeling of natural light on your skin and a light breeze in your hair. You felt no effects of the fever that had gripped you last week and if it wasn't for your gnawing anticipation, this moment would have been perfect. Leaves rustled in the trees and the buzz of gathered bodies on the sparring ground added to your feeling of calm. You knew that if you turned now, you would see your three temporary bodyguards - your lover, your most recent friend and your Commander. It made you smile lightly to imagine them hanging back, trying to look as natural as possible.

Pulling you from your thoughts, Alana touched your arm lightly. "So (F/N), erm, Jean told us all quite the story yesterday about a certain provocative situation he witnessed." Oh hell no. Concentrate on the sun, the breeze, the leaves, Levi's hands on you.....shit. Suppressing your blush, you turned to her with a neutral expression. 

"Trust him to turn it into something dirty," you began. "We were just sparring and he pretty much let me win anyway." She frowned. 

"Why would he let you win? He's a hard ass?" Quickly, you formed a lie and it bothered you just how easy it was. 

"I think he felt sorry for me, being stuck with Hange for all that time." Not sure if she bought it, you glanced sideways at her, only to see her staring at where Levi was standing. 

"I wouldn't mind pinning him down myself," she mumbled. Snapping out of it, she turned back to you and dug an elbow in your ribs. You were a bit surprised at what she had said, as she was such a tom boy that she never mentioned men in any capacity unless it was to gloat about beating them in training.

Unease crept over you as you were aware of people coming closer, almost caging the two of you in. The atmosphere was claustrophobic as you looked up to see some of the others that had graduated along with you. You knew no names and felt a bit bad about it. Perhaps you should have tried to be a bit more sociable back then. Words were spoken at you from both mouths and minds, sending your senses into a spinning, sickly feeling.

"Hey girls!"

Blue colours, thoughts of food.

"Haven't seen you in ages, how are you?"

Yellow. Fear of the punishment that was coming after knocking over a bucket of dirty water in front of Levi.

"Do you want to spar?"

Green. Lust.

"How about we all get together before lunch and catch up?"

Red. Loneliness.

You were getting flustered, not knowing who's words matched with which thoughts. Alana looked at you with concern, seeing your discomfort. Out of nowhere, one thought ran clear and loud. It was rage. not knowing where it came from, you turned to everyone, feverishly searching faces for the emotion's owner. And then you knew who it was. Alana. She rushed in front of you protectively and pointed at the men gathered. 

"Lay off will you? She's not been outside in the fresh air for ages, give it a rest and let her enjoy some sunshine, yea?" Shocked faces looked down on you both and you felt your love for your friend as a tight ball in your chest. It was her who had been angry, but it was at them, not you. Muttering, the men walked away reluctantly and began to push each other, bickering over whose fault it was that they had been sent away from the two attractive women. "Jeez, boys!" she breathed in exasperation. You laughed nervously. 

"Thanks Alana, that was all a bit weird, wasn't it?" She shot you a dirty look. 

"They're probably on heat or something," she giggled. Laughing, the two of you made your way to the middle of the area to begin some good natured hand to hand combat with each other.

Erwin placed his hand on a smaller shoulder as he sensed the angry man was getting ready to fight. "Don't worry, they were just being friendly." Levi did not look impressed, a full blown scowl on his face, topped off with a snarl on his lips. 

"Friendly my ass, hormonal more like," he grumbled. Hange grinned and shook her head. The three of them watched as you and Alana pulled off some impressive moves, neither one of you backing down or able to defeat the other. Your current tutor studied your technique closely, picking up on points that he would be discussing with you later. Not that you were sloppy, but there were some imperfections that he just had to correct.

The day moved on slowly and your nerves had calmed slightly. Jared had snuck the small box of strawberries to you at lunch so no one else would see them and want in on the action. You smiled and gave him a look of warm thanks. Sharing them between the three of you, you began to wonder if it had all just been part of your fever, as the feeling of dread dissipated. "Hey (F/N)," said Alana. "Shall we get those guys back for dribbling all over us like fools?" Mischief glinted in her eyes, a look you had seen many times before. Leaning closer, she outlined her plans. The ones that had crowded round you were going to be training with their gear after lunch and would be heading to pick up their equipment from the stores. She wanted to hide in there and ambush them with buckets of water to cool them down. You grinned with evil thoughts. That sounded like the perfect thing to ease your tension.

The two of you said goodbye to Jared and ran off holding hands into the store room just beside the mess hall. His eyes watched closely as you shut the door.

Levi sat up straight. Where did (F/N) go? She was there a minute ago? Sensing his movement, Erwin again turned to placate him. "She ran off into the stores with her friend. From the looks of it, they're planning a prank or something." The body by his side remained tense, ready to run at the slightest hint of danger. "And we can't very well go and interrupt a bit of fun, can we?" 

"I give them five fucking minutes then I'm over there."

You gathered buckets and began to search the room for where it would be best to hide. "Hey Alana, this would be good, don't you think?" you asked, pointing at a space behind a crate. But there was no answer. It was quite dark in here but you were sure she had followed you into the room. Dread set in again as you feared for your friend, that they had got to her and hurt her, or worse. Body on edge, you instinctively raised your fists slightly, ready to fight.

Pain. Something heavy hit the side of your head and you spun to see what it was and who had thrown it. Dangerous eyes peered out from a dark corner, sizing you up, looking at you with pure hatred. Stepping out of the shadows, you gasped at the person who stood before you. "No," you whispered. "Not you." Hands shot out and you defended against the blows, landing a solid punch on your attacker's chin. They stumbled backwards but regained composure in seconds. Stalking round each other, the figure spoke to you. 

"I'm going to make it look like all this heavy stuff came crashing down. Crushing you. I might leave you alive but mortally wounded so you can draw your last agonising breaths in front of the people you love the most. Stupid really, letting people in. You should have known it would all end in tears. You're not allowed to love."

That roused you, fury running strong. How dare they tell you that you weren't allowed to love? With your heart full of those you held close and those you had lost along the way, you laid punch after punch and kick after kick, rage taking over blindly. You took some hits yourself but you didn't feel a damn thing, being far beyond the point of pain. Screaming, you floored your opponent, showering strong fists to their face until they were almost unconscious. You stopped, grabbing something from your boot. Leaning down, you snarled your words. "I am allowed to love. And I will love." You raised the small blade in your hand, ready to make the fatal blow.

The door opened behind you as your three superiors rushed in, having heard the commotion and stopped in their tracks. You froze. Were you going to be a killer again? You weren't sure. The hatred inside you had turned you into something you no longer recognised. There was a click as Erwin closed the small entrance and he spoke gently to you. "(F/N)? Put the knife down. Let's deal with this in the proper way. We don't need any more death."

Your heart was beating wildly and you struggled to hear him over the rush of blood thrumming in your ears. Gripping the blade tightly, you sat on the edge of sanity. Your eyes were wild and you were covered in blood from the intense punches you had thrown.

Another voice cut through the room. Levi. "(F/N), it's over. Come back to me." He had recognised that you were no longer yourself, lost in a fog of anger and pain and he didn't like the look on your face. Not one bit.

His words snapped you out of it, blade clattering to the floor. Looking down, you saw the face of your would-be assassin below you. They stared up with one eye - the other had puffed shut in a purple splash of bruising. Blood and sweat mixed on their features, stuck to their hair.

"Why?" you whispered. Thick, manic laughter filled the tiny room as the person pinned beneath you shook their head. 

"Because you have to die, (F/N). You still will, just not by my hand. I must say I was looking forward to it, to see your life squeezed from your body, to see the look on their faces," they pointed at the others in the room. "But it wasn't to be."

Before you could do anything, they grabbed your blade and drew it harshly over their own neck, dark warm blood pouring from the gaping wound. Chokes and gurgles ceased as you looked down on the now lifeless body. You couldn't grasp what had just happened in this room, all in the space of five minutes. Staring at the puddle of red on the floor, you were stuck. You couldn't move your limbs. All you could do was look down at the person who had just slit their own throat in front of you.

"No, Alana, why did it have to be you?"

~~~~~~

Standing once more in Levi's office, he pulled you into a tight embrace. He was losing you. He could see the emotional struggle you were having, it was all over your face and he could bet that this whole shitty situation would cause you to withdraw back into your shell, shutting everyone out so you didn't have to deal with any more loss. You hadn't spoken since your last sorrowful words to your dead friend and it scared him. Pulling away, you smiled at him. It was the most fake show of lightness he had ever seen. You walked off to shower the blood and memories from your skin and he turned to lean back against the wall.

Hearing the water turn on, he slid down the wall to the floor, arms resting loosely on his knees and bowed his head, dark hair falling over his face. He felt useless, he couldn't protect you when you needed him. Levi knew you were strong, however he wished so fucking hard that you hadn't witnessed Alana killing herself. That's what had thrown you over the edge and that's when he felt you crawl inside, shutting mental doors. It would never be the same again and he slammed his fist into the floor, angry with himself for not reading the situation sooner. Humanities fucking strongest, ha, I can't even protect one woman.

Levi's thoughts were so dark that he didn't hear the water stop, didn't notice you standing in front of him wrapped in a towel and dripping water on the floor. "Levi?" Your whisper sent his head snapping up and he looked into your (e/c) eyes. A fire burnt behind them and he wondered if he'd read your earlier emotions all wrong.

You stared down at the man on the floor, at how totally defeated he looked and it made your heart break. The usually strong Levi was a picture of vulnerability, almost curled up against the wall like a scared child. You stepped softly closer and sat with him, gathering the seemingly smaller human in your arms and holding fiercely on to him. Gently pushing his head onto your chest, you felt him wrap his arms around you. "Levi, you didn't hear what she said to me in there," you began. "She told me I wasn't allowed to love. So I told that fucking bitch how wrong she was. How I was allowed to and I will love." You pulled his head tighter to you. "You hear that, Levi? That noise? As long as my heart is beating in my body, I will love. You told me to come back to you and I did."

He lifted his gaze to look deep into yours and saw the defiance in your face.

"I. Will. Fucking. Love," you whispered ferociously, power behind each word as something came to the fore, a realisation that had begun years ago, only you'd never noticed before. "And I love you, Levi." Bolstered by the passionate words, he grabbed your hands and held them as tight as he could without hurting. 

"I love you too, (F/N)," he whispered. "So don't ever fucking scare me like that again, you little shit." You laughed at how such a loving moment could be ruined with one line. No, it wasn't ruined actually, it was fucking perfect, and you wouldn't want him any other way.


	9. Letting Off Steam

Fading light shone lazily through the window, casting shadows. You lay next to Levi, naked body cuddled up against his. Thoughts returned to your fight earlier and your friend's death. No, she wasn't your friend, never had been apparently. Regardless, the pain of seeing her slice her own flesh like that had hit you hard. At first you were back to where you were before when you found yourself alone under ground, retreating into your own mind, virtual steel walls placed around. But as you had washed the blood that belonged to you both off your body, the words that you had spoken so strongly came flooding back. You made a resolve to stand tall and firm, to raise above, however you hadn't realised how transparent you had shown your first emotions and were utterly shocked at what this had done to Levi. The image of him almost curled up on the cold stone floor was haunting and you promised you would never make him feel that way again. Struggling to erase that picture, you were dragged from your thoughts by your name being called.

"Want to talk about it?" You turned to the man you loved and stroked his cheek gently with your thumb. Sighing deeply, you spoke. 

"Not really. Only one thing though." He looked at you to continue as your heart pounded in your chest. With a shaky voice, you whispered to him. "The pain I put you through is inexcusable. I can't get rid of the thought of seeing you sitting on that floor and it breaks my heart." He looked surprised and opened his mouth to speak. You cut him off, having more to say. "It won't happen again, Levi. Never. I'm determined to be strong and I won't put up barriers between you and me ever again. I'm sorry."

His expression went from shocked to something resembling annoyance. "(F/N), don't ever apologise to me for having emotions. After what we both went through in each of our own crappy lives down in that shit hole city and with everything that's happened up here, I think you will agree that we are both pretty fucked?" You smiled despite the anger you still held for yourself. "Some things affect us, sometimes badly. We have to move on, it's how we survive." Listening to his words, you realised it's probably the most he'd said in one go in his entire life. "I thought I'd lost you to darkness. Seeing you so fragile almost destroyed me." Holding your breath, you were in awe as he actually spoke about his feelings. "But we both moved on. We were strong." You didn't say a word for ages, as if your voice would scare away what he had just said, so he spoke again. "(F/N), I don't want you dwelling on what happened today. You have to keep that same defiance and fucking fight. Ok, brat?" Looking up at him, you nodded once in strong affirmation.

The man sighed and pulled you close. "Good. I didn't want to have to repeat myself." You slapped his arm lightly in mock anger and he lifted your chin, placing a kiss on your lips, humming into your soft mouth. "Now stop making me talk about feelings and shit." Smooth. Subtle Levi covering his emotional tracks. Before you could say anything back, a knock sounded on the main door. "Fuck's sake, what now?" he grumbled, climbing out of bed. You clung onto his hand to try to stop him leaving and he looked down. "Don't make this harder than it already is," he groaned, pulling on a casual top and trousers hastily. Bare footed, he walked to answer the visitor.

"How's she doing?" asked Hange. Levi pulled her inside and shut the door. He rubbed a hand over eyes circled with heavy bags, darker than usual. 

"She's ok. Battered and bruised, but ok." The woman nodded her approval. 

"Erwin's addressing everyone soon, you'd better come down. He's going to tell most of the truth." 

"I'll get (F/N)," he said and went to walk off but turned to look at Hange. "You waiting for permission to leave or something?" She glanced down then spoke. 

"Look after her, Levi," she said softly and left, leaving him standing for a moment in silence.

"I'm trying."

~~~~~~

Your eyes scanned over the people in the mess hall, all sitting around after having eaten their evening meal. You saw a few familiar faces and walked over to sit next to Eren who was alone. Levi glared, but said nothing as he moved to join Erwin and Hange. "How is (F/N), Levi?" asked the Commander. The reply he had given earlier was repeated and the tall man nodded slowly. "I won't be divulging all information to them. Just what needs to be known. But I am keen to have a small squad formed that we can trust for any related missions in the future." The grumpy male grunted in acknowledgement and watched the crowd, looking for anyone to reprimand. He was in that kind of mood. He saw faces turning as you walked through the benches, eyes passing over your blatant injuries. Whispers started.

Sitting, you smiled to the brunette by your side; you hadn't seen him in what seemed like years. "How are you, Eren?" you enquired. He looked over to reply and a look of shock crossed his face. 

"(F/N)!" he squealed. "What happened to you?" True concern washed over his face as he placed his hand on yours. 

"It's ok, I'm fine," you smiled. "I think that's what Erwin's got us here for so I'll let him tell you." He nodded, accepting your answer without complaint. 

"Are you still, you know, doing your thing?" he asked quietly. His description made you laugh as you nodded back at him. 

"Yes, but we haven't tried it on anything big for a while. I have a feeling that will be coming soon. Still doing yours?" He grinned and puffed his chest, ready to regale you with tales of success but before he could continue, Jared sat on the other side of you, eyes wide. 

"I knew something went down in that room but I didn't realise you were going to look like you'd spent all day being punched by a titan, (F/N)." You presumed that the area had been closed off after the fight to avoid any spectators or idle gossip and you opened your mouth, but Erwin cleared his throat and stood.

"I've gathered you here for another rumour control. As explained before, there were enemies amongst us." He let that sink in. "Some of you may be aware that there was an incident in one of the store rooms on this floor. Let me assure you that the threat was dealt with swiftly and efficiently."

He made eye contact with you, something others had noticed and once more, gazes were on you. "We understand that there are no known infiltrators now, both having been detained." You were relieved that he didn't mention how Alana had died. "But please stay on your guard as you go about your duties. Consider it business as usual. Train hard, work hard. Expeditions beyond the walls are imminent." That sent whispers through the hall, effectively taking the attention off yesterday and you silently thanked Erwin for it. "For tonight, we have received a special supply run. Enjoy yourselves, but any foolish action will be dealt with appropriately." Confused faces met his, but realisation set in as Jacob revealed a shipment of alcohol and sweet treats. Cheers rang through the hall as people moved to obtain some rare luxuries.

Jared leant over to you and Eren. "(F/N)? Where's Alana?" The question you knew would come and you'd been given the green light to elaborate. 

"She was the traitor, Jared." Your companion's eyes widened in disbelief as a look of disgust crossed your expression. "Believe me, I was just as shocked," you growled.

On another table, Levi turned to Erwin. "Are you sure this is a good idea? Drunken cadets?" Smiling, the Commander replied. 

"I think everyone deserves to let off a bit of steam. You included, Levi. Don't be a spoil sport." With that, he stood and went to get himself a drink. Hange had already been to get hers and brought a large cup of wine for Levi. He looked at it in disdain. 

"Sorry short stuff, they don't exactly have expensive glasses or dinner settings in this place." She laughed, swigging at her drink and with a sigh, he took a delicate sip.

Eren had been whisked away by Mikasa before you could really speak to him more and Jared brought you to the table that your squad leader and lover sat at, joining some others from his team who were there also. You were introduced to Paul and Moreth, two bulky men with good natured faces. "Woah, you look like you took one hell of a beating!" laughed Paul. Not sure what to say to that, you turned to Jared. He whispered something to his friend, and you saw the man's eyes widen. "Shit, sorry (F/N), I thought maybe you'd just got on the wrong side of our Captain or something!" Alcohol had loosened his tongue already, not thinking his words through. Levi's gaze slowly turned, eyebrow slightly arched but he said nothing, just stood and walked off. You were a bit surprised and if you admitted it, upset, looking forward to spending some time with familiar faces around you.

He returned shortly after though, placing a large cup full of deep red liquid in front of you. Everyone looked up at him as he moved round the table to sit back where he had risen from. He nodded at you and raised his own mug. Slowly, everyone at the table followed suit, silently toasting you and the victory you had won. If only they all knew what had happened. Not wanting to be rude, you raised yours to them and took a big gulp, knowing that Levi hadn't meant it in the same way the others had taken it. It had been a long, long time since you had tasted alcohol and the tangy taste washed down your throat with familiarity. When you weren't stealing or training in the underground city that used to be your home, you drank.

A couple of hours later and most of the few people remaining were either blind drunk or had a strong resistance to the substance and were still able to be coherent. The others had all given up and crawled to bed, or been carried in Eren's instance, by Mikasa, no less. He would not live that one down for a long time, you thought. Your table still contained you, Levi, Paul and Hange. Your lover now sat next to you and Hange on the other side, her head resting on your shoulder as she muttered words that were not understandable in any language. You thought you should probably get her to bed, but you were actually enjoying yourself. Paul sat opposite, telling slurred stories about life under the rule of his Captain and how much stuff he has to clean as part of his duties.

You looked round to see you were the only four left in the hall. Legs hidden deep underneath the large table, you leant forward with your hands on your chin, a faint buzz hanging over you like a comfort blanket. You felt a hand on your left thigh and jumped. No one noticed. Paul's head was now on the wooden surface and you turned to Levi, a sparkle in your eyes. He smirked, a slight flush on his cheeks from the wine. In that moment, you thought of how adorable he looked, eye lids half way down and head tilted slightly. "Shall we sort these two light weights out?" you asked, pointing to your now comatose companions. He shrugged. 

"No, let's leave them here. That'll be quite fucking amusing in the morning." You grinned and detached Hange from your shoulder, laying her head down gently in a mirror image to the man opposite her.

You walked up the stairs and through winding halls, holding a hushed and slightly drunken conversation. You had needed this, both of you, a means of release from the events you had been party to. Reaching his door, he picked you up and threw you over his shoulder, making you squeal with laughter. Luckily most of the occupants of the castle were passed out asleep, otherwise they would have surely been woken by the noises that came from Levi's bedroom that night.

~~~~~~

Sore heads were held delicately as people picked over their breakfast the next day. You felt slightly smug as you walked in, absolutely fine and fresh as a daisy, skipping over to Jared who was with Paul and Moreth, all of them looking like death incarnate. "Why did you leave me down here with that woman," groaned Paul. "Everyone thinks we, you know, got up to stuff!" Laughing, you slapped him on the back, making him shout out with the pain he felt in his skull. Levi had sat with Erwin, usual tea in hand, his dark eyes looking slightly less bagged that normal. He had actually slept all night after you'd both worn each other out and you were glad; he really did need to have a good rest.

You could see the two of them discussing something, Hange lying next to them with her head on the table, Jacob rubbing circles on her back to try to ease her discomfort. Erwin caught your eye and beckoned you over. Saying bye to the delicate men, you made your way through the benches, Levi watching you the whole way, staring at the way your hips swayed around the tables. As invited, you sat next to the Commander and he turned to you. "We will start experiments on titans tomorrow, (F/N), if you're able to?" Your eyes were wide and your heart pounded as the pale man looked downright annoyed at the whole thing, but you hadn't expected anything less. 

Nodding once, you let Erwin know you were ready for this. "If you don't mind me asking, who will be coming out with me?" You were a bit concerned about getting anyone hurt if it failed. Looking thoughtful, the blonde spoke again. 

"Hange, obviously, but she will mostly be there to observe. Levi will be an asset you don't want to leave behind, as he'll be able to take down more titans than anyone should it be required." All you heard was tut. Rolling his eyes, Erwin continued. "And I was thinking of a few strong soldiers that we can all trust. Paul and Jared have proved themselves in training and have a good rapport with all of you now, I think. And Jean, who is seasoned in battle. Also, I would like Eren to attend, as extra back up."

You thought over the selection and whilst you agreed that they sounded like a good squad, it worried you about putting people close to you in danger. Almost sensing your misgivings, Erwin turned to you once more. "Don't worry (F/N), we will take this as a controlled experiment as much as we can." Slightly reassured, you nodded and wondered about what the other men would think about why they were out there. 

"What are we telling them?" Levi leant over his superior to answer you. 

"We'll get them together this evening. Probably make them shit bricks with fear." Giggling, you tried to think what their reaction would be and stood to return to your breakfast and taunt your hungover comrades, but you were stopped as Erwin spoke quietly. 

"Oh, and by the way, not all of us were blind drunk last night and not all of us lost the use of our ears." You turned beetroot red and wanted the ground to swallow you up there and then. It was too much to take in, so you ran away like a little school girl. Levi turned with a blank expression. 

"You listening in on people's private business now, you dirty old man?" Smirking slightly, the Commander chuckled. 

"Levi, my office is not too far away from yours, remember. And I didn't exactly intend on hearing your, shall we say, adventures?" Emotionless save for the glint of mischief in his eyes, Levi got up to leave, but leant over his friend's shoulder first and spoke in his ear. 

"I would like to say it won't happen again, Sir, but you know I'm not one for lying." As he walked off, he wondered where that had come from. It really wasn't like him to make dirty remarks about himself, he usually did it at other people's expense.

~~~~~~

The assembled special squad stood or sat in Erwin's office, three of them looking totally confused. Still a bit hungover, they gaped at you incredulously. "You didn't, erm, read my, erm..." Jean trailed off and you smiled sweetly at him. 

"No, no, Jean. Not intentionally, anyway." Face flushed, he turned from your gaze as the one in charge spoke up. 

"I know you will have questions and you will get answers. But for now, we need to discuss strategy." He pulled a map out and everyone crowded round the desk to get a view.

You wouldn't be going too far out, just to the nearest forest and would be sat up in the trees, as far out of harm's way as you could be. Hange and Levi would be with you to assist in case of blindness as they were aware of the signs that pointed towards your collapse. Jean, Paul and Jared would be placed at intervals after having lured titans in. Eren would keep watch and transform on Levi's signal and on his signal alone. It would take place as close to sundown as possible, taking the chance of being attacked as far down as possible.

You were nervous but excited to be going outside the walls once more. The meeting had ended and you all left to join the evening meal. Jean caught up with you and grabbed your arm lightly. "(F/N), I think what you do is incredible. I'm honoured to be part of this." Levi walked by at that point and growled. 

"Keep it in your pants." He kept going and you laughed quietly at the teen's red face. 

"What is it with him and you, he seems so protective?" You shrugged, keeping your response as light and breezy sounding as you could. 

"We've known each other a long time, so…" He didn't seem convinced, thinking back to the scene in the gym but kept quiet, silently raging inside with jealousy for the dark haired man that got to spend so much time with you.

You sat to eat and Eren placed himself next to you, chatting hurriedly before someone else came along. "(F/N), can I ask you something?" You hummed, waiting for him to continue. He blushed. "You know when you, like, were in the underground? Were you and…him really...?" Giggling, you smiled at his query and shook your head. 

"No Eren, he was just a friend." Something in your expression made him question your answer. Boldly, before he could think it through, he continued. 

"But you are now, yea?" That shocked you, turning to him with a slight frown. 

"Why do you say that?" He shrugged, eyes darting around the room. 

"I just got the feeling you were, that's all." You hadn't denied it, he thought, face flushing at the thought once more. Before it could get more awkward, two others in on the plan joined you. Silence hung over the small group until Jared spoke up. 

"This is really fucked up, you know? I mean, how can you do that? It's crazy?" It wasn't said with malice, just pure interest. 

"I wish I knew, Jared. It's quite annoying sometimes." He thought about your words and an evil look crossed his face. 

"Bet it's fun though, (F/N)? You get to know what everyone's thinking!" You laughed lightly at his intent, and brought him close in a conspiring manner. 

"Oh you have no idea." His eyes widened, wondering what you may have heard him think. You hadn't really read him that often and never got anything important, but watching him squirm was priceless.

After dinner, Levi had followed you back at a distance as usual and caught you up at the end of the hallway. "You know I don't need escorting around anymore?" He didn't look round when you spoke and huffed. As you got to his door and walked in, he closed it harshly and pinned you down with his eyes. You were in trouble, but you didn't know why. As he glared at you, it became obvious that he wasn't going to start the conversation, so you tried. "What's wro…" You were cut off before you could finish. 

"I know you don't need a fucking escort, you shit. Did it occur to you that I like walking with you?" Oh crap. You hadn't meant anything by your earlier comment, it was more along the lines of not wanting him to feel imposed upon. 

"Levi," you began, moving closer to him. He refused to meet your gaze, staring over your head and out the window. "Oi!" You clicked your fingers at him. He looked down at you, angry with your annoying gesture. "I didn't mean it like that and you know it. Don't have a hissy fit. You do have to think though, is Erwin going to let me carry on staying here?" He had considered it, but didn't give a shit what the large man said. He was more concerned about your attitude. 

"Hissy fit?" he spat, face lowering down to hover in front of yours. "You think this is a hissy fit, brat?" Feeling bold, you shrugged. 

"Looks like one to me." In a swift movement you were face down on the desk, arm twisted painfully to your back. His breath was on your neck, warm and sensual. 

"If you want a tantrum, I'll show you one." Struggling under his grip, you brought a foot up and kicked his shin. It did nothing, obviously. He flipped you over so he could loom over, rage in his eyes. "Don't fucking kick me again." His voice betrayed his features as he had turned his best silky drawl on. 

"Or what?" you breathed, smirking. He scooped you up bridal style, taking you to the bed. Throwing you on it roughly, he looked down as he pulled off the black civilian top he'd worn today and the light from a lamp danced over his muscles, torso twitching with pure sexual intent. You bit your lip as he growled at you in that same voice. 

"Oh (F/N), that was such a fucking stupid question, which you are about to find out the answer to." He pulled off his belt, whipping it dangerously on the leather of his boot. "Are you ready for your punishment?"

So much for a good night's sleep, thought Erwin, stuffing his head under the pillow.


	10. Despair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nearly done moving this one across, got a bit lazy and haven't made a huge amount of edits. Not one of my best but my first canon attempt from a while ago!

Birds sang above as a breeze ran through the trees, softly touching your skin. You were mucking out the stables, readying the horses you would need for this evening's mission. A story had been fabricated to explain your outing and word had been put out that you were going to recover some vital intelligence that had been lost on the last trip outside the walls. Brushing down your favourite beast, you whispered in low, soothing tones. As you rubbed the steed's legs, your shirt sleeves rode up, revealing faint red marks around your wrists. You smiled as you thought of how you had been tied up by Levi's belt last night, secured to the bed as he did unbelievable things to your body. Given the cuts and bruises you already sported, you hoped people would presume you obtained them during the stand off with the traitor.

Aware of a presence approaching, you turned. "Hey Hange, what's new?" you asked your friend. She shrugged. 

"Nothing much, but I'm so excited to see what you can do!" she squeaked. Getting closer, you looked to her with concern. 

"How's your head?" She unconsciously touched her wound. 

"I'm ok, takes more than an explosion to take me down!" The woman had such vibrancy, it reminded you of Isabel in some ways, a child-like lust for life. She seemed to change just then, turning serious and looking around. Coming in close, she spoke quietly. "(F/N), do you ever worry about getting pregnant?" You were thrown. This was not the light, pre-mission conversation you expected. Turning your full attention to her, you shook your head. 

"No, I never have." It was the truth. You'd been with men before and never fallen pregnant, so you began to think you were barren. She nodded, the same serious expression on her face. 

"Come by my office later. I have something that will stop that possibility temporarily. That is, if it's what you want. We can have a good old girly chat, too!" You smiled at her excitement. 

"Thanks Hange, I will." You gave her a hug and watched as she bounced off.

Sitting in your friend's office later in the afternoon, you shared some brief stories of conquests from the past, or disappointments, as you called them. She had given you a small vial of liquid to take and told you to come back the same time every month to get some more. You didn't ask how it worked, just trusted her. As you drank it down, she asked if you had spoken with Levi about it. Nodding, you swallowed the medicine - he had said nothing when you brought it up, just agreed with a grunting noise.

"(F/N)? Are you scared about the mission?" She looked at you with worry, eyes soft behind her glasses. 

"Yea, a bit."

~~~~~~

Trees approached your line of sight, towering above you in the dying evening sun. Hooves thundered over the slightly wet ground, throwing clumps of dirt in their wake. Green cloaks billowed behind the seven soldiers. "Gear," shouted Levi and gas sounded as hooks were deployed. Moving up into the forest as one body, you all took up position. The two in command landed on a huge branch, backs pressed against the trunk, each of them holding one of your arms tightly as you stood in front of them. Eren took his spot on a tree opposite, eyes darting down to the gathered titans.

The lure had worked. Jared, Paul and Jean appeared from below and came to rest on their own branches, placed at regular intervals in an almost semi circle between you and the shifter. Everyone nodded. You took a deep breath as you felt the grip on your arms increase and heard Levi's voice in your ear. "Go."

Pushing, pleading, demanding attention, you threw your strong thoughts out to the titans below. Go away. Leave this place. Just go fuck off and die somewhere far far away, there's nothing for you here. Go and fade into vapour you big pieces of shit. LEAVE.

On the last word, electricity burnt through you, causing those gripping your arms to release their hold due to the pain. And you fell. In muddy slow motion, almost frame by frame, you reached your arm up as you saw Levi deploying his gear, swooping down. You heard a soft voice in your head. "I told you that you weren't allowed to love." A hand approached yours as you heard the words and everything ceased to exist.

Levi caught your body and held you close, landing on the wet forest floor. He dropped down and laid you across him, head cradled in his left arm, torso across his knees as he took your warm hand. "Ok (F/N), same as before. One squeeze yes, alright?" Nothing. His grip increased. "(F/N), can you hear me? (F/N)?" Terror crept into his previously calm tone and he raised a slightly shaking hand to your face. Realisation hit as he saw that you no longer drew breath. Searching frantically, he found no heart beat and began to shake you lightly.

"(F/N), no, don't do this. No…" He whispered to you, his hands touching your serene cheek, stroking your slightly muddy hair. Minutes passed by slowly and eventually his feverish actions stopped. Placing his left hand behind your head, the other arm around your body, he pulled you in, face bowed down. Onyx hair fell, framing both of your features as Levi gripped onto you in a fierce embrace and he wept quietly. Soundless tears fell, dripping on your face so it looked like both of you were crying.

The others landed softly around you both, looking at the scene with painful sorrow. Hange and Eren's own tears fell as they saw their lifeless friend and their inconsolable companion. Jean gritted his teeth, Paul looked sombre and Jared slowly raised his arms in a salute to his fallen comrade, the others soon following suit.

Levi wanted to scream at the world, shout with such force that all the trees in the forest would explode. He drew in a deep breath, a snarl on his lips and he placed his forehead on yours. All that came out was a low, animalistic groan of pure despair. "No-o, n-n-ooooo, n-n…" It was cut off as a sob tore through his body once more and he screwed his dull grey eyes tightly shut. Silence descended on you all, only faint, occasional whimpers were heard for what seemed like forever.

"I. Will. Love."

Those standing looked around with shock at each other trying to figure out where the voice they heard in their heads had come from. Levi didn't move, having presumed he'd imagined it, then felt your hand grip onto his. Now he was convinced he had actually done it finally, truly gone insane. The last rays of sun danced on the ground through the canopy and he opened his eyes. Silver orbs widened as he saw you looking up at him, (e/c) shimmers in his line of sight. It couldn't be true, it wasn't true. How? You frowned and whispered to him. 

"I'm sorry for scaring you Levi. I broke my promise." A breathy laugh escaped his lips that, luckily, only you heard and he pressed his mouth against yours in a kiss filled with passion, love, relief. He showered you with more, small hungry pecks and laced his fingers into your hair. The feeling of the breath from your nose on his skin was exquisite, signalling a life force he thought had been lost.

The others watched dumbfounded. What they had just witnessed was surely impossible. Joy slowly overcame their confusion as they realised you were alive. Hange grasped her hands to her chest, eyes wide and a dopey grin spread across her face. Eren blushed at the sight of you two tangled together in a loving embrace. Jean's teeth clenched together harder as his thoughts were confirmed by the scene in front of him but even he had to smile. Paul looked downright puzzled, jaw hanging slightly open as Jared smiled widely, shaking his head. Levi pulled back, resting on your forehead once more, staring deeply into your gaze. You stayed like that for a while, stares locked as unspoken feelings passed between you.

Snapping out of his puzzlement, Paul broke the silence. "Err, guys? The titans have gone. And they died, I can see loads of smoke?" Everyone's eyes widened at his revelation and you spoke with words that you were almost scared to believe. 

"Levi, it worked?" He squeezed your hand tightly. 

"It worked. It really worked (F/N)!" You both jumped up and clung together tightly as Hange bundled in and threw her arms around the pair. Pretty soon there was what could only be described as a group hug, made up mainly of grinning faces. 

"Whoever is touching my leg, I will break your fucking fingers," growled Levi. Laughter rang around the forest, a sound never heard outside the walls.

Horses were being gathered and Hange scribbled notes at a blinding speed as she interrogated you. Looking up, she prompted with her next question. "So, no pain, no blindness?" You shrugged as you busied yourself with tightening your straps. 

"No, nothing, I feel fine." She nodded and made a note in her book. 

"Well, this obviously works, but we can't keep doing this if you're going to die every time," she muttered. Levi turned from where he stood by his animal, glaring daggers into her with his gaze. "Sorry, bad choice of words!" You didn't know what had happened back there, but whatever it was, you overcame it. It did concern you that it wouldn't always be that way though, but kept your worries to yourself for now.

The group arrived back at the castle, a feeling of elation amongst you all. As you set about tethering your horse, excited chatter came from the men that stood behind you. No one saw the other male approach, but they sure as hell heard him. "I presume I don't need to tell you to keep your fucking mouths shut." It wasn't a question, it was an order delivered with venom. 

The soldiers straightened and saluted their superior with cries of "No Sir!" and "Of course, Captain!", worried looks crossing their faces. As they felt the short, angry man leave, relief spread over their expressions as they relaxed their postures. Rushing over to you, they were everywhere, patting your back and ruffling your hair that was still full of twigs and leaves and it had started to fall out of the tie you had secured it with. Essentially, you looked like you'd been dragged through a hedge backwards.

"(F/N), that was amazing what you did back there. What did it feel like? Do you feel weird or anything?" asked Jean. You smiled up at his excited face. 

"It felt like I was floating, but really really heavy at the same time. After that, I don't really remember anything until I opened my eyes." He saw a sadness wash over you and glanced nervously to the others. Eren came closer and took your hand. 

"It's ok to be scared, (F/N). I understand." You squeezed back as you knew that he of all people would be able to fathom how overwhelming the power was. You took your leave and wished your friends a good night, making your way inside. Erwin would be receiving your reports tomorrow morning so you climbed the stairs to go and get a good sleep before that ordeal.

Quietly closing the door to Levi's quarters, you heard the sound of water from the shower. Sighing, you stood by a small mirror in the bedroom and started to remove the undergrowth from your hair. You didn't even know how to start the impending conversation with him, unsure of how the events would have affected him. You'd seen his tears, yet had no idea of what lay beneath his usual cool exterior. Nerves balled in your stomach as you felt adrenaline through your veins as the water stopped running. He stepped out, towel around his waist, hair dripping. You stood just staring at each other and it felt like you were about to have the worst conversation in your whole life. His actions surprised you though, as he walked over and curled his strong arms round your waist. His eyes had flashed with silver specks before he pulled you into his chest and you'd seen nothing of the broken man witnessed previously.

"Do you feel ok, (F/N)?" he asked quietly. "Do you need anything?" You shook your head against his warm body, drips of water from his hair reminding you of his earlier tears. Looking up, you spoke with concern in your voice. 

"Do you, Levi?" He stroked your scruffy locks out of your face and smiled. You were not expecting this. His expression showed nothing but kindness and contented thoughts. 

"Only you," he replied. You didn't want to poke at the issue, but you were really confused. He must have sensed this and led you over to sit on the bed. "I held you dead in my arms, (F/N). I grieved for you and it was the worst feeling I have ever experienced. It ripped me apart." You sat still, holding your breath aa he swallowed and continued. "But, you came back to me again. And that moment was full of indescribable joy and that is what I'm clinging to. I don't want to let the darkness in again." Once more you were shocked at how much he spoke candidly. It was very unlike him but you didn't question the honestly. It was a good thing.

You cuddled into him, hearing his slow heart beat and felt him place his chin on the top of your fuzzy hair. "Levi? I can't do that again, can I?" He shook his head slowly. 

"I don't think so, (F/N). It's too much of a risk." You sighed. 

"So all of that elation, all the celebrating, it was all for nothing." He brought your chin up with his hand to look into your eyes. 

"Nothing's ever in vain, (F/N). You never know what might fucking happen. Or what that crazy four eyes will have found out." Smiling, you continued your embrace and stayed locked together for what seemed like eternity.

~~~~~~

You were all assembled in Erwin's office the next morning before breakfast and the feeling of victory hung over most of those present as they thought back to what had happened. That is, until the Commander spoke bluntlh. "So what you're saying is, (F/N), you died?"

An uneasy silence crept into the room. It was evident that most of those gathered hadn't thought beyond the success of your actions in any depth. That was fine with you, it wasn't for them to worry themselves with. The man in charge, however, was troubled. "I see," he continued. "I won't allow you to put yourself through that again, (F/N). It is not a risk I am willing to take. Hange, have you anything to add from your point of view?" The woman rustled through her notes, muttering to herself. Looking up from the book, she explained her findings. 

"I don't know yet, is the honest answer. I would like to do some tests on (F/N) today though, see if I can see anything that would help piece things together?" You nodded slowly. She had already approached you about this and were ok as long as it didn't involve anything like removing organs. Eyes glanced in Levi's direction. Standing against the wall, he turned to look out the window with his usual death stare. He obviously wasn't happy about it, but it had to be done. And he would be having words with Hange about how invasive these tests might be.

Erwin sighed and closed his paperwork. "Ok everyone, thank you. You all did an excellent job out there. And don't forget, everything we learnt from your mission is extremely important and will assist us in our fight to prevail." Hands saluted and you all began to make your way out of the room, the mood a bit darker than it had been at the start of the meeting. "Levi, a moment please?" you heard as you left, and shut the door softly, leaving the two men to speak.

Levi continued to gaze with disinterest, his arms crossed across his chest that was clad in his black casual clothes.

"Sit, please." Erwin motioned to the chair but the pale man didn't move, just stayed leaning against the wall on his left shoulder, staring out to the landscape. The larger male sighed. "Levi, just get your ass over here and sit the fuck down, I am not in the mood to be dealing with your childish sulks." As ordered, the Captain moved to take a seat on the wooden chair, eyes emotionless. He threw his right elbow over the back of the seat and crossed his strong legs, but would still not make eye contact with his superior.

"Tell me." It was a simple instruction, one that Levi understood the meaning of, but he chose to ignore that fact. 

"Tell you what?" he grumbled. It was going to be one of those days, Erwin thought as he leant over the desk. 

"Levi, did I not just say I am not in the mood for your attitude? You know what I meant so just get on with it. Are you ok? Witnessing and dealing with the death of a loved one, regardless of how long that death lasts for, is a strain on the soul, on the mind. I need to know if you're ok and able for duty."

Now he made eye contact, steely orbs cutting into the larger man's gaze. "Of course I'm able for duty, do you think I'm a fucking child?" he spat. The blonde shook his head slowly and looked over at his friend. 

"I'm just concerned, for both of you. If you feel that you need to speak, my door is always open." Knowing that his words were pointless, the Commander motioned to let Levi know he could leave. Taking the cue, the dark haired male stood and made for the door as fast as he could. He was feeling uncomfortable hearing Erwin talk about things like that. His hand reached the handle as a voice sounded from behind him once more. "I'm happy you found someone."

It was nearly evening as you sat in Hange's lab, an array of various medical instruments in front of her. Levi had insisted on accompanying you and he sat closely at your side, eyes scanning over everything. "I'm just going to take some blood, ok?" she began, and you stuck your arm out for her. Done, she moved on to saliva and slightly embarrassingly, urine. That at least was done alone in a private room. She then attached some bizarre contraptions on your head and excitedly made notes, although you didn't know why - the things she placed on you did nothing.

She pulled your lids down and looked closely at your eyes, checked your ears, heart rate, everything. "It would have been better if I could have done this before, but I'm not going to get you to die again, don't worry." You were aware of a low growl beside you, a warning shot from Levi. Finally, she seemed to have run out of things to prod you with and let you leave with the promise of a breakfast date in the morning.

Walking down the corridors, you spoke softly. "What happens now?" Levi shrugged. 

"I guess we continue with the plans for Eren to plug the hole in Wall Maria," he said. "And we wait for news on Alfonz." His expression darkened at the name of the man who had caused you all so much distress. You touched his arm lightly in a gesture that told him you felt the same, but it would be ok. Suddenly he stopped, and turned quickly to you.

"Erwin really pissed me off just now, (F/N). I want to make sure he doesn't get any sleep tonight." With that, he walked off towards the mess hall, leaving you standing with your heart pounding in your chest and smile on your face.

Before you could sit down to eat, bodies piled on to you. "Hey guys, I'm only little!" you shouted in your defence. The three men laughed and sat down around you. Paul still looked pretty confused about everything that was going on around him and stared slackly at you. Jean looked a bit disgruntled, but Jared had his evil grin across his face as he elbowed you in the ribs. 

"So, that was new, (F/N)?" he said in a low voice. You looked at him with narrowed eyes and pointed in his direction. 

"You're treading on thin ice here, boys." Placing emphasis on the last word, it had the desired effect. "Don't ask questions about what you can't handle." They jeered at your comment, all in good fun though, but then they started thinking. In their testosterone clouded brains, you could see the moment where they started to imagine you and the Captain together. And then you saw the moment when they tried to get the thought out of their heads.

~~~~~~

You laid on your back, enjoying the sensation of hands all over every inch of you, lips kissing you. Soft candle light bathed the room, a surprise that Levi had set up. It made the atmosphere ten times more sensual and as you gazed up at your lover's body you saw the flickering shadows accentuate every defined muscle. It sent a chill through you as he sat up on his knees to look down on you through strands of jet black hair, the orange light in the room highlighting his face in a soft but dangerous glow. He casually pushed his hair back, staring upon you with a lust that surpassed anything you had seen him show before. You bit your lip and beckoned to him seductively. He smirked, a coy expression on his face as his naked body crawled up the bed towards you, his hands parting your thighs gently on his way. He looked like he was stalking you as silver eyes met yours at close proximity.

He hovered over you for a moment, prolonging your anticipation. You couldn't stand it anymore and he knew it. He felt your body wriggle with heat below him and his smirk grew. "You want me?" he purred, lips brushing against yours, teasing you by not actually kissing them. 

"Oh Levi, you know I do, please...." Now his mouth ran up and down your neck, still refusing to plant a kiss on your skin. You involuntarily moaned out his name as he pressed his hardness against you. 

"That's it (F/N), beg. I want to hear my name from your lips over and over. And then I might just let you have me." Even whilst he spoke, you were practically chanting his name and pleading, volume increasing without thinking about what you were doing - twenty minutes he'd been at it, taunting you and winding you up exquisitely. All reason left you as his lips danced over your ear and he flicked his tongue out to lick it ever so quickly.

You tipped over the edge of coherent thought at that moment and used your strength to throw him over and down onto his back, jumping on top of him in the process. His expression remained steady, the same smirk playing on his pout and before you knew what happened, you were picked up and placed on your knees on the bed, hands up against the wall. He was behind you, arms either side, his own palms on the surface next to yours. His face was beside your cheek, lips next to your lobe. You felt his hair tickle your neck and warm breath as he spoke in with a silken voice. "I'm going to make you feel things you never imagined were possible."

And he was in you, hard and deep from behind, his chest pressed against your back. Over and over he pounded into you slowly, his breaths and moans so close. You groaned his name in pure pleasure and felt his right hand run down your body, over your stomach and then lower still. His pace quickened as he used his fingers to rub circles on your heat, his mouth on your shoulder biting lightly. Throwing your head back against him, your pants and breaths became quicker, more urgent. Levi grabbed your hips suddenly and bent you forward further, now slamming roughly into you as you felt your insides explode with fire. You called his name again, loud and hungry this time and you heard him swearing and moaning behind you. With lights flashing in your eyes, you both reached your peak together in a tangle of sweat, expletives and carnal noises.

Collapsing on the bed, neither of you could speak for a while. Composure eventually regained, you turned round to face him. "Wow," he breathed. "We have to do that again soon." You chuckled and cuddled into him, glad to be alive and here with him.


	11. Closure

Weeks passed and bad weather had blown in, wind tugging at everything it could and icy showers of rain beat down on the earth. Most training was carried out inside, apart from practicing with your gear in the storm. Plans were nearly in place to seal the wall, but there had been no word about Alfonz. Rumours had spread that someone could read minds, but as yet, no one had approached you about it. You didn't know how it started, but thought it might have had something to do with a certain evening when the leftover alcohol had been flowing.

Hange had turned her attention to Eren's hardening abilities, leaving you relatively free to train and spar. You went on supply runs, visits to the nearby towns and generally immersed yourself in what passed for normal around here. Erwin had yet again chastised you and Levi, grumbling about how noises like that shouldn't be possible and threatening you both with a cell in the dungeon at one point. Hersh had been interrogated more, seeing as news of his leader wasn't forthcoming, but that had drawn a blank. In the end, the military police took him off your hands.

You became close with the three men that were there on the day you died. It sounded fucking weird to say it like that, but it was the strange truth. You weren't exactly normal, after all. The four of you were quite the group and you enjoyed sparring with them. It was good to put your strength to use again and you found yourself back in peak condition. Your friends regularly teased you about your relationship, but you gave as good as you got, usually making them the ones who begged you to stop. Scared to try your thoughts on titans again, you had been out a few times to practice on Eren and had come out victorious, your side effects lessening again each time. You were still very fond of him, but kept your distance to avoid the wrath of Mikasa.

Levi had left yesterday to attend meetings being held in the inner walls with Jacob, all about politics and funding he had said, seething with anger at having to get caught up in it all. You missed him already. Before he had left, he told you he'd a gift for you and he would give it to you on his return. In response to the dirty question you had then asked him, he told you no, it was not any of his body parts tied up in a ribbon. You remembered that conversation and smiled as you set about scrubbing the floors in the hall - a duty no one wanted but everyone had to do and it was your turn today.

You heard footsteps and hoped they wouldn't mess up your clean floor. Shit, you sounded like Levi. Sitting up on your heels, you watched as Hange approached and you held your hand out. "Not there!" you cried. "I just cleaned that bit!" She laughed lightly and sat at a table, waiting for you to carefully make your way over, avoiding the wet areas. Thinking how her laugh sounded hollow, you approached with concern. Sitting next to her, you spoke. "What's up? You don't look too happy?" She sighed heavily and turned to you. 

"(F/N), I have to tell you something." This didn't sound good. "It's about your blood." What? What blood? Then you remembered the tests she put you through and it seemed like it happened years ago, not weeks.

"Hange, what is it?" You grabbed her hand tightly. 

"I noticed some abnormalities, but the equipment I have here is nowhere near good enough," she explained. "So I sent it to a scientist I trust. His results finally arrived today." Your fingers gripped into her as she continued. "He said there was something in your DNA, something that could only have happened by injecting a foreign body that melded with your cells." So, you had purposely been given your abilities. But why? That wasn't accidental at all. Before you could ask your questions, Hange spoke once more.

"That's not all, (F/N)." Her grasp on your hand tightened. "I had asked him to test with electricity, after the shocks you sent through us that day." You muttered an apology, which she waved off. "The first time he did it, the cells effectively died and then regenerated. Like you. So he did it again." Pausing, she got ready to tell you the main point. "The second time, they were fine. Time and time again, they were fine. But they glowed, that blue glow you had when you ordered Eren that first time. (F/N), I think you might be fine to try again and if anything, you may get stronger."

The enormity of the situation started to sink in as your hands began to tremble. Hange tried to soothe you, telling you to think about it. You looked over to her. "I have to wait and talk to Levi first." Her expression softened as she smiled and pinched your cheeks. 

"Oh aren't you just too cute!" she squeaked. Slapping her hands away, you couldn't help but laugh.

~~~~~~

Three days later and you were sitting at lunch, smiling at Jean and Eren bickering over something ridiculous. Rain was pounding on the HQ and the wind rattled the shutters. Cabin fever was setting in, causing outbreaks of arguments and hormonal outbursts. Doors slammed open suddenly as a very wet and pissed looking Levi marched into the hall, green cloak flapping behind him. He was followed by Jacob who was jogging to keep up, carrying bags that looked heavy. As he strutted past, Levi's eyes darted to yours almost imperceptibly, a flash running through them before he snapped his gaze forward again. Unfortunately, you weren't the only one who noticed. Jean shuffled up to you and spoke quietly so only your small group could hear. "Woah, (F/N), looks like you're getting owned tonight!" Mischievous grins surrounded the group and you leant in to them, chin resting on your fist. 

"What makes you think that I'm not the dominant one?"

Jean started choking loudly on his food, and everyone turned to look at your table, even Levi stopped mid-stride. By that point, you had already sat up, looking as sweet as can be, sipping at your drink. Without turning, you slapped him on the back, bread shooting out of his mouth. You smiled innocently and everyone got back to what they were doing.

You saw Levi leaning over a table, talking to Erwin about something that looked serious. A frown crossed your features as you wondered what it could be.

Later that evening, you were lying on the bed, playing around with one of your lover's spare sets of straps idly, waiting for him. After dinner you had nothing much to do so just went to relax. Hearing the door, you jumped up to greet him. He had dried off a bit but still looked quite bedraggled as he stood in front of you, removing his cape. With a small squeal you ran over and threw yourself on his body like you hadn't seen him in weeks. Your legs were round his waist and arms circled his neck as you covered him in kisses. As nice as it was, he had business to attend to and he slowly slid you down off of him, planting a kiss on your forehead. "Mmm (F/N), I've missed you too. But I've got to shower, I'm filthy. And then we need to talk. I have some information you need to hear." You nodded and told him that there was news from your tests too. Slightly apprehensive, you decided to run downstairs to get some tea to help warm him as he got himself clean.

Not long after, both of you sat cuddled up on the couch as your fingers moved absent mindedly over Levi's leg, tracing nonsense shapes. He was wearing his black top and trousers, an outfit that always appealed to you. Having explained the news Hange had given you, he was thinking it over. "I'm worried (F/N). You can't go through that again. I can't go through that again. But, if what she says is right, it could change everything." He sighed and sipped his tea as you both stared into the flickering movement of the fire in the hearth. That was a decision that could wait. He began to tell you about how awful and boring most of his time away had been, but the conclusion shocked you.

"I ran into an old friend of mine," he said. You knew it was not a friend by the way he spoke and you also knew instinctively it was someone who used to live in the underground city. "I leaned on him slightly to get some information." In other words, probably tortured him to some degree. It didn't bother you in the slightest. You got what you were willing to take. "And we have a location for Alfonz." You sprung up and stared at him. The news you had been waiting so long for was finally here and in honesty, it scared you. Levi saw and expected, your worry and pulled you back into him. "It's late (F/N). We need to think about all this and address it fully with Erwin in the morning." Knowing he was right, you tried to push it all to the back of your mind as he led you through to bed.

You were woken by the sound of a storm raging outside, rain beating against the windows and you glanced over to see Levi's face, sound asleep. He looked so peaceful, no frown on his features, just a picture of serenity. This was a rare moment that you wished you could capture. Moving, you felt a familiar tug at your skin. Lifting your arm, you recalled last night as the straps that you had been messing with before the man's return were now tied loosely to you. Shaking them off carefully, you turned back to watch the person next to you sleeping, feeling totally at peace as you heard the faint sounds of his breath. This would all come shattering down though, the lull would be broken into a thousand shards and you would find yourself fighting for your life and those of your loved ones soon. Both of yesterday's revelations meant that once more, there would come a bloody battle.

"It's not nice to wake up to a scowl like that, (F/N)." Levi's voice startled you out of your thoughts and you realised that you must have been frowning deeply as you pondered the not so distant future. You leant in to kiss his soft lips and brushed hair from his eyes. Sighing, you looked over every part of his pale face, taking in each and every feature, imprinting it even more so to your mind. 

"I'm a bit scared to be honest, Levi," you began. "I don't know what to do right now. Do I try with the titans again? And how the fuck is a bit of that stupid rock going to help me kill someone who can't be killed?" Panic laced your words as your concern grew even more.

A hand was placed on yours, as his thumb gently stroked your skin. "(F/N), I know what it's like to have the weight of the world on your shoulders. But you're not going to have to burden that alone. You have me." His soft words did lift your spirits slightly, pulling you that little bit out of the fear that crept over you like a nest of spiders. He turned and you heard him shuffling with things on the table next to the bed. Facing you once more, he held up a small parcel wrapped in brown paper. Your eyes widened; you'd forgotten he had a gift for you. He smiled, and placed the item in your hand. "Open it." You carefully took the paper off to reveal a piece of cloth. Wrapped inside was a necklace with a small simple pendant, tear shaped with a delicate gleaming stone that seemed to be so many different colours all at once.

This was the first time anyone had given you a present and you felt tears pinching at your eyes as he gently placed it round your neck, fingers securing the clasp behind you. He let it drop against your skin, the length of the chain meaning that the pendant sat just above your breasts and would be easily hidden and secured beneath your uniform to avoid damaging it. Levi touched it gently and smiled once again. "It looks beautiful on you (F/N), I knew it would. It suits your (e/c) eyes." You grabbed hold of him, words of thanks and surprise spilling from your mouth. 

"Where did you...when...?" you stuttered. 

"I picked it up yesterday before I returned. A jeweller owed me a favour, so I wrote ahead and called it in and asked him to make this." You didn't want to know how the favour had come to be owed, all the dark thoughts you had earlier washed away.

~~~~~~

Standing in Erwin's office, you felt your gift resting gently on your skin, and it made you feel safe. You did your best to stop from to reaching and touching it, hands firmly behind your back. Levi was, as usual, leaning on his favourite piece of wall and both the Commander and Hange sat at the large wooden desk.

Everyone was up to speed on the recent information, and the blonde turned to you. "I suppose the question is, what order do we do things in?" That was a query you'd been thinking about and seeing as he seemed to be asking your opinion, you spoke your mind. 

"I think Alfonz takes priority. I'll be honest, I'm more confident with that than I am with the titans. And once he's been taken care of, we can concentrate on what we're supposed to be here to do." Your strong tone rang through the office as you confidently spoke to those assembled. They seemed to be mulling it over and you could feel a steely gaze on you as you stared straight ahead at the back wall. Nodding, Erwin spoke up. 

"Agreed. What do you two think?" Hange looked a bit upset at the prospect of leaving the experiments until a later date, but agreed all the same. Levi looked conflicted as he added his thoughts. 

"I don't like either of them, but yes, let's get rid of the fucker first."

It was settled - you would be leaving soon to seek out the man that you had to kill and you hoped might also give some answers before you silenced him forever. The four of you made plans and discussed strategies - there had been talk of you going with the squad that had been gathered for your last mission, but Levi had dismissed that. "No. It only needs (F/N) and me." He was very insistent on this and Erwin accepted the recommendation. Less people meant less attention and made it easier to remain covert.

The mission would be simple - reach Alfonz's location, which would take most of the day. Smaller pieces of the obsidian had been created from the large lump you brought back from outside the walls and you would take a few of them, at least two on your person at any given time, just to be safe. And then, you didn't know what would happen. It was down to you after that and you just hoped you would know what to do when the time came. A safe house was being arranged which would act as your base. If anything went wrong, or you became separated, you would meet back there. Also it would give you a place to sleep and restore your energy after the long ride.

You and Levi walked back to the mess hall in silence, both of your thoughts pinned on one thing and one thing only. How to get through this. Breakfast had pretty much finished as you reached the hall and only a few people remained. You waved over at Eren with a smile as you picked up some food. For the first time, you and your lover sat together at a table in the corner, whispering your thoughts about the task that lay ahead. "My source has given me a description and also a very detailed account on where he's holed up" explained Levi. Alfonz was a ratty looking man with lank hair, stubble and more bones than flesh on his frame. He would be scruffily dressed, no doubt and was currently hiding in a dilapidated building behind some shops. 

His need to steal to survive had been noted by the military police, hence why he was living as a fugitive. That kind of behaviour was not tolerated as it was in the underground and he had set many alarm bells ringing with those in authority. He knew they couldn't kill him but the thought of an eternity in a cell was not appealing and although he wouldn't be dead, he would no doubt be tortured.

"We should watch him to get a sense of his movements once we get there and also over the day after. I don't want to go blasting in without doing any recon." Levi nodded at your words, agreeing with the strategy. Again he thought about how nice it was to have someone that had a grasp on reality, to have someone who didn't need to wait for orders before they knew what to do. "And I think when we make a move, it should be after dark unless his movements don't allow it. It will be quieter, granted, but if we can avoid being seen as much as possible then it makes for an easier ambush." Wise words. The pale man placed his cup on the table carefully and looked up at you. 

"I don't know what it is you're supposed to do, but no matter what, I will be there right fucking next to you (F/N)." You smiled and nodded your thanks and saw a steely glint of determination in his eyes that only served to strengthen your own thoughts.

~~~~~~~

At the first sign of sunrise the next day, the two of you were ready and mounted on your horses. Again, Erwin had devised a cover story but you didn't know the details. He had wanted to keep your minds clear of any unnecessary information. Dressed in dark civilian clothing, as you were when you raced to obtain the stones, you draped a black cloak around yourself. It wasn't raining yet, but by the looks of it, it wouldn't be too long before the sky emptied its contents on you once again. 

You each had small bags packed with medical supplies, food, a slight amount of extra clothing and weapons. You weren't taking your gear with you, there was no point - this was not a mission that required that kind of movement. Saluting you across his chest, Erwin bid you farewell. You had already said goodbye to Hange last night and the woman had clung on to you tightly, wishing you good luck and making you promise you'd be safe. At the large man's command you were off, horses pounding over the ground, obscured sunlight beginning to touch the world around you.

You had made a few stops on the way to rest your beasts and yourselves, but made good time and were at the safe house before night fall, carefully slipping inside. The base was located above a butcher's shop and the smell of death and raw meat circled around you.

The window from the small apartment looked out over Alfonz's shack and you set a chair close to it to watch carefully. Making mental notes, you saw him leave just after the skies went dark and he returned around an hour later, carrying a bag that was laden with presumably stolen supplies. A small light shone from inside and you could see movement. Not long after, the light was extinguished. You leant back on the chair and put your feet up on the small table that stood beside you, pulling your boots off to relieve the throbbing pain in your toes. "Tch." The noise of disapproval shot though the darkened room and you chuckled lightly.

Levi and you had taken it in turns to keep watch, allowing the other to get some rest. The faint wintry light of morning crept over the small town, mist rising from the rivers that ran close by curled around the buildings. You boiled some water in the tiny kitchen area and brewed tea from the small pot of leaves that you had brought with you in your bag. Passing a cup to Levi, you moved to the window to look out once more. 

There was activity in the shack again and you both watched closely as your enemy left, empty bag in hand. "He's going out for more supplies," you said with urgency. "We need to get in there and see what the lay out is." You watched quietly as the disheveled man scuttled down lanes towards the market. Early morning shoppers were gathered, all wanting to get the freshest produce that the vendors had brought with them today.

As soon as you were satisfied that he wouldn't see you breaking in to his abode, you crept out, cloaks wrapped tightly around you and hoods up. With stealth, you entered the shack easily. There was, of course, no lock. Who would want to break in to a run down building like this? Surveying the room, you saw how filthy and scant it was, the man had practically been living in squalor here. Levi muttered remarks about the environment he was in but made careful notes in his mind of everything that was in there. A bed against the back wall with a small shelf above. A tiny stove next to a bucket that seemed to serve as a place to wash. Threadbare rug on the creaky wooden floors. The cloth was the location for a chair and a small table, one which had a lamp on top, along with an empty cup. This was obviously where he would have been sat last night to eat his ill-gotten goods.

You paid attention to the walls, looking for any cracks between the door and the bricks, any vantage point that he could see out of to alert him to your presence. There were none, only one small window to the side which you would not be passing. You motioned to Levi and you left, swiftly returning to the small apartment. Time went by slowly. You had both agreed that if he stayed true to his activities, he would likely go out at the same time as last night. There was good scrounging to be had from the backs of taverns at closing time. After he left, you would both enter his house once more, under cover of darkness and wait for him to return. Levi would keep his distance and let you take control. 

As the hours ticked by, you kept watch on the shack still to make sure no one else had entered during the day. To be ambushed on an ambush would not be a good thing. You managed to keep your hands off each other, having been told to "train your concentration on the task at hand", a thinly veiled threat from Erwin. He needn't have bothered, you were both acutely aware of the importance of this mission.

Darkness finally gripped the town and you stood at the window, waiting. Your boots had a small blade in each, a habit that you had picked up many years ago and had relied on them twice since being in the Survey Corps. A larger curved blade was in your right hand, grip tight around it. Levi watched as you lifted your left hand to touch the small lump under your top, feeling the necklace that sat there to comfort you. Eyes flashing, you saw Alfonz leave, his hunched figure disappearing up the street. Without hesitation you both left.

Taking your places behind where the door would open, you breathed steadily, calming your nerves. Obsidian weighed heavy in your pockets and you twirled the knife in your hand. After while, you saw a dark figure passing the window and your adrenaline kicked in. The door opened with a creak and slammed shut on it's own once the occupant of the shack had entered. He moved in shuffles to the chair, placed his bag on the floor and turned on the lamp. That's when you moved. Before he could tell what was going on, he was pushed into the chair with force, a cry escaping his dry, cracked lips. He looked up at the person who loomed over him, light from the lamp illuminating your features in a sinister fashion. He smiled.

"I was wondering when you'd show up," he said in a raspy voice. Levi hung back in the shadows but kept his piercing glare on the man. "And you brought a friend, how nice!" Alfonz seemed to be enjoying himself. You moved closer and saw him flinch in pain. The stones in your pockets were causing him harm somehow and you smirked at the sight of his discomfort. He shifted nervously in the chair and rubbed his flaky skinned cheek. "I suppose you want to know what's going on?" he asked. You raised your eyebrow. 

"It would be rude not to know why I'm killing you." Your voice was dripping in hatred, a dangerous tone to it that matched the glimmer in your eyes.

"Fair enough, fair enough," he coughed. "It's quite simple really. Your parents rented you to us as an infant to experiment on." He must have seen the look on your face change and cackled. It sounded like dry paper being torn. "Oh come now, you must have known they didn't want you? They did abandon you after all. But before that, they thought they might as well make some money out of you." You fury was unbelievable, hatred burning in you like a furnace. "I told you that you weren't allowed to love. No one loves you, why would they? Not even your own flesh and blood could stand to be near you."

You rammed your foot against his frail chest, holding him in place with your boot. "Fuck off," you growled. 

"Oh ho ho, such strong language for a sweet, innocent girl," he crooned. Leaning forward over your leg, you laughed, a noise with no humour. "What makes you think I'm so innocent, you piece of shit?" His eyes widened, there must have been something in your voice that scared him and you brought the hand that held your knife up across your body to your left shoulder, ready to strike.

Voice shaking, he spoke for a final time. "Trust me, even that man standing glaring at me will get fed up of you. You're nothing. Just a worthless little girl whose parents sold her body to a dirty old man for experimentation. You might not remember it, memories get suppressed easily, but we knew each other for a long time, you and me. We got quite close too, if you know what I mean, (F/N). Quite close indeed." He licked his disgusting lips and rage shot out of you in waves. "You were born without love and you will die without it too." You brought your hand down in a strong arcing movement, blade slicing easily through frail, wrinkled skin, arteries and windpipe. As his warm blood sprayed, you realised how clever he had been - he had riled you up to such a point that you would kill him outright, avoiding torture.

His last gasping noises faded and as the life left him a bright light flashed from his dead body. It was so strong that you and Levi had to raise your arms to shield your eyes. A vibration ripped through your body, shaking your bones. You felt a surge of power as the light moved into you and then it went dark. A pile of ashes was all that remained of Alfonz, the man who had such an impact on your life.


	12. Happiness, finally

Before you could begin to process the events of the last few minutes, Levi grabbed your hand and you quickly made your way back to the safe house. Entering the small room, you walked over to the tiny bed and sat heavily on it, breath escaping your lungs in a loud huff. A wet cloth hit you in the head and you looked over to see a face that told you to clean up or leave. Rubbing at the blood on your skin, it became clear this wasn't really helping. What you needed was a proper shower but you didn't know when you would get one - it was many hours journey back home. Getting frustrated, you threw the piece of fabric to the floor.

The stern man came and sat next to you, speaking gently. "Did that light do anything to you?" Nodding solemnly, you looked up into his narrowed eyes. 

"I don't know if it affected my ability yet or not, but I felt something change." He sat silently for a while, looking down at his boots. When he spoke, it was with a great sorrow. 

"(F/N), did that man bring memories back?" A simple question with so much gravity to it. You nodded again and felt tears threaten to fall. Staying strong, you took a deep, shaking breath and grit your teeth. His hand rested on your leg and squeezed lightly. Levi didn't know what to do, whether you would feel repulsed to be touched now that the suppressed information in your brain had been unlocked. Slowly, you turned and put your arms around him, holding tightly to the man you loved. He returned the embrace, relieved that it didn't seem to have affected how you felt towards him. His mind was open and without meaning to, you felt his emotions. 

"Levi, that was in the past. It doesn't make any difference to my love for you." Squeezing you tighter still, he placed his head against your shoulder and enjoyed the feeling of closeness, his thoughts full of how strong you really were.

The decision had been made to travel back at night under the cover of darkness and your heart felt lifted at the sight of the headquarters before you. You had made it back before sunrise and tended to the horses quickly. Deserted halls echoed with your footsteps as you made your way back home. You considered the small quarters your home now, yes. It was full of more love and happy memories from the past few months than you had ever had your whole life. Yet again, Levi ordered you to shower straight away, his disgust evident as the lamp light had illuminated your blood-stained exterior. As the water washed the filthy man's life away, uninvited memories invaded your thoughts. Memories of rough, claw-like hands touching you, rancid breath on your face, unbelievable pain.

Shaking, you placed those thoughts far, far down inside and touched the pendant once more. It might have seemed like an inconsequential gift to someone richer or more used to receiving presents, but to you it was a promise. A declaration of love that had been sealed in the almost majestic stone.

As you dried down, you realised how damn tired you were. You could literally feel your eyelids without touching them and were acutely aware of how puffy they must look. Splashing cold water on your face, you attempted to wake yourself up a bit. You walked into the bedroom to find Levi looking some clothes out for you, neatly placing them on the mattress in the order you would be putting them on. Watching his habitual actions made you smile and your heart swelled with love. He turned as he heard you enter the room and his expression darkened. "You need sleep, (F/N). Have you seen yourself?" Grunting in reply, you rubbed your hair with a towel to speed up the drying process. 

"Thanks, Levi. Way to make a girl feel special." It was only said with half seriousness and he grabbed you into a hug, stroking your wet hair, breathing in the scent of the soap as he spoke. 

"You know I only mean it with love, shit head." You slapped him hard on the arm and moved to get dressed. As you both got ready to leave for yet another early morning debrief, he turned to you again, worry pulling at his scowl. "I mean it, after this fucking meeting, you need to rest." You nodded, knowing he was right.

The usual trio of your superiors were waiting for you both in Erwin's office and you noticed Hange's hair was a bit wild. The early debriefs must be taking their toll on her, you thought and you ruffled the mop on her head gently as you approached. She shot you a grin and squeezed your ass as you walked past. The three men in the room raised their eyebrows in unison at the action and at the fact that you didn't even flinch. Hange raised her hands with an innocent look and glanced at Levi. His gaze was emotionless but his eyes flickered with a hint of annoyance. "What?" she protested. "Can't a girl get a bit of action? Why does shorty get all the fun?" The Commander looked completely confused, Jacob's mouth hung open and your man looked ready to kill. You were actually quite surprised yourself.

"Hange," began Erwin. "I think you need to get some sleep." She visibly snapped out of it and her face moulded into something between shock and fatigue. 

"I'm sorry, you're right, I've been up for days looking over my notes." She rubbed her face, glasses tilting. The work with Eren had been taking it's toll and you guessed she had been reading over everything to do with you too. Erwin nodded. 

"Ok," he said. "Judging by the faces I see in front of me, rest is needed." He looked to both of the women in the room in particular. "Let's debrief first, then some real down time. And that is an order." That was definitely aimed at the two lovers.

You began to explain what had happened last night, leaving no detail unspoken. It just all came spilling out as a kind of therapy and you felt you owed those around the full story, as painful as it may be. As you finished, every gaze was upon you. It was awkward and you fiddled with the shape beneath your shirt unconsciously, wishing they would stop staring. Levi felt your discomfort and saw it too as you touched the gift he had given you. As much as you could read people in your own way, he had a good handle on your emotions too.

His voice cut through the silence. "That's enough." Two words shook everyone from their thoughts and eyes moved from you to look downwards like they had been caught looking at something they shouldn't. In an unexpected action, he pulled you up from where you sat, arm around your waist and he guided you out of the room. Leaving you outside the door, he kissed you gently on the lips and then stepped back in to the office quickly to address the people left within. Coldly, his voice spoke to them in quiet tones. "This is over. I'm not asking, I'm fucking telling." He went to leave the room again, the remaining occupants shrouded in silence. But before could slam the door, Erwin reached him swiftly and spoke in whispers in his ear. Whatever he said, it made Levi's eyes widen slightly. Unspoken words passed between them, ending in the Captain's nod.

~~~~~~

It had been a week since you had taken the life of the man responsible for your abilities and you were getting ready to try them out again. Your nerves were frayed as you pulled the straps on carefully over your uniform, fingers shaking around the leather. Levi watched you from his desk; he was supposed to be reading over the expedition notes, but he knew them off by heart already. He looked at your frustrated face as you struggled to calm your tremors and get the complicated mess of equipment into order. Finally, you triumphed and stood, pulling your hair up into a tie at the back of your head. You moved over to look out the window, but before you could make it, strong hands grabbed you and you found yourself sitting on his lap.

"I just got these fucking things on, Levi, don't go ripping them off again!" you said, pretending to be annoyed. He flicked you on the forehead with his finger. 

"Shut up and listen, brat." His expression was serious. "I know you're worried, (F/N), but it'll be better than last time." He stroked your back gently as he spoke, soothing your mind. You weren't worried, you were downright petrified. Hange had suggested trying your abilities on a smaller group of titans and told you to concentrate on just two of them this time. Any others that turned up would be dealt with in the traditional way. Levi had discussed it with you too and although you were both acutely aware of what happened before, you felt that it would be different. The combination of the scientist's results and the light that had entered you made it seem more plausible that you would be ok.

The same squad would be in attendance and some subtle differences made this attempt safer. Hange had created some thick, protective gloves for her and Levi to wear when holding on to you and matching bindings would be placed on your arms to minimise the risk of another electric burn. Also, Erwin would be heading the mission, despite the Captain telling him that he'd be a hindrance in his condition. The larger man had won that argument easily.

You had all gathered by the gates, staring defiantly at the large entrance. Again, it was close to night fall and the clouds were thinly cast across the sky, hints of stars twinkling through them. "Lets fucking do this!" shouted Jean, shooting you a proud look. Smiling back, you felt your stomach flip as the huge gates began to open. Levi clicked his tongue at the act of bravado and glanced over to gauge your demeanour. You looked ready, if a little nervous. That was understandable. Meeting his gaze, you sent a strong thought in to his mind, your abilities manifesting themselves with an ease you hadn't possessed before. "Love you." 

His voice then appeared in your head with such unbelievable clarity. "Love you, (F/N). Now get the fuck out of my head." You laughed heartily as you saw his smirk and realised how for the first time ever, you had sent a clear message and then read the usually closed man like he had been speaking to you. This could only bode well for your mission. Everyone looked over as they heard your hilarity, wondering what was going on. 

"Eyes forward," shouted Erwin and you set off out of the gates, thundering on horseback towards the trees.

It went as before and you had gathered the attention of five titans. Two were smaller, so you decided to concentrate on those. Everyone was in position as gloved hands grabbed you tightly across the padding on your arms. Blades had been drawn by the others, ready to take the surplus enemies down. Nods passed between you all, and Levi's soft voice spoke in your ear in a mirror of the first time. "Go."

You pushed your thoughts out to the two lesser, dopey looking titans, ordering them to die there and then, just right where they stood. Lie down and fucking die. It felt different, it wasn't so much of an effort as before, but regardless you pushed with the same urgency. Eyes stared as you glowed a light blue, leaves whirling around. Levi and Hange held tightly, the padding doing their job. They narrowed their eyes at the brightness flowing from you and it seemed never ending as you stood staring straight down. There was no pain or blindness this time. Realising you must have been doing this for at least five minutes, you began to slow your thoughts.

Silence descended as you saw the moonlight trickling through the canopy of the forest. You turned your head around, looking with wide eyes at the pale man. You didn't know what you'd done, but it felt different. It felt big. They released their grip and you carefully shuffled to the trunk of the tree for safety. Noticing all eyes were turned down to look at the ground, all mouths open, you looked at where their gazes had landed and gasped. All five titans were now steaming heaps of flesh and bones, disappearing slowly in their vapour clad deaths. All five.

You were snapped out of your thoughts as Erwin spoke, his voice loud in the otherwise quiet forest. "Look." Everyone gazed at where he pointed. Towers of vapour rose from the ground all around you, as far as the eye could see. 

"Fuck me, (F/N), did you order all of them?" said Jared, his eyes staring off into the distance. As you looked at the unexpected sight, you shrugged. 

"I might have done, yea. Erm..." You trailed off as you lost the ability to form any other kind of answer - you'd been looking down at the two small titans, but you pushed with the same ferocity as you had last time. Given the unspoken exchange you had before you left the walls, maybe you hadn't needed to go so hard, your power was seemingly stronger now.

You felt Levi's touch and you grabbed out, both of you standing holding hands, gazing out across the landscape. "Oh shit. Did I just…?" You wouldn't allow yourself to finish the sentence, fearing that once the words were spoken, they would cease to be true. Your lover squeezed tight as Hange suddenly clutched the pair of you, almost screaming in your faces. 

"They're all dead! All of them around us! DEAD!" That sparked a chain reaction and the others began to cheer and shout, taunting the corpses that were littered all around.

The sound of gas rang out as you all made your way down to the forest floor. Another group hug broke out and you ran to get involved, launching yourself on top of Jared's back. Levi watched from a safe distance as you all jumped around like idiots, his face unmoved by the joy in the air. "Hey short stuff, get involved!" He just shook his head at the crazed woman and rolled his eyes, arms crossed firmly across his chest. You escaped the mass of bodies and ran to him. He gathered you up in to a tight embrace, holding on to you fiercely. 

"(F/N), you are amazing, you know that?" he whispered into your ear. Grinning, you replied. 

"Thank you."

~~~~~~

Almost six months had passed without incident. Recon missions had gone out regularly, reaching further than ever before. Reports confirmed that everywhere humanity went, the titans were dead, piles of charred earth remaining where terror once stood. The Survey Corps still occupied the headquarters and its grounds, but expansion had taken place. The Garrison troops had either joined your ranks or those of the Military Police. The role of the Corps was now to explore and gather intelligence, the need to endanger lives was no longer required.

To account for the increase in soldiers, you, Paul, Jared and Jean had been made squad leaders, along with five others. You had your own office but rarely went in it, preferring to spend your time amongst the others. And of course, you still stayed in Levi's quarters, much to the annoyance of Erwin.

Talks were being held in the inner walls about the potential to establish a small settlement outside the walls, but nerves were still holding this move back. Hange experimented on the burnt soil with glee, much to the amusement of everyone around. They couldn't understand why she was bothering with it all seeing as the old enemy seemed to be dead.

The grounds were a buzz of excitement today as the hall was prepared for a great feast. Decorations were hung and all sorts of food and drink was gathered. In a nearby city, arrangements were underway on a smaller scale. Inside the government building in a small room, Erwin stood smiling at his friend. "Calm down, Levi. Patience is a virtue, remember?" The dark haired man grimaced. 

"Fuck off." The blonde laughed as he watched his friend smoothing out his suit, ridding himself of any creases and traces of fluff.

In an identical space, Hange fussed around you, poking and prodding. "Ok, ok, that's enough," you told your friend. 

"Oh but (F/N), just this last thing, pleeeeease?" Sighing, you stood still as she added her final touch. Standing back, she looked you up and down, checking out her handiwork, eyes welling with tears. Your (h/c) hair was set in soft waves, (e/c) eyes accentuated with dark, delicate liner. A slight pink tint had been applied to your lips, giving you the appearance of someone more innocent than you actually were. A simple white dress clung to your curves in a flattering style, sleeves coming to the elbows and the flowing skirt reached the floor, prized necklace shining brightly at your chest. Hange's finishing touch was a small, delicate flower in your locks.

You sighed nervously and looked at her in trepidation. She stuck her thumbs up as the door opened and Erwin's head popped in. "Ready?" he asked. 

"As I'll ever be," you said in a shaky voice. Your friend squeaked and ran out, her own pretty dress flapping at her feet. The Commander held his arm out and you took it, gazing up into his smiling face.

Walking down the hallway, you came to an open door. Beaming with pride, the man in charge led you through and closed it behind him, grinning faces of your closest friends standing staring at you with excitement. At the front of the room was a large oak desk and next to it was the man you loved. He looked so handsome in his suit, shoes gleaming and perfect. Levi's face broke into a smile when he set eyes on you. Not a smirk, just a huge closed-lipped smile. It lit him up with joy and it made your heart nearly burst.

Erwin took you to him and you placed a kiss on the large male's cheek, a person you considered as a strong comrade. He left to take a seat with Hange, Jacob, Jared, Paul and Jean. You and Levi stood facing the official that was behind the desk and you both repeated what he told you to, exchanged rings when he said so and signed the register when instructed. He asked the small group in the room to stand, and looked to you both with a smile. 

"It gives me great pleasure to be the first to congratulate you and I am happy to say that you are now husband and wife." The people in the room held their breaths as Levi turned to you, holding both your hands in his. "All that remains for me to say, is you may now kiss!" You didn't need be told twice and your new husband pulled you to close into a passionate embrace, his lips pressing to yours in a melting kiss. Cheers and applause rang around the room, along with the sound of Hange balling her eyes out. Before you got carried away, you parted, arms still around one another. "We did it (F/N)," he whispered and you grinned so wide that you thought your face might just get stuck like that.

You had all changed for the journey back - formal clothes didn't lend themselves to horse riding. Taking a slow pace, you all rode together, chatting excitedly. "I can't wait for the reception (F/N), it's going to to be so fun!" Paul spoke with glee and Levi looked over. 

"What reception?" Hange laughed uproariously. 

"Of course there's a reception shorty, we can't have you getting married without everyone having a party!" His face darkened and glared at her with hatred.

"Everyone? The whole fucking Corps?" She nodded and started to imagine what kind of food there would be. Silver eyes signalled you to pull back from the group a bit, and you told your house to slow. "Oi. Did you know about this, brat?" You shrugged. 

"I guessed it might happen. Also, Eren is just a mess of thoughts that just hang in the air when he's excited." His scowl deepened. "Oh come on Levi, it'll be fun. And anyway, it's not like we're a secret anymore." The small group of people who knew about your relationship had increased to include the entire operation thanks to a late night walk that the two of you had taken - someone had spotted you from afar and were very excited to see you being pressed against a tree and kissed roughly by the Captain. 

And it spread. No one really said anything directly, but they knew. Your own squad would ask you coy, half questions and you knew full well what they were getting at. 

"Tch. I suppose so. But they'd better not be expecting me to fucking dance." You laughed and turned to your friends in front, following slowly behind their horses towards home.

Your mounts were tethered and the eight of you made your way to the hall. Despite now wearing a dark top and trousers, your hair and makeup remained as they were before, the flower sitting pinned behind your ear. The clothes were tight and fit perfectly against your figure. "Hey Sir," began Jared, mischief on his face. "Aren't you supposed to carry her over the threshold?" Eyes were on the two of you, waiting expectantly. Levi kept walking, looking at no one as he answered. 

"That's the threshold of the marital home, you shit. I'll do that later." The group whistled and jeered as Erwin rolled his eyes. You were laughing with Hange, twirling the new ring on your finger as the doors to the hall flew open, revealing the decorated ceilings, delicious looking food and large pile of various alcoholic drinks. And a lot of happy faces, all staring up at you. Some of the girls sighed at the romantic situation and at your appearance - your hair was usually tied up in a bit of a mess. You saw some of the males blush and the Commander strode importantly in front of you all, first into the hall.

"I hope you all enjoy yourselves this evening, but any silly behaviour will be dealt with." Casting his gaze around the room, he then rested his stare at the door. He lifted his hand as a hearty voice boomed around the hall. "Everyone, let's hear it for the happy couple." Claps and cheers sounded as you walked in, Levi staring straight ahead as he marched off to the table at the other end, hating every minute of this situation. The rest of you struggled to keep up and you glanced through the crowds smiling at those you knew.

Reaching the table, the small wedding party sat and everyone began to chat, eat and drink. Your man fetched a cup of wine for you both and sat down to your right. "I fucking hate this, (F/N). Can't we just take some of this and go?" You elbowed him lightly. 

"It'll be fine, this lot are light weights so they'll all be fucked in no time." He nodded and cast his eyes around. True enough, someone was shouting a bit louder than usual. They must have been hitting the alcohol before you all arrived.

The evening passed quickly and with lots of laughter. You and Levi had been exchanging a few secret touches under the table, neither of you keen on public affection. It made it all feel a bit forbidden too and you felt your heat rising throughout the night. Erwin came over and stuck his head in between the two of you. "I thought you should know, I've approved plans for some new buildings on the grounds, things like a doctor's surgery and stores. The more people we have, the more services are required." You wondered why this would concern you right now and the raven haired man asked the question for you both.

"Why the fuck are you telling us?" Erwin laughed.

"Because I'm also getting them to build some living accommodation, including a larger set up for the two of you. That room's too cramped for a married couple. And it gets you away from me." You blushed, but thanked him. It was a lovely gesture. He walked off with a slight wobble and you smiled at how the drink had affected him.

You turned to your husband as you remembered something. "I meant to ask you Levi. After our last debrief, Erwin whispered something to you?" He looked over at you, sipping his drink. 

"He told me to make an honest woman of you," he stated plainly. "And I finally have." Smirking, he looked around. Plenty of people had left or passed out already. He stood up and gathered up some bottles and two cups. "Right (F/N), let's get out of here." His voice was low and silky, promising you an amazing night. You squealed as you felt yourself being picked up as he threw you over his shoulder with his free arm and marched out of the hall. Those who were still coherent whistled and shouted as they watched you being taken away, a huge grin on your face.

This was what true happiness was. There was peace, no horrific deaths, you were surrounded by your friends and now you were being carried off to have unbelievable things done to you by your husband. You were married, deeply in love, and you finally felt contentment.


	13. Epilogue

Birds flew overhead as the sun shone down in warm rays, slight summer breeze running through the trees. The hustle and bustle of the towns and villages seemed like a memory in this quiet space.

Humanity had overcome it's former battles and settlements had thrived outside the walls. Governments had been formed and peace hung over everything. All because of you. Groups of pioneers had met with other survivors, beaches and vast oceans had been discovered for the first time in living memory. Because of you.

No conflicts existed as humans once again ruled the lands, standing together united against what once was. Technology was rediscovered and everyone could now live in comfort, fresh water, light, and sustenance. Missions had been sent out across the newly discovered waters, uncharted territory no longer a threat, just a daily joy to unearth.

Two figures stood together, hand in hand, looking out over their own ocean, their own sea and their grips were tight. Four years ago, no one had remembered what they should have done, what they needed to, so caught up in the titan's demise that everyone forgot, forgot about the shifters that started this whole thing spiralling into the worst possible situation. They had to be stopped, of course, but at what price?

The power it had taken you to bring them down was unimaginable, dealing with strong minds in stronger bodies. But when your family and your friends were in danger, you did the only thing that you could - you fought. And after you had succeeded, you didn't wake up.

A smaller hand grasped tighter and let out a sigh. 'When's mummy coming home?" The same question for the last four years and it still pulled tightly at Levi's heart. Gazing out, he shook his head. 

"She's not, Neve. I'm so sorry, but she's not." A six year old should never have to hear that, but she was old enough to understand this year, understand what the sea of stones in front of her meant and what the one she stood by signified. "Humanity's Saviour" it read.

Bowing his head, Levi knelt next to his daughter, her features the total image of yours. "Daddy, what do you mean? Why are you crying? You're getting your uniform all wet." Tiny hands reached up to wipe tears away, which only made then fall harder. Pulling her into a hug, he wept. For you, for the life you were supposed to have, together.

Finally composing himself, he looked into his little girl's eyes, seeing so much of you in them. The small crowd of people behind him clung together, your closest friends all here to pay their respects as they did each year. Gathering small hands in his, Levi took a deep breath.

"Mummy saved us. Made the world a good place to live. She's watching over us Neve, I promise. And she loves us, like we love her."

Hange stepped in and took the young girl into a firm embrace, leading her away before she could see her strong father crumble completely. Falling to the ground in sobs, Levi looked up to the bird filled sky. "Thank you (F/N). I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry...


End file.
